Free Time

[Bright Raven]

Are you hired by HEROFAN or self appointed ???

That is privileged information.

Regarding your defense. Is a denial coming? You have confessed that being an azzhole is ok with you. I assume a denial is not forthcoming.

Your the resident " superiority complex" expert so you figure it out.

Two points to help you become all you can be:

1. When they start getting defensive and especially if they resort to insults, you are hitting them where they live.

2. Never offer a denial! Think where this country would be if George Washington said, "Dad, I did NOT cut down the cherry tree, Darryl did it, he is the little boy next door".

 

[M-5]

That is privileged information.

Regarding your defense. Is a denial coming? You have confessed that being an azzhole is ok with you. I assume a denial is not forthcoming.

Your the resident " superiority complex" expert so you figure it out.

Two points to help you become all you can be:

1. When they start getting defensive and especially if they resort to insults, you are hitting them where they live.

2. Never offer a denial! Think where this country would be if George Washington said, "Dad, I did NOT cut down the cherry tree, Darryl did it, he is the little boy next door".

The cherry tree is a myth. and did not happen.

 

[herofan]

One would think you are describing quantum mechanics.

Furthermore, it is not difficult to understand that some folks have the capacity to enjoy life and find rewards in non-physical pursuits. It is not a matter that one is inferior and the other is superior.

I agree. Even M-5 wrote in an earlier post that not everyone says what they mean. That can go both ways. I always feel that the unwritten message among the busy crowd is that their way of life is superior to those who like balance and don't want to spend every awake moment with busyness; they don't just present a "to each his own" attitude. They always seem to take every opportunity to announce their busyness, and describe their way as "more driven to do and accomplish," while people who like balance are "not motivated" and "avoiding work." How else could that be interpreted?

For example, a few months back, I posted the story about the guy who fell and is now paralyzed from the waist down and how that changed his way of thinking and caused him to set some different priorities in his life. I know we often post things here that don't necessarily have a question, but it's just things we feel like sharing. I suppose I thought responses would be things like, "Sorry to hear that," or "yeah, I know someone like that too." Aside from those responses, the busy crowd felt the need to come in and tell us how they are busy all the time and how "work" is their hobby. I guess that means my friend is crazy for wanting to change his lifestyle after the accident.

Then there is this thread. It was started by someone saying they wished they had more free time. Again, here comes the busy crowd telling us that they have no free time and don't want any, and they present it with witty comments like, "oh, I'll rest when I'm dead." I don't really understand how revealing one's busyness was relevant to either of those threads. It's like when someone starts a thread and says Pizza Hut is their favorite restaurant and wants to know what everyone's favorite pizza toppings are. Then 50% of the posts are people saying they hate Pizza Hut and how another chain is waaaaay better. How is that relevant to the op other than to present a point of agitation?

One would think someone had gotten on and asked how to fake an injury so they could sit around and draw disability.
It seems like people can't understand the "balance" side of the issue. Nobody is trying to figure out how to stop feeding their cattle or how they can mow and then lie on the couch for two weeks before they bale. It's just that some people's entire existence doesn't center around busyness and just because someone isn't involved in something that looks like a job all the time doesn't mean they aren't accomplishing something. There are more things in my life that I need to feel accomplishment in than just work related things.

 

[greybeard]

I always feel that the unwritten message among the busy crowd is that their way of life is superior to those who like balance and don't want to spend every awake moment with busyness; they don't just present a "to each his own" attitude. They always seem to take every opportunity to announce their busyness, and describe their way as "more driven to do and accomplish," while people who like balance are "not motivated" and "avoiding work." How else could that be interpreted?

For example, a few months back, I posted the story about the guy who fell and is now paralyzed from the waist down and how that changed his way of thinking and caused him to set some different priorities in his life. I know we often post things here that don't necessarily have a question, but it's just things we feel like sharing. I suppose I thought responses would be things like, "Sorry to hear that," or "yeah, I know someone like that too." Aside from those responses, the busy crowd felt the need to come in and tell us how they are busy all the time and how "work" is their hobby. I guess that means my friend is crazy for wanting to change his lifestyle after the accident.

There is often a presumption,that the rest of the world is just like we are.
As someone once told me........Don't believe everything you think..

 

[herofan]

greybeard, I'm curious; how do you build or maintain relationships in your life with your schedule, or is that secondary to work? I've mentioned the enjoyment of spending time with my family as one thing I get enjoyment from. My parents are in their 80s and not in the best of health, and my daughter is away at college, so if I couldn't spend time with them unless it revolved around a chore, I'd be out of luck.

You mentioned that you stopped going to your sisters to do things for them because they liked to sit and talk. I don't know the entire story there, but did you ever think that maybe they liked you and maybe talking to their brother was a highlight? I'm sure they didn't feel very special if you couldn't socialize with them unless work was involved.

 

[Bright Raven]

greybeard, I'm curious; how do you build or maintain relationships in your life with your schedule, or is that secondary to work? I've mentioned the enjoyment of spending time with my family as one thing I get enjoyment from. My parents are in their 80s and not in the best of health, and my daughter is away at college, so if I couldn't spend time with them unless it revolved around a chore, I'd be out of luck.

You mentioned that you stopped going to your sisters to do things for them because they liked to sit and talk. I don't know the entire story there, but did you ever think that maybe they liked you and maybe talking to their brother was a highlight? I'm sure they didn't feel very special if you couldn't socialize with them unless work was involved.

I am guilty of being too goal oriented. I don't visit my friends and siblings like I should. I carry a guilt burden for that.

I moved back to Kentucky in 2010. I was here off and on for a year before that. I have a lifelong friend that lives only an hour and a half from here and I have only visited him about once a year.

I know when I am sitting in a nursing home some day - those missed relationships are going to be heavy burdens.

 

[herofan]

I know when I am sitting in a nursing home some day - those missed relationships are going to be heavy burdens.

I look at it from that perspective too. I figure if I live to be old and am sitting in a nursing home, what am I going to wish I had or hadn't done? What will seem important then?

 

[M-5]

Prov 10:5
Prov 13:4

 

[herofan]

Prov 10:5
Prov 13:4

I agree 100%. I'm not a sluggard and never slept through a harvest, at least not naturally. I'm sure I've been guilty of it spiritually a few times.

 

[herofan]

Prov 10:5
Prov 13:4

How do you interpret these, just to list a very few?

Proverbs 23:4
Mathew 6:24
Exodus 20:10

If any had said the reason they were busy all the time is because they were trying to do more of work of the Lord, I probably couldn't have done much but hang my head. To be honest, if I were really doing God's work like I should, I'm sure I'd be working even less on my own activities.

 

[bball]

Prov 10:5
Prov 13:4

How do you interpret these, just to list a very few?

Proverbs 23:4
Mathew 6:24
Exodus 20:10

If any had said the reason they were busy all the time is because they were trying to do more of work of the Lord, I probably couldn't have done much but hang my head. To be honest, if I were really doing God's work like I should, I'm sure I'd be working even less on my own activities.

Made me think of Bigfoot there! A man walking the walk, not talking the talk.

 

[M-5]

You assume it's about the money. Work ethic applies to both a person sets an example for the people around him or her. I'm sure you've heard that your testimony is seen before you tell it.

 

[herofan]

You assume it's about the money. Work ethic applies to both a person sets an example for the people around him or her. I'm sure you've heard that your testimony is seen before you tell it.

Again, I agree. It's similar to the statement that people preach their own funerals while they are alive by how they live their life. I guess we just see it differently. Why would I want to set an example to others that there is nothing to life except work? I've been told several times in my life, as I'm sure many others have, that something I did helped them mentally or spiritually. It has always had something to do with a relationship or an act of kindness. Never have I had someone say I lifted their spirits or led them down the right path because they always saw me working in my fields or passing with a load of cattle. If the only thing people can say about me when I'm gone is that I worked a lot, I missed the mark somewhere.

 

[littletom]

For the next couple months i have zero. We are harvesting tobacco after that very little. What little i have i like to go hunting. I hope to have more time if i get old.

