you cant pick your family .. but you can write em off

[brownmule]

no matter how bad you think your family is i got you beat!!!
got a dead beat low life father..thats a page in it self.. thank god for my grandparents who raise me.. i have none of the evil genes..LOL my full brother called out of the blue a few months ago wanting to come back here for a while.. he was in fla w my other sisiter.. he said hed help us on the farm build fence,, i shouldnt have to be down there by my self working w doug was at work ( which i dont not mind at all..i do alot of stuff by my self and i need the solitude some times) well any way he came to live w us.. things went good for about month or two.. then he real him came out he reminded me of our father some times i wanted to smother him in his sleep LOL he turned out to be a con and a player.. he work very little on the farm the post driver kicked his butt put in 4 t post and whined like a little girl.. from then on he made excuses about not comming w us to the farm..turns out he had a drug problem.. he'd lie about every thing, take off and show up 2 days later all geeked out stay up till 3 in the morning there was many of mornings hed wake me up going up and down the stairs id end up getting up about 4 and staying up till 12 or so that night.. had my fill so one of the no show jones weekends i set him out! packed his belonging and put a sticky note "im done! enough said!" i felt bad but thing were getting out of hand fast.. he had talked to doug one time about me getting after him for being up all night doug told him this was her house, she was the boss ,and the best thing to do was NOT to p*** her off! he went to janes.. she got him a place to stay w her step dad.. he was running around w known iv user ho's was so afraid he'd bring something scary home... it flips me out that we opened our home to him.. feed and sheltered him and the had no respect for us.. turns out my sister gave him the ol boot too no one was honest with me about what had happen till he got here... no he resides w my worst enemy .. his father who he hated for ever till a few weeks ago... lession learned.. i got biten dobermans and my door is shut! ol guy at work told me "dont let a bit'en dog bite u twice!" how true is that! my theory on all of this i have more family than i can stand!

 

[Alice]

There's no way you can deal with a drug addict, Rose...especially an adult drug addict. It'll be hard, but you'll just have to condition yourself to the fact that one day you will get word that he's died, or wound up in jail (which would be the best place for him).

My aunt and uncle had to come to that conclusion with one of their sons. They made certain that his child did not do without, and left her a big inheritance, but their son was on his own. He outlived them...but not by very much. Drug addiction is a sad state of affairs.

I know your brother's lifestyle is hurting your heart...you have my sympathy.

Alice :heart:

 

[Beefy]

its not just your family brownmule, its people in general that suck. no offense anyone.

 

[brownmule]

alice and beefy your both right on all accounts. i told my sister in law ( who works for 911) if she gets a call about him laying in a ditch... we dont know him!! 38 yr old man acting like a out of control teenager no disrespect to the teenagers here...im sure they show more respect and responsibility when there are a sleep than he could on a good day.. i hate it that they suckered me .. but i have told him he cant play me.. i say what i mean and i mean what i say.. this bridge he has burnt turns out he has burnt alot of them .. ppl that are decent are a rare breed.. and hard to find.. but it make me apprecated them so much more and i never take any one for granted...
i think ill stick to taking in stay dogs and donkeys.. in stead of ppl lol ... rose

 

[Lammie]

Everyone has someone like that in their family. No one is perfect, and even though you love him because he's family, that doesn't mean that you have to put up with his crud. Sometimes it takes some tough love to make a person see him or herself as having a problem. I had a brother that was an alcoholic and he never did anything but blame other people for it, especially after someone told him that the tendency to abuse alcohol might be inherited. He's passed now.

Anyway, stick to your guns. And good luck.

 

[Jogeephus]

Two of my favorite sayings apply to this:

First, "the reason God gave you friends is to make up for family"

Second, "many people are like blisters, they always show up when the work is done."

You are right, there is nothing you can do to help someone like this - the only person that can help themselves is themself. Unfortunately, we tend to be too tenderhearted and try and "fix" someone. It ain't gonna work. The sooner we (and our government) figure this out the better we all will be.

The Bible says, "for even when I was with you, those who did not work did not eat".

 

[mdmdogs3]

this brings to mind one of my favorites
sh_t on me once - shame on you
sh_t on me twice - shame on me

stick to your guns and remember it could have been worse

 

[J. T.]

Beefy, there's alot of good, decent people on this globe. God gave us the ability to choose how we live, but He did make us in His image. We are the zenith of His creation. And He did make the supreme sacrifice for us.

 

[Mosho]

I agree with JT. I know there are some rotten apples out there but I know many very kind, gracious, loving people. My family is not perfect but it will do until a perfect one comes along.
Brownmule, I am so sorry that you feel that your family is the pits. I know you must feel sad about your brother.

 

[GMN]

He doesn't have any respect for himself, so he won't have any for anyone else. Until he gets help for his drug addiction, there really isn't anything you can do. In saying this I would not give up on him 100% either, find a place where you can still be in contact, just from a distance, Some day he will grow up, make a change, and if and when that day comes he will need all the family (emotional) support he can get.

GMN

 

[Saltydawg]

If I tell everyone I know I'm gonna take the boat out on the lake for some cruising and fishing on Saturday I'll have so many people lined up I have to turn them away.

If I tell everyone I really need a hand getting some hay in on Saturday I'll be sitting there picking my nose saturday morning wondering where they're all at.

I've learned to hire strangers to help with the hay and not tell family or friends when I'm taking the boat out :lol: