Best headlines of 2005!

[Ryan]

I thought this was hilarious... Enjoy!!

THE YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 2005:


CRACK FOUND ON GOVERNOR'S DAUGHTER
[Imagine that!]

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[No, really?]

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers !
[ That'll stop 'em. ]

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
[Not if I wipe thoroughly!]

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
[What a guy!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[No-good-for-nothing lazy so-and-sos!]

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

War Dims Hope for Peace
[I can see where it might have that effect!]

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
[You think?]

Cold Wave! Linked to Temperatures
[Who would have thought!]

Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
[They may be on to something!]

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
[he probably IS the battery charge!]

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger
Test Group
[Weren't they fat enough?!]

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]

Local High
School Dropouts Cut In Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]

And the winner is....




Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

 

[msscamp]

:clap: :lol2: :lol2:

 

[cowspider]

:shock: :shock: :shock: :roll: :stop:

 

[warpaint]

Bravo!! :lol:

 

[WestieGirl]

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Once again my fellow employees think that I am just about the craziest person that they have ever meet...sitting at the computer laughing to myself!!!! Thanks guys!!
:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[J]

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Once again my fellow employees think that I am just about the craziest person that they have ever meet...sitting at the computer laughing to myself!!!! Thanks guys!!
:lol: :lol: :lol:

:lol: ME TOO! :lol:

Seemed like everyone in the office decided to walk past my door in the past 2 minutes. They all probably thouhgt I was finally losing it, AGAIN. ;-)

 

[Running Arrow Bill]

Thanks to all of the Newspaper Editors, Copy Writers, Proofreaders, and Reporters. Got a Journalism Degree, but failed English 101 and Copywriting 101...lol.

Note: "Spell Checkers" on computers don't exactly correct poor English and Communications...

"Here's The Sign...." ;-)

 

[Victoria]

:lol2: :lol: :lol:

 

[chrisy]

Thanks to all of the Newspaper Editors, Copy Writers, Proofreaders, and Reporters. Got a Journalism Degree, but failed English 101 and Copywriting 101...lol.

Note: "Spell Checkers" on computers don't exactly correct poor English and Communications...

"Here's The Sign...." ;-)

I live here in England and bought an American computer (nothing wrong with British, but liked the speck on this one) and when I go to spell check it is in American English, so for me over here I still can't get right spelling, need a dictionary. :x
as for editorials :lol: :lol: :lol: