The Truth About Online Groups

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chippie

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How many group members does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

Fourteen to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

Seven to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

Seven more to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.

Three to correct spelling/grammar errors.

Six to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb".

Another six to condemn those six as stupid.

Fifteen to claim experience in the lighting industry and give the correct spelling.

Nineteen to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take
this discussion to a lightbulb (or light bulb) forum.

Eleven to defend the posting to the group saying that we all use light bulbs
And therefore the posts are relevant to this group.

Thirty six to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior,
Where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty.

Seven to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs.

Four to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL.

Three to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group.

Thirteen to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too".

Five to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.

Four to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

Thirteen to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs."

Three to tell a funny story about their dog and a light bulb.

AND

One group lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now with something unrelated and start it all over again.
 
lolol.gif

Then the discussion moves to watts and Amps and the
shithitsfan.gif
all over again!
SL
 
My problem is identifying exactly which of the subgroups I can best fit into.


Oh heck ....I will just post in all of em.

What color or tint was the replacement light bulb? Soft white? Regular? flourescent with Mercury? of LED?
 
You can make a bulb with a burned filament work??

I just change them. With standard bulbs. Because electrical surges kill the expensive low energy use ones.
 
How about a poster that is repeatedly, even routinely banned, and reappears every new moon? I think it could happen even on other forums? :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana:
 
Q: How many Baltimore Mayors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to assure everyone that everything possible is being done while
the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
======


they get better...


======
Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the
experience.
======
Q: How many Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, one to do it and a priest to hear him confess and give the old bulb
last rites.
======
Q: How many Christians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three, but they're really one.
======
Q: How many Communists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One, but it takes him about 30 years to realize that the old one has
burnt out.
======
Q: How many Liberals does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
======
Q: How many Consultants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: We don't know. They never get past the feasibility study.
======
Q: How many Cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. It turned itself in.
======
Q: How many Doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation
specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.
======
Q: How many Economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.
A: None. The darkness will cause the light bulb to change by itself.
A: None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself
in.
======
Q: How many Feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 100-one to do it and the other 99 to say that the bulb screwer does not
represent mainstream feminism in doing so.
======
Q: How many firefighters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three-one to do it and two to cut a hole through the roof.
======
Q: How many Folk musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Four - One to change the bulb, and three to sing about how good the old
one was.
======
Q: How many Goths does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They sit in the dark.
======
Q: How many Gun control advocates does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: They don't do that; they pass laws against burned-out bulbs, and then
they wonder why it's still so dark. Meanwhile, a lot of people get hurt
because they can't see.
======
Q: How many Hamsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, but they have to be very small. (do ya get it! Pats favorite.)
======
Q: How many hardware engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, they just have marketing sell the burnt-out bulb as a feature.
======
Q: How many investment brokers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell
it before it crashes.
======
Q: How many Jewish Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: What? And wreck my nails?
======
Q: How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three, one to call the cleaning lady and two to feel guilty about it.
======
Q: How many Ku Klux Klansmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One hundred-one to do it and the others to stand around solemnly and
watch the old bulb burn.
======
Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, lawyers only screw us.
======
Q: How many Mimes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Mimes only pretend to change the bulb.
======
Q: How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it a
surprising twist at the end.
======
Q: How many Philosophers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Why does it need changing?
======
Q: How many poets does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, one to curse the darkness and one to light a candle.
======
Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one. But it takes a long time, and the bulb has to really want to
change.
======
Q: How many psychoanalysts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: How many do *you* think it takes?
======
Q: How many Quantum Mechanicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: They can't. If they know where the socket is, they cannot locate the new
bulb.
======
Q: How many Real Men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark
======
Q: How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, we only screw the poor.
======
Q: How many Schizophreniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Both of us
======
Q: How many Social workers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, they just write a book called "Coping with Darkness".
======
Q: How many surgeons does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They would wait for a suitable doner and do a filament transplant.
 
You missed one.

How many computer programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It can't be done. That's a hardware problem.
 

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