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alisonb
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Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host.
Thought for the day
- Thread starter alisonb
- Start date
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alisonb
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'On the Plains of Hesitation bleach the bones of countless millions who, at the Dawn of Victory, sat down to wait, and waiting – died!'
George W Cecil (1891–1970)
George W Cecil (1891–1970)
greybeard
Well-known member
IF MY BODY IS EVER FOUND ON A JOGGING TRAIL JUST KNOW THAT I WAS MURDERED SOMEWHERE ELSE AND DUMPED THERE.
* RESPECT YOUR ELDERS. THEY GRADUATED FROM SCHOOL WITHOUT THE INTERNET.
* I'VE DECIDED I'M NOT OLD, I'M 45 -- PLUS SHIPPING AND HANDLING
* WHY DO I HAVE TO PRESS "1" FOR ENGLISH? DID AMERICA MOVE?
* WE HAVE ENOUGH GUN CONTROL. WHAT WE NEED IS IDIOT CONTROL.
* BEHIND EVERY ANGRY WOMAN STANDS A MAN WHO HAS ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT HE DID WRONG.
* LET'S STOP SENDING MONEY TO OTHER COUNTRIES AND LET THEM HATE US FOR FREE.
* VEGETARIAN: ANCIENT TRIBAL NAME FOR THE VILLAGE SPOKESPERSON WHO CAN'T HUNT, FISH, OR LIGHT FIRES!
* I LOOK AT PEOPLE AND SOMETIMES THINK "REALLY"? -- THAT'S THE SPERM THAT WON?"
* IN MY DEFENSE I WAS LEFT UNSUPERVISED, BUT SUPERVISION IS WAY OVER-RATED.
* IF GUNS KILL PEOPLE, THEN PENCILS MISSPELL WORDS, CARS MAKE PEOPLE DRIVE DRUNK, AND SPOONS MAKE PEOPLE FAT.
* MY DECISION-MAKING SKILLS CLOSELY RESEMBLE THOSE OF A SQUIRREL WHEN CROSSING THE ROAD, BUT BY FAR, MORE TREE RATS MAKE IT ACROSS THE ROAD THAN DO NOT.
* SOME THINGS ARE JUST BETTER LEFT UNSAID -- AND I USUALLY REALIZE IT RIGHT AFTER I SAY THEM.
* CAMPING: WHERE YOU SPEND A SMALL FORTUNE TO LIVE LIKE A HOMELESS PERSON.
* I THOUGHT GETTING OLD WOULD TAKE LONGER.
* A WISE MAN ONCE SAID - - NOTHING.
* RESPECT YOUR ELDERS. THEY GRADUATED FROM SCHOOL WITHOUT THE INTERNET.
* I'VE DECIDED I'M NOT OLD, I'M 45 -- PLUS SHIPPING AND HANDLING
* WHY DO I HAVE TO PRESS "1" FOR ENGLISH? DID AMERICA MOVE?
* WE HAVE ENOUGH GUN CONTROL. WHAT WE NEED IS IDIOT CONTROL.
* BEHIND EVERY ANGRY WOMAN STANDS A MAN WHO HAS ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT HE DID WRONG.
* LET'S STOP SENDING MONEY TO OTHER COUNTRIES AND LET THEM HATE US FOR FREE.
* VEGETARIAN: ANCIENT TRIBAL NAME FOR THE VILLAGE SPOKESPERSON WHO CAN'T HUNT, FISH, OR LIGHT FIRES!
* I LOOK AT PEOPLE AND SOMETIMES THINK "REALLY"? -- THAT'S THE SPERM THAT WON?"
* IN MY DEFENSE I WAS LEFT UNSUPERVISED, BUT SUPERVISION IS WAY OVER-RATED.
* IF GUNS KILL PEOPLE, THEN PENCILS MISSPELL WORDS, CARS MAKE PEOPLE DRIVE DRUNK, AND SPOONS MAKE PEOPLE FAT.
* MY DECISION-MAKING SKILLS CLOSELY RESEMBLE THOSE OF A SQUIRREL WHEN CROSSING THE ROAD, BUT BY FAR, MORE TREE RATS MAKE IT ACROSS THE ROAD THAN DO NOT.
* SOME THINGS ARE JUST BETTER LEFT UNSAID -- AND I USUALLY REALIZE IT RIGHT AFTER I SAY THEM.
* CAMPING: WHERE YOU SPEND A SMALL FORTUNE TO LIVE LIKE A HOMELESS PERSON.
* I THOUGHT GETTING OLD WOULD TAKE LONGER.
* A WISE MAN ONCE SAID - - NOTHING.
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alisonb
Well-known member
greybeard
Well-known member
greybeard said:
If that's what a lifetime of eating strawberries will do to you I think I'll pass.
Bright Raven
Well-known member
TennesseeTuxedo said:greybeard said:
If that's what a lifetime of eating strawberries will do to you I think I'll pass.
But she is 137 years old. I bet we will not look so good at that age.
farmerjan
Well-known member
Around here we say that "Vegetarian: Indian word for BAD HUNTER".
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alisonb
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alisonb
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alisonb
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alisonb
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alisonb
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cowboy43
Well-known member
People who eat bacon are less likely to blow themselfs up
Son of Butch
Well-known member
Fixed it for you.greybeard said:
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alisonb
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alisonb
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alisonb
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Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?
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alisonb
Well-known member
Don't burn bridges. You'll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.
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