greybeard
Well-known member
I kinda liked HD's better........JMJ Farms":2wzyb3a9 said:
Daily Joke
- Thread starter slick4591
- Start date
Help Support CattleToday:
Classic and simplified problem solving!
Subject: Psychiatrist vs. Bartender
Guy goes to a psychiatrist and says:
"I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared and I think I'm going crazy.
"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears."
"How much do you charge?"
"Eighty dollars per visit," said the doctor.
"I'll sleep on it," said the guy.
Six months later the psychiatrist met the guy on the street and asked, "Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?"
"Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480. A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup truck."
"is that so?" he said with a bit of an attitude, "And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?"
"He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now."
FORGET THE SHRINKS....HAVE A DRINK....& TALK TO A BARTENDER!
IT'S ALWAYS BETTER TO GET A SECOND OPINION.
Subject: Psychiatrist vs. Bartender
Guy goes to a psychiatrist and says:
"I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared and I think I'm going crazy.
"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears."
"How much do you charge?"
"Eighty dollars per visit," said the doctor.
"I'll sleep on it," said the guy.
Six months later the psychiatrist met the guy on the street and asked, "Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?"
"Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480. A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup truck."
"is that so?" he said with a bit of an attitude, "And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?"
"He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now."
FORGET THE SHRINKS....HAVE A DRINK....& TALK TO A BARTENDER!
IT'S ALWAYS BETTER TO GET A SECOND OPINION.
TexasBred
Well-known member
A married couple rushed to the hospital because the woman was in labor the doctor asked the couple, "I have invented a new machine that you might want to try, it takes some of the labor pains away from the mother and gives it to the father."
So the married couple decided that they would try this. The doctor hooked the machine up and put it on 10% of pain switched from the mother to the father and the husband said "I feel okay turn it up a lot more."
So the doctor turned it up to 50% and the husband said "Why don't you just put it all on me cause I'm not feeling a thing."
The doctor warned them, "This much could kill you if you're not prepared," and the husband replied "I'm ready."
So the doctor turned the machine up to 100% but the husband didn't feel a thing so they went home happy with a pain free labor and delivery
When they got home the mailman was dead on the front porch!
So the married couple decided that they would try this. The doctor hooked the machine up and put it on 10% of pain switched from the mother to the father and the husband said "I feel okay turn it up a lot more."
So the doctor turned it up to 50% and the husband said "Why don't you just put it all on me cause I'm not feeling a thing."
The doctor warned them, "This much could kill you if you're not prepared," and the husband replied "I'm ready."
So the doctor turned the machine up to 100% but the husband didn't feel a thing so they went home happy with a pain free labor and delivery
When they got home the mailman was dead on the front porch!
OP
OP
slick4591
Well-known member
First known picture of Michael Phelps.
Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day.
As they walk, they come across a sign: "Beauty contest for the most
beautiful woman in the world.
"I'm entering" said Snow White.
After half an hour she comes out and they ask her; "Well, how'd ya do?"
" First Place," said Snow White.
They continue walking and they see a sign: "Contest for the
strongest man in the world."
"I'm entering," says Superman.
After half an hour he returns and they ask him, "How did you make out?"
" First Place," answers Superman. "Did you ever doubt?"
They continue walking when they see a sign: "Contest! Who is the
greatest liar in the world?"
Pinocchio says "this is mine."
Half an hour later, he returns with tears in his eyes.
"What happened?" they asked.
"Who the heck is Hillary Clinton?" asked Pinocchio
As they walk, they come across a sign: "Beauty contest for the most
beautiful woman in the world.
"I'm entering" said Snow White.
After half an hour she comes out and they ask her; "Well, how'd ya do?"
" First Place," said Snow White.
They continue walking and they see a sign: "Contest for the
strongest man in the world."
"I'm entering," says Superman.
After half an hour he returns and they ask him, "How did you make out?"
" First Place," answers Superman. "Did you ever doubt?"
They continue walking when they see a sign: "Contest! Who is the
greatest liar in the world?"
Pinocchio says "this is mine."
Half an hour later, he returns with tears in his eyes.
"What happened?" they asked.
"Who the heck is Hillary Clinton?" asked Pinocchio
TexasBred
Well-known member
Boudreaux from Thibodeaux
The Louisiana State Police had received numerous reports of illegal cock fighting being held in the area around Abbeville and had sent their famous Detective Boudreaux from Thibodeaux to investigate. Boudreaux promptly began his investigation and then reported to his Commander the next morning.
