chrisy
Well-known member
>NEW DRUGS FOR WOMEN
>
>DAMNITOL
>Take two and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to eight full hours.
>
>EMPTYNESTROGEN
>Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
>
>ST. MOMMA'S WORT
>Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering
>preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.
>
>PEPTOBIMBO
>Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.
>
>DUMBEROL
>When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.
>
>FLIPITOR
>Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
>
>MENICILLIN
>Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person.
>
>
>BUYAGRA
>Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping Increases potency,
>duration, and credit limit of spending spree.
>
>JACKASSPIRIN
>Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.
>
>ANTI-TALKSIDENT
>A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.
>
>NAGAMENT
>When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him.
>
>Now, send these to any woman who needs a good laugh,
>and any man who can handle it
>
>DAMNITOL
>Take two and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to eight full hours.
>
>EMPTYNESTROGEN
>Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
>
>ST. MOMMA'S WORT
>Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering
>preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.
>
>PEPTOBIMBO
>Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.
>
>DUMBEROL
>When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.
>
>FLIPITOR
>Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
>
>MENICILLIN
>Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person.
>
>
>BUYAGRA
>Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping Increases potency,
>duration, and credit limit of spending spree.
>
>JACKASSPIRIN
>Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.
>
>ANTI-TALKSIDENT
>A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.
>
>NAGAMENT
>When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him.
>
>Now, send these to any woman who needs a good laugh,
>and any man who can handle it
