Its sad

[gimpyrancher]

Your feelings are all well and good but have you ever taken action and tried to help those affected by travesties like this? So many do a good job talking but do nothing. When you take action you get close to those involved and at times it will make you angry and make you hate the decisions that lead someone to the gutter hurting those closest to them but it has its own rewards to.

I've lived a life of helping others. Your feelings don't escape my own history.

Born and raised in CA. Born in San Fernando Valley back when it was all orchards. Moved to get away from what became a big city with a lot of downtrodden to a fairly small city in northern CA (Sacramento) in 1983. It also exploded into a huge place with a lot of downtrodden and all the trappings of being CA. Plus I was a professional in the healthcare industry and a respected republican until a physical disability took my professional life away. That is when I learned a few hidden things about life I never knew before. So in 2012 I moved to a small town in South Central Oregon with a county of 25k people (and a county being larger than Maine). A place where guns are not necessarily feared or unusual. Much better for lifestyle but with the world economy and the country's economy being what it has become, it still has it's downfall. The poor and downtrodden are still a major issue. Just on a smaller scale. The poorest county in the state. So thank God I previously bought a large chunk of land on a private road/easement with only about 6 local residents, none that have a postal address on their property. That is a community that I can help with. That is a community I can influence. That is a community I can share with. That is also a community I will not be overwhelmed by.

I just want to live the honest, healthy prosperous middle class life I enjoyed growing up. Long before politicians and politics took all of the best of the country away from us and sent our jobs overseas. :hide:

 

[Jogeephus]

So you run and hide and cast stones at those who have feelings and try and help others. Pretty ingenious way of living for someone who is self centered - if you can call that living.

 

[dun]

People falling on hard times is sad, but what I find sadder is what is happening with a friend of ours. They come out every other year to turkey hunt, they'll be leaving in the morning after 2 1/2 weeks stay. The husbad isn;t all that old, 71, had a very succesfull career as an engineer. He is losing his memory. He came down with my wife to the hay field I was cutting in and came through a gate. A half hour later he was coming down to see me and couldn;t remember where the gate was. He passed right by it and didn;t recognize it as the gate he had been through just a few minutes before. I have a feeling this will be their last visit. At least he isn;t in the mode of retelling the same story over and over without realizing it. The bright spot is he did get a turkey this year.
He knows he forgets things but doesn;t realize how much he forgets.

 

[Jogeephus]

Dementia is a bad deal. My wife and I have been dealing with this with her mother. One minute she's sharp as a tack the next she is claiming dead people are in her home or she sets about to fry chicken only to forget and leave the grease on the burner.

She refuses to go to an assisted living home. I had to "child proof" her home to keep her from hurting herself or burning the house down. Have hired round the clock sitters for her but when she gets clear minded she sends them walking only to slip back in her muddled world. We can't NOT have someone with her but she can be rambunctious. Its been far from pleasant.

 

[TexasBred]

I just want to live the honest, healthy prosperous middle class life I enjoyed growing up. Long before politicians and politics took all of the best of the country away from us and sent our jobs overseas. :hide:

And here goes the blame game. How did "outsourcing" affect you being a professional in the medical field?? Big decrease in the workman's comp cases??

 

[MO_cows]

Addiction is an ugly, scary thing. An uncle of mine was a functioning alcoholic for years, then he got sober at middle age. Later in his life, his "addiction gene" showed up again and he had a problem with gambling. A wonderful guy otherwise, he just had some kind of weakness in him.

 

[MO_cows]

Dementia is a bad deal. My wife and I have been dealing with this with her mother. One minute she's sharp as a tack the next she is claiming dead people are in her home or she sets about to fry chicken only to forget and leave the grease on the burner.

She refuses to go to an assisted living home. I had to "child proof" her home to keep her from hurting herself or burning the house down. Have hired round the clock sitters for her but when she gets clear minded she sends them walking only to slip back in her muddled world. We can't NOT have someone with her but she can be rambunctious. Its been far from pleasant.

That is sad. But it seems just as sad when a person's mind stays sharp while their body deteriorates and quits on them, too. Either way it happens, aging and dying can be cruel. I'm praying for the Julia Child experience, just totter along a little slower and slower, go to sleep one night and don't wake up.

 

[Jogeephus]

Yeah, sharp mind and frail body would stink too. Have a friend who has parkinson's and we take him out to eat some and I know its got to be so frustrating to him not being able to communicate. His mind is sharp its just he has a devil of a time communicating and he loves to talk. Its draining for me to do this and I get frustrated and feel embarrassed having to ask him to repeat himself. Interestingly, when things get really bad I'll ask him to sing it and he can do that.

I want to go like Child's too.

 

[talltimber]

Every one I know is weak is some area, myself included. Some don't know there is a problem, some know and deny it.

I have my own monkeys, more than most maybe, idk. The true victims I feel sorry for. Some reap what they sow.

 

[Williamsv]

My mother has the sharp mind at 91, but her body is worn out. My sister and I looked after her at home for six years. Then she had to give in and go to assisted living for a year and a half. Now she is in the nursing home. Cannot walk a step. Body retaining fluids, low sodium, congestive heart failure, and breathing problems. Plus skin tears if she is touched
I have thought so many times lately what my good doctor friend told me years ago, that quality is better than quantity. Now I know what he meant. We lost him at 64 after battling pancreatic cancer for over six years.
My dad died suddenly at 68 on his way to get hay for the cows. I have his same type A personality and am 68 now so with all the stress I have looking after Mama and her business, farm, and cows. Plus my own things. I figure my time is short, but that is okay. Quality is better than quantity.
I still believe losing your mind is worse than your body wearing out. My prayers are with you and your wife, Jo.

 

[Dave]

Lost Mom at 60 to MS. The last four years all she could do was breath and swallow. Dad did everything else for her. Her mind was sharp but she couldn't move anything. I think I would rather lose my mind and be off in my own world than to sit there with a sharp mind but unable to move. Dad on the other hand made it to 89. He had a few health issues along the way but was active up to the end. He fell several times and caulked it up to getting old and loosing his balance. Finally took a big spill and got checked out. Turned out his hip, pelvis, etc was full of cancer. It was just giving out on him. Past exactly one month after the diagnosis.

How does the joke go? I want to die in my sleep like Grandpa, not yelling and screaming like the other people in his car.

 

[cbcr]

Losing one's mind is probably the hardest thing to see, the lights are on but no one is home.

My Grandmother had to go into the nursing home at 95. She had dementia, there was someone else in the nursing home that she knew and was from the same area that her and my Grandpa had farmed. The other person had some dementia too and when the other person and my Grandmother sometime were visiting, they both were talking back in a perfect conversation. Only it was about 60 years ago. My Grandmother lived to be 103.

Lost my Dad to lung cancer in 2001. That was extremely painful. If any good came out of that is my wife seeing what my dad went thru quit smoking. My dad was 74 and he had smoked since he was around 16, a school bus driver had got him started.

 

[I luv herfrds]

Know a really great couple. Husband has MS. When he comes in the store one of us will go to the back and grab a chair. Last time he was in his legs started to give out on him. We finished his shopping for him. Got his cart to the front and checked through and we loaded them into his truck while he paid. Then 2 of us walked out with him to make sure he got in ok. I offered to follow him home and help him get them brought in and put away but he said he had a wheel chair and a system at home that he uses. His mind is still very sharp but his body is weak.