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TexasBred

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Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Chardonnay.

Chardonnay is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Chardonnay can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Chardonnay almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Chardonnay.

Chardonnay may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Chardonnay. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister!

WARNINGS:
* The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
*The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to think you can sing.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
 
Yes, I was self medicating just last night. And I plan to again tonight. :drink:
 
Lammie":3ct2yvdc said:
Yes, I was self medicating just last night. And I plan to again tonight. :drink:

Well while we're all going to confession I guess I might as well admit. I dosed myself with a bit of fine Bud Light yesterday and will probably so the same again today. :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Jack Daniels does the same thing only it doesn't take as much and it probably works a little faster.
 
I just drank a bottle of Viva la Trailer Park. Great stuff, I hallucinated that my front yard was full of 78' Thunderbirds all on cement blocks and i had no teeth.
 
Crowderfarms":19z3kne0 said:
I just drank a bottle of Viva la Trailer Park. Great stuff, I hallucinated that my front yard was full of 78' Thunderbirds all on cement blocks and i had no teeth.

sure you was 'llucinating there Unkie C. :banana:
 
Crowderfarms":3fbjwg1d said:
I just drank a bottle of Viva la Trailer Park. Great stuff, I hallucinated that my front yard was full of 78' Thunderbirds all on cement blocks and i had no teeth.

What, no '88 Cavaliers? I had a marketing idea for Clayton single wides recently that they should throw in an '88 Cav on blocks and several old tires for the roof for that trailer house wind noise. Just to make it fit in with the neighborhood. It would have saved homeowners a good sixty bucks. I called it the Redneck Bailout plan.
 
Ripple used to work the same way. Whne it got to expensive there was always Boone farms or Richards wild irish rose
 
Lammie":1h0evqn3 said:
Crowderfarms":1h0evqn3 said:
I just drank a bottle of Viva la Trailer Park. Great stuff, I hallucinated that my front yard was full of 78' Thunderbirds all on cement blocks and i had no teeth.

What, no '88 Cavaliers? I had a marketing idea for Clayton single wides recently that they should throw in an '88 Cav on blocks and several old tires for the roof for that trailer house wind noise. Just to make it fit in with the neighborhood. It would have saved homeowners a good sixty bucks. I called it the Redneck Bailout plan.

Hmmm. Buy a trailer, get a lawn ornament.
I guess I am a rich redneck. I have sheds for most all of my "up on blocks" stuff.
I lived in a 12*46 at one time. And, I actually talked a nice girl into marriage while I lived there. Trailer homes have a place in this world.
 
curtis":2hmjtamz said:
Jack Daniels does the same thing only it doesn't take as much and it probably works a little faster.

My favorite! Served neat and chilled.

Jack was the man and still is today! :tiphat:
 
chrisy":1s3znxfk said:
Crowderfarms":1s3znxfk said:
I just drank a bottle of Viva la Trailer Park. Great stuff, I hallucinated that my front yard was full of 78' Thunderbirds all on cement blocks and i had no teeth.

sure you was 'llucinating there Unkie C. :banana:
These day, my lil' darlin' across the pond, I dont really know! :wave:
 
grannysoo":1j5ifpb0 said:
curtis":1j5ifpb0 said:
Jack Daniels does the same thing only it doesn't take as much and it probably works a little faster.

My favorite! Served neat and chilled.

Jack was the man and still is today! :tiphat:

Never understood why but Jack alway gave me the heartburn...might have had more to do with quantity than quality. :drink: :drink: :drink:
 

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