 

[greybeard]

greybeard, I'm curious; how do you build or maintain relationships in your life with your schedule, or is that secondary to work? I've mentioned the enjoyment of spending time with my family as one thing I get enjoyment from. My parents are in their 80s and not in the best of health, and my daughter is away at college, so if I couldn't spend time with them unless it revolved around a chore, I'd be out of luck.

build relationships....I'll be blunt. I just don't give a crap what anyone but my wife thinks of me. I don't care one bit if I'm liked, disliked or otherwise. I try hard not to offend people, but if they take offense, well, that's on them.

You mentioned that you stopped going to your sisters to do things for them because they liked to sit and talk. I don't know the entire story there, but did you ever think that maybe they liked you and maybe talking to their brother was a highlight? I'm sure they didn't feel very special if you couldn't socialize with them unless work was involved

Of course they like it...it gets them out of doing things.
I love my sisters dearly, but I don't always like them. It's not just me they want to sit around and malinger with. There's a time for play and a time for everything else and if they (and their husbands) would spend less time jawin and more time actually doing something constructive, I wouldn't have be over there doing their work.

 

[ga.prime]

If I had any free time, I'd watch Hungarian TV shows and try to pick up the language.

 

[Bright Raven]

For the next couple months i have zero. We are harvesting tobacco after that very little. What little i have i like to go hunting. I hope to have more time if i get old.

If you get old?

Littletom, you will get old fast as a tobacco farmer. My dad did it from 1948 until the buy out. It wore him out but he lived to be 92.

 

[greybeard]

If a person doesn't 'get old' then none of this will matter anyway.
Within 2 generations, our faces will be gone from memory, our words (for most of us ) gone before that.

 

[Boot Jack Bulls]

If a person doesn't 'get old' then none of this will matter anyway.
Within 2 generations, our faces will be gone from memory, our words (for most of us ) gone before that.

This is why every second I can manage of free time is spent with my daughter. When I am gone, the memories she has of me will be all that remains. When I am not at my "day job" or sleeping, she is likely by my side, not out out necessity. Free time is running to get groceries, worming cattle, trimming horses and watching the dogs chase bunnies in the yard at sunset...we do all of it as a family.

 

[herofan]

build relationships....I'll be blunt. I just don't give a crap what anyone but my wife thinks of me. I don't care one bit if I'm liked, disliked or otherwise. I try hard not to offend people, but if they take offense, well, that's on them.

Thanks for sharing. That certainly helps clarify. If I didn't have relationships I wanted to cultivate and people I wanted to spend time with, and things that interested me besides work, that would certainly be a block of time for doing other things. I guess if you don't care what people think of you, you probably aren't involved in many social activities, so I guess that is a block of time you can do something else, and I guess work fills that for you. Then M-5 doesn't seem to care that some feel he is a butt, so I guess the same may apply with him.

I don't mean any of those comments in a smart-butt way, I'm just acknowledging what was written and truly saying that it helps clarify for me. Honestly, I can relate to a point. I'm an introvert personality, and I'm not crazy about a lot of people either, but I do have a few people close to me that I really want to spend time with, and I like them so much that I often do what they want to do while we spend time together; it's not all centered around a work chore. I consider cultivating those relationships just as important as cultivating the back forty.

I often say I could do anything if I had to. If I were living back during the depression, I'm sure my views and actions would be much different than today. As long as I have a choice, however, I like a little variety in life. I would get tired of the same old thing all the time. If the only thing I ever did was wake up and go be around cows from sunup to sundown, that would get monotonous if the cycle was never broken. I feel satisfaction with the fact that I have kept my grandfather's farm in good shape. I also feel satisfaction in the fact that I have helped kids over the years have a better life. I also feel satisfaction in the fact that my children seem to be logical people and seem to be moving in the right direction in life, and I'm glad I spent time with them doing some fun things they wanted to do when they were growing up and it didn't all center around a chore. I also sing in a local band; I feel satisfaction that I can just have some good old fashioned fun like that from time to time.

Of course they like it...it gets them out of doing things.
I love my sisters dearly, but I don't always like them. It's not just me they want to sit around and malinger with. There's a time for play and a time for everything else and if they (and their husbands) would spend less time jawin and more time actually doing something constructive, I wouldn't have be over there doing their work.

Like I wrote, I didn't know the whole story, but I can certainly see where that would be frustrating. Having to do work for them that they could do if they would just get up and do it would not be fun. I get that.