"Dey is tree main groups involve in dis rooster Fightin", he began.
"Good work! Who are they?" the Commander asked.
Boudreaux replied confidently, "De Texas Aggies, de local Cajuns, and de Demcratic Natnal Char from N'awlins".
Puzzled, the Commander asked, "Now Boudreaux, how did you find all that out in one night?"
"Well," he replied, "I went down and done seen dat rooster fight in person. And I knowed immediately dat dem Aggies was involved when a Duck was entered in the fight."
The Commander nodded, "I'll buy that. But what about the others?"
Boudreaux nodded knowingly, "Well, I knowed de Cajuns was involved when sumbody bet on de duck!"
"Ah, I see, I see ... " sighed the sergeant, "And how did you figure the DNC was involved?"
"De duck won!"
The Louisiana State Police had received numerous reports of illegal cock fighting being held in the area around Abbeville and had sent their famous Detective Boudreaux from Thibodeaux to investigate. Boudreaux promptly began his investigation and then reported to his Commander the next morning.
"Dey is tree main groups involve in dis rooster Fightin", he began.
"Good work! Who are they?" the Commander asked.
Boudreaux replied confidently, "De Texas Aggies, de local Cajuns, and de Demcratic Natnal Char from N'awlins".
Puzzled, the Commander asked, "Now Boudreaux, how did you find all that out in one night?"
"Well," he replied, "I went down and done seen dat rooster fight in person. And I knowed immediately dat dem Aggies was involved when a Duck was entered in the fight."
The Commander nodded, "I'll buy that. But what about the others?"
Boudreaux nodded knowingly, "Well, I knowed de Cajuns was involved when sumbody bet on de duck!"
"Ah, I see, I see ... " sighed the sergeant, "And how did you figure the DNC was involved?"
"De duck won!"
OP
OP
slick4591
Well-known member
:lol:
TB,
I've got one for you and I won't use your hometown! Lol
I've got one for you and I won't use your hometown! Lol
BAGPIPE Funeral
Time is like a river. You cannot touch the water twice, because the flow
that has passed will never pass again. Enjoy every moment of life. As a
bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to
play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or
friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the South West
of Western Australia.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods of the South West, I got lost and,
being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone
and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew
left and they were eating lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men
for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the
vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I
started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played
out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played
like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played "Amazing Grace", the workers began to weep. They wept, I
wept, we all wept together. When I finished, I packed up my bagpipes and
started for my car. Though my head was hung low, my heart was full.
As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never
seen anything like that before, and I've been putting in septic tanks for
twenty years."
Apparently, I'm still lost....it's a man thing.
When you have stopped laughing be sure to forward this on to others who
would enjoy a good story.
Time is like a river. You cannot touch the water twice, because the flow
that has passed will never pass again. Enjoy every moment of life. As a
bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to
play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or
friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the South West
of Western Australia.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods of the South West, I got lost and,
being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone
and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew
left and they were eating lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men
for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the
vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I
started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played
out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played
like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played "Amazing Grace", the workers began to weep. They wept, I
wept, we all wept together. When I finished, I packed up my bagpipes and
started for my car. Though my head was hung low, my heart was full.
As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never
seen anything like that before, and I've been putting in septic tanks for
twenty years."
Apparently, I'm still lost....it's a man thing.
When you have stopped laughing be sure to forward this on to others who
would enjoy a good story.
TexasBred
Well-known member
:lol: :lol: :clap: :clap: :lol2: :lol2: I can see that happening around here.bbirder":3909kg8y said:
Life long friends have a high-fenced hunting ranch, but started having trouble with unauthorized access through the front gate.
They hire a 60-year old gentleman Jose Senior to keep an eye on things.
Mid-way through the deer season, all the guys are at the ranch and the wives are coming down for a night on the town. A nice steak dinner in town, a little drinking, little dancing. They let Jose know to be on the look out for the ladies and to escort them to the camp house once they show up.
About 8:00 p.m., the wives roll up in an Escalade, and man are they dressed up. Evening gowns, high heels, make-up, big hair….. Looking like a million bucks. They all get out of the car and start to walk up to Jose's trailer.
