GMN
Well-known member
I don't normally put this kind of stuff on here, but this past weekend upset me so much, just wondering if any of you have some suggestions on how to deal with toxic family members?
I have these family members who live in another state, their is an another family member who always encourages these people to come and visit, well these people are on state aid, they can't afford to take vacations, but the older lady enables them to be lazy and helps them out all the time, they live in a house that she bought,and are making the payments to her, when they can, they whine about being so broke but do nothing to change it-they have 5 kids-I have always had a up and down relationship with them for various reasons-Anyways this older lady let them skip their house payment, to help them get their kids ready for school, but instead they spent the money to come here to visit-They arrived last Thursday, Friday the older lady was to occupy them for the day-but she could not handle them at her house so she sent them to my house. i and my son were the only ones here so we had to deal with them. In hindsight i should have just asked them to leave-but that is rude-anyways they all went in the pool created mega chaos there, then took off running in our yard by the calves in the barn all over, it was unbelievable. The Mom and dad sat by the pool letting their kids run wild, so I and my son had to chase these kids around to prevent them from getting hurt- the parents sat by the pool on their cell phones playing video games-the one boy picked up a pair of shears i had and he was going to cut my hammock strings, i stopped that, but I guess i just don;'t understand people like this-no respect for my family our personal belongings, and their attitude of just expecting people to do for them is just too much. That night I barely slept because I simply felt like I had been in a war zone!
next day another family member had a cook out, I went but left early because I just could not stand to be around these people for another day!
I find myself thinking it may be best to distance myself from the older lady for awhile i just feel that she does not have my best interests at heart and sometimes I have even wondered if she intentionally has done things to rattle me-we have had a rocky relationship for over 20 years, but for her to have done this, just makes me really wish i could just cut her from my life for good-it feels like a betrayal-to hear her say wasn't the visit fun-just makes me really wonder what the heck????
Any suggestions on dealing with toxic family members?
I have these family members who live in another state, their is an another family member who always encourages these people to come and visit, well these people are on state aid, they can't afford to take vacations, but the older lady enables them to be lazy and helps them out all the time, they live in a house that she bought,and are making the payments to her, when they can, they whine about being so broke but do nothing to change it-they have 5 kids-I have always had a up and down relationship with them for various reasons-Anyways this older lady let them skip their house payment, to help them get their kids ready for school, but instead they spent the money to come here to visit-They arrived last Thursday, Friday the older lady was to occupy them for the day-but she could not handle them at her house so she sent them to my house. i and my son were the only ones here so we had to deal with them. In hindsight i should have just asked them to leave-but that is rude-anyways they all went in the pool created mega chaos there, then took off running in our yard by the calves in the barn all over, it was unbelievable. The Mom and dad sat by the pool letting their kids run wild, so I and my son had to chase these kids around to prevent them from getting hurt- the parents sat by the pool on their cell phones playing video games-the one boy picked up a pair of shears i had and he was going to cut my hammock strings, i stopped that, but I guess i just don;'t understand people like this-no respect for my family our personal belongings, and their attitude of just expecting people to do for them is just too much. That night I barely slept because I simply felt like I had been in a war zone!
next day another family member had a cook out, I went but left early because I just could not stand to be around these people for another day!
I find myself thinking it may be best to distance myself from the older lady for awhile i just feel that she does not have my best interests at heart and sometimes I have even wondered if she intentionally has done things to rattle me-we have had a rocky relationship for over 20 years, but for her to have done this, just makes me really wish i could just cut her from my life for good-it feels like a betrayal-to hear her say wasn't the visit fun-just makes me really wonder what the heck????
Any suggestions on dealing with toxic family members?