Daily Chuckle

[Ouachita]

Easy there Earth Rider

 

[coachg]

 

[CowboyRam]

 

[greybeard]

A policeman stops a guy running with scissors.

"Hey, where are you running with those scissors?" asks the policeman.

He replies, "To the hospital; they just called and told me my mother in-law's life is hanging by a thread"

 

[branxchar&charx]

 

[Warren Allison]

 

[crossbreed]

I have a sign I'm our travel trailer. My wife and I had words….. I never got to use mine!

 

[TexasJerseyMilker]

These are T shirts I had made. The condensed whoop azz shirt has actual dirt and dried blood. A pristine and perfectly white shirt would not make sense.

 

[TexasJerseyMilker]

The true nature of guinea hens.

 

[CowboyRam]

 

[Travlr]

View attachment 41767

I want a picture of the vehicle it's riding in.

 

[Warren Allison]

 

[Warren Allison]

I know a lot of people will think I am showing off,
But when you work hard all your life you deserve to treat yourself.
White was the only color they had, but it doesn't matter.
I've just purchased these four chairs and I can't wait for summer

 

[greybeard]

View attachment 41767

don't look 10mm (10mm= just over 3/8") and don't appear to be 3/8 drive either.

 

[Ouachita]

Those kind of chairs do not like me. We aren't compatible, or maybe it's the combination with alcohol, but they were donated to Salvation Army.

 

[coachg]

I know a lot of people will think I am showing off,
But when you work hard all your life you deserve to treat yourself.
White was the only color they had, but it doesn't matter.
I've just purchased these four chairs and I can't wait for summer
View attachment 41799

Can't hide money !

 

[greybeard]

Those kind of chairs do not like me. We aren't compatible, or maybe it's the combination with alcohol, but they were donated to Salvation Army.

Whatever did the Salvation Army ever do to deserve that?

 

[Ouachita]

Whatever did the Salvation Army ever do to deserve that?

Well, I tried to give them to the local Elks Lodge, but they told me drunks couldn't keep them upright either.

 

[Travlr]

A young man met a beautiful girl in a bar and agreed to pay $500 to spend the night with her.

The night progressed as expected.

Before the man left, he told the young woman that he did not have any cash with him, but that he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment "APARTMENT RENT."

On the way to his office he regretted what he had promised, deciding that the whole event was not worth the price.

So, he had his secretary send a check for $250 and enclosed the following note:

Dear Madam,

Enclosed find check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment.

I am not sending the amount agreed upon because when I rented the apartment I was under the impression that:

• 1) it had never been occupied
• 2) that there was plenty of heat
• 3) that it was small enough to make me cozy and feel at home.

Last night, however, I found it had been previously occupied, that there was no heat, and it was entirely too large.

Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for $250 with the following note:

1. Dear Sir, first of all, I cannot understand how you expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely.
2. As for the heat, there is heat if you know how to turn it on.
3. Regarding the space, the apartment is, indeed, of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture to fill it, please don't blame the landlady!

 

[gman4691]

had to chuckle