Jose comes running out of the tralier, waving his arms and yelling in Spanish… one of the wives gets him calmed down and asks him to speak english, none of them understand Spanish….
Jose slows down, catches his breath and starts shaking his head,…. "No, no no…… no hookers tonight, the wives, they are coming ………"
They hire a 60-year old gentleman Jose Senior to keep an eye on things.
Mid-way through the deer season, all the guys are at the ranch and the wives are coming down for a night on the town. A nice steak dinner in town, a little drinking, little dancing. They let Jose know to be on the look out for the ladies and to escort them to the camp house once they show up.
About 8:00 p.m., the wives roll up in an Escalade, and man are they dressed up. Evening gowns, high heels, make-up, big hair….. Looking like a million bucks. They all get out of the car and start to walk up to Jose's trailer.
Jose comes running out of the tralier, waving his arms and yelling in Spanish… one of the wives gets him calmed down and asks him to speak english, none of them understand Spanish….
Jose slows down, catches his breath and starts shaking his head,…. "No, no no…… no hookers tonight, the wives, they are coming ………"
TexasBred
Well-known member
Three Hillbillies are sitting on a porch shootin' the breeze.
1st Hillbilly says: 'My wife sure is stupid!...She bought an air conditioner. '
2nd Hillbilly says: 'Why is that stupid?'
1st Hillbilly says: 'We ain't got no 'lectricity!'
2nd Hillbilly says: 'That's nothin'! My wife is so stupid, she bought one of them new fangled warshin ' machines!'
1st Hillbilly says: 'Why is that so stupid?'
2nd Hillbilly says: ''Cause we ain't got no plummin'!'
3rd Hillbilly says: 'That ain't nuthin'! My wife is dumber than both yer wifes put together! I was going through her purse the other day lookin' fer some change, and I found 6 condoms in thar.'
1st and 2nd Hillbillies say: 'Well, what's so dumb about that?'
3rd Hillbilly says: 'She ain't got no pecker.
1st Hillbilly says: 'My wife sure is stupid!...She bought an air conditioner. '
2nd Hillbilly says: 'Why is that stupid?'
1st Hillbilly says: 'We ain't got no 'lectricity!'
2nd Hillbilly says: 'That's nothin'! My wife is so stupid, she bought one of them new fangled warshin ' machines!'
1st Hillbilly says: 'Why is that so stupid?'
2nd Hillbilly says: ''Cause we ain't got no plummin'!'
3rd Hillbilly says: 'That ain't nuthin'! My wife is dumber than both yer wifes put together! I was going through her purse the other day lookin' fer some change, and I found 6 condoms in thar.'
1st and 2nd Hillbillies say: 'Well, what's so dumb about that?'
3rd Hillbilly says: 'She ain't got no pecker.
JMJ Farms
Well-known member
:lol: :lol: :lol: :clap: :clap: :clap:
TexasBred
Well-known member
TEL AVIV, Israel -
The Israelis are developing an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners. It's an armored booth you step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on your person.
Israel sees this as a win-win situation for everyone, with none of this crap about racial profiling. It will also eliminates
the costs of long and expensive trials.
You're in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter, an announcement: "Attention to all standby passengers, El Al is pleased to announce a seat available on flight 670 to London . Shalom!"
BRILLIANT !!!
The Israelis are developing an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners. It's an armored booth you step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on your person.
Israel sees this as a win-win situation for everyone, with none of this crap about racial profiling. It will also eliminates
the costs of long and expensive trials.
You're in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter, an announcement: "Attention to all standby passengers, El Al is pleased to announce a seat available on flight 670 to London . Shalom!"
BRILLIANT !!!
A Virgin
In a tiny village in southern Ontario lived an old lady, a virgin, and very proud of it.
Sensing that her final days were rapidly approaching, and desiring to make sure everything was in proper order when she dies, she went to the town's undertaker (who also happened to be the local postal clerk) to make proper "final" arrangements. As a last wish, she informed the undertaker that she wanted the following inscription engraved on her tombstone: "BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED AS A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN"
Not long after, the old maid died peacefully. A few days after the funeral, as the undertaker/postal clerk went to prepare the tombstone that the lady had requested, it became quite apparent that the tombstone she had selected was much too small for the wording that she had chosen.
He thought long and hard about how he could fulfill the old maid's final request considering the very limited space available on the small piece of stone. For days, he agonized over the dilemma, but finally his experience as a postal worker allowed him to come up with what he thought was the appropriate solution to the problem.
The virgin's tombstone was finally completed and duly engraved, and it read as follows:
"RETURNED UNOPENED"
In a tiny village in southern Ontario lived an old lady, a virgin, and very proud of it.
Sensing that her final days were rapidly approaching, and desiring to make sure everything was in proper order when she dies, she went to the town's undertaker (who also happened to be the local postal clerk) to make proper "final" arrangements. As a last wish, she informed the undertaker that she wanted the following inscription engraved on her tombstone: "BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED AS A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN"
Not long after, the old maid died peacefully. A few days after the funeral, as the undertaker/postal clerk went to prepare the tombstone that the lady had requested, it became quite apparent that the tombstone she had selected was much too small for the wording that she had chosen.
He thought long and hard about how he could fulfill the old maid's final request considering the very limited space available on the small piece of stone. For days, he agonized over the dilemma, but finally his experience as a postal worker allowed him to come up with what he thought was the appropriate solution to the problem.
The virgin's tombstone was finally completed and duly engraved, and it read as follows:
"RETURNED UNOPENED"
TexasBred
Well-known member
HILLARY CLINTON GOES TO A GIFTED-STUDENT PRIMARY SCHOOL IN NEW YORK TO TALK ABOUT THE WORLD.
AFTER HER TALK SHE OFFERS QUESTION TIME.
ONE LITTLE BOY PUTS UP HIS HAND. HILLARY ASKS HIM WHAT HIS NAME IS.
"KENNETH," HE SAYS.
"AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION, KENNETH ?" SHE ASKS.
"I HAVE THREE QUESTIONS," HE SAYS.
"FIRST -- WHATEVER HAPPENED IN BENGHAZI ?
"SECOND -- WHY WOULD YOU RUN FOR PRESIDENT IF YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF HANDLING TWO E-MAIL ACCOUNTS ?
"AND, THIRD -- WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE MISSING SIX BILLION DOLLARS WHILE YOU WERE SECRETARY OF STATE ?"
JUST THEN THE BELL RINGS FOR RECESS.
HILLARY INFORMS THE KIDDIES THAT THEY WILL CONTINUE AFTER RECESS.
WHEN THEY RESUME HILLARY SAYS,
"OKAY, WHERE WERE WE ? OH, THAT'S RIGHT, QUESTION TIME.
WHO HAS A QUESTION ?"
A DIFFERENT BOY -- LITTLE JOHNNY -- PUTS HIS HAND UP.
HILLARY POINTS TO HIM AND ASKS HIM WHAT HIS NAME IS.
"JOHNNY," HE SAYS.
"AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION, JOHNNY ?" SHE ASKS.
"I HAVE FIVE QUESTIONS," HE SAYS.
"FIRST -- WHATEVER HAPPENED IN BENGHAZI ?
"SECOND -- WHY WOULD YOU RUN FOR PRESIDENT IF YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF HANDLING TWO E-MAIL ACCOUNTS ?
"THIRD -- WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE MISSING SIX BILLION DOLLARS WHILE YOU WERE SECRETARY OF STATE ?
"FOURTH -- WHY DID THE RECESS BELL GO OFF 20 MINUTES EARLY ?
"AND, FIFTH -- WHERE'S KENNETH ?"
AFTER HER TALK SHE OFFERS QUESTION TIME.
ONE LITTLE BOY PUTS UP HIS HAND. HILLARY ASKS HIM WHAT HIS NAME IS.
"KENNETH," HE SAYS.
"AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION, KENNETH ?" SHE ASKS.
"I HAVE THREE QUESTIONS," HE SAYS.
"FIRST -- WHATEVER HAPPENED IN BENGHAZI ?
"SECOND -- WHY WOULD YOU RUN FOR PRESIDENT IF YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF HANDLING TWO E-MAIL ACCOUNTS ?
"AND, THIRD -- WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE MISSING SIX BILLION DOLLARS WHILE YOU WERE SECRETARY OF STATE ?"
JUST THEN THE BELL RINGS FOR RECESS.
HILLARY INFORMS THE KIDDIES THAT THEY WILL CONTINUE AFTER RECESS.
WHEN THEY RESUME HILLARY SAYS,
"OKAY, WHERE WERE WE ? OH, THAT'S RIGHT, QUESTION TIME.
WHO HAS A QUESTION ?"
A DIFFERENT BOY -- LITTLE JOHNNY -- PUTS HIS HAND UP.
HILLARY POINTS TO HIM AND ASKS HIM WHAT HIS NAME IS.
"JOHNNY," HE SAYS.
"AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION, JOHNNY ?" SHE ASKS.
"I HAVE FIVE QUESTIONS," HE SAYS.
"FIRST -- WHATEVER HAPPENED IN BENGHAZI ?
"SECOND -- WHY WOULD YOU RUN FOR PRESIDENT IF YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF HANDLING TWO E-MAIL ACCOUNTS ?
"THIRD -- WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE MISSING SIX BILLION DOLLARS WHILE YOU WERE SECRETARY OF STATE ?
"FOURTH -- WHY DID THE RECESS BELL GO OFF 20 MINUTES EARLY ?
"AND, FIFTH -- WHERE'S KENNETH ?"
D2Cat
Well-known member
Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home!
Sheriff: Height?
Husband: Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sheriff: Weight?
Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sheriff: Color of eyes?
Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sheriff: Color of hair?
Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.
Sheriff: What was she wearing?
Husband: Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sheriff: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.
Sheriff: What kind of truck was it?
Husband:A 2016 pearl white Ram Limited 4X4 with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, back up and front camera, Moose hide leather heated and cooled seats, climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch, sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB port, and 4 power outlets. Walnut gun rack with my customized 12 gauge and a gold plated Winchester 30-30. I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. It has custom retracting running boards and underglow wheel well lighting...
At this point the husband started choking up.
Sheriff: Take it easy sir, we'll find your truck.!
Sheriff: Height?
Husband: Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sheriff: Weight?
Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sheriff: Color of eyes?
Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sheriff: Color of hair?
Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.
Sheriff: What was she wearing?
Husband: Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sheriff: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.
Sheriff: What kind of truck was it?
Husband:A 2016 pearl white Ram Limited 4X4 with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, back up and front camera, Moose hide leather heated and cooled seats, climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch, sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB port, and 4 power outlets. Walnut gun rack with my customized 12 gauge and a gold plated Winchester 30-30. I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. It has custom retracting running boards and underglow wheel well lighting...
At this point the husband started choking up.
Sheriff: Take it easy sir, we'll find your truck.!
TexasBred
Well-known member
Bill Clinton gets a call from the police telling him that his house had been robbed. The offenders had also consumed all the beer in his refrigerator and had raped his wife. A moment of silence passed, then Bill said, "I can't believe they had sex with my wife after only six beers!"
ez14
Well-known member
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :clap: :clap: to both of you
OP
OP
slick4591
Well-known member
My New Ford Truck
Nothing like a Ford Truck built by a company we didn't bail out... I bought a new Ford F250 Tri-Flex Fuel Truck. Go figure-- it runs on either hydrogen, gasoline, or E85.
I returned it to the dealer yesterday because I couldn't get the radio to work. The service technician explained that the radio was voice activated. "Nelson", the technician said to the radio. The radio replied, "Ricky or Willie?" "Willie!" he continued and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers. Then he said, "Ray Charles!", and in an instant " Georgia On My Mind" replaced Willie Nelson.
I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, "Beethoven", I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, "Beatles", I'd get one of their awesome songs.
Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed my new Ford truck, but I swerved in time to avoid him. I yelled, "Dumb A$$!" Immediately the radio responded with, "Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States."
Dam, I love this Ford truck....
Nothing like a Ford Truck built by a company we didn't bail out... I bought a new Ford F250 Tri-Flex Fuel Truck. Go figure-- it runs on either hydrogen, gasoline, or E85.
I returned it to the dealer yesterday because I couldn't get the radio to work. The service technician explained that the radio was voice activated. "Nelson", the technician said to the radio. The radio replied, "Ricky or Willie?" "Willie!" he continued and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers. Then he said, "Ray Charles!", and in an instant " Georgia On My Mind" replaced Willie Nelson.
I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, "Beethoven", I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, "Beatles", I'd get one of their awesome songs.
Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed my new Ford truck, but I swerved in time to avoid him. I yelled, "Dumb A$$!" Immediately the radio responded with, "Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States."
Dam, I love this Ford truck....
