AI and Marriage

[TexasBred]

Another note in my book of why I have a tough time understanding you boys from the south! :shock:

Just joking .... To most of you. :shock: :hide:

If it were a lady I'd call it "foreplay". I have no idea what you call it in this situation. Strange to say the least. I have never been that dam curious. Put the semen where it goes at the right time and don't worry about whether she enjoyed it or not. !!!!!!! :bang: :bang:

 

[Bigfoot]

I feel better now for some reason.

 

[herofan]

 

[tripleBfarms]

Possibly the funniest thread in the history of Cattle Today............Thanks Inyati you goofy sonofagun! :tiphat: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

:nod: Good Laugh

 

[CKC1586]

I better come clean. This has gone far enough. Here are the facts:

I am having trouble when I AI one heifer. She gets nervous and I cannot manipulate her cervix. dun and alisonb did suggest clitorial stimulation prior to insertion of the AI syringe. This helps relax the heifer. There is research in that direction but what I read was that it helps older cows but not so much heifers. I was honest in not knowing where the clitorus was. Today, I examined the vulva of a heifer and think I identified what is the clitorus. I do plan to try the stimulation. It cannot possibly hurt. If she is even distracted, I am ahead of the game.

When I was doing this today, this whole joke began to take form in my mind. I have had a good laugh tonight and I needed that. I hope someone else laughed with me. Goodnight all. I know you folks may think my cheese has slipped off the cracker. Don't think on it anymore. It has been gone for years and is probably molded by now.

:shock: :? Well now, sure had me going back and re reading (as in what did he say kinda way) and never seeing our AI guys do this kinda stuff, wondering what the heck!? Anyway made a lot of us folks think about some weird stuff.... Everyone have a great day. :tiphat:

 

[alisonb]

I am having trouble when I AI one heifer. She gets nervous and I cannot manipulate her cervix. dun and alisonb did suggest clitorial stimulation prior to insertion of the AI syringe. This helps relax the heifer.

On a more serious note then - Most young heifers need to be relaxed as they are obviously green to the whole AI thing, how to accomplish that is up to each individual. Some brush them, some massage the rectal tract or clitoris, some don't do a thing but the general idea is to get the animal calm and relaxed. Once the AI is completed and the pistolette removed, the clitoris is massaged for 10-15 seconds as this has proved to increase uterine contractions which in turn improves conception rate. I don't see anything funny about it nor do I see any harm in it, one is already 'artificially' inseminating the animal so to keep it as close to nature as possible makes all the sense in the world to me. Straws and time are expensive so to up conception rate is a priority.

 

[inyati13]

I am having trouble when I AI one heifer. She gets nervous and I cannot manipulate her cervix. dun and alisonb did suggest clitorial stimulation prior to insertion of the AI syringe. This helps relax the heifer.

On a more serious note then - Most young heifers need to be relaxed as they are obviously green to the whole AI thing, how to accomplish that is up to each individual. Some brush them, some massage the rectal tract or clitoris, some don't do a thing but the general idea is to get the animal calm and relaxed. Once the AI is completed and the pistolette removed, the clitoris is massaged for 10-15 seconds as this has proved to increase uterine contractions which in turn improves conception rate. I don't see anything funny about it nor do I see any harm in it, one is already 'artificially' inseminating the animal so to keep it as close to nature as possible makes all the sense in the world to me. Straws and time are expensive so to up conception rate is a priority.

alisonb, I agree with that 100%. In fact, I was thinking the same thing. I was not making fun of the clitorus technique. I just used it to have some fun here. I appreciate any help you can give me.

 

[greybeard]

I better come clean. This has gone far enough. Here are the facts:

I am having trouble when I AI one heifer. She gets nervous and I cannot manipulate her cervix. dun and alisonb did suggest clitorial stimulation prior to insertion of the AI syringe. This helps relax the heifer. There is research in that direction but what I read was that it helps older cows but not so much heifers. I was honest in not knowing where the clitorus was. Today, I examined the vulva of a heifer and think I identified what is the clitorus. I do plan to try the stimulation. It cannot possibly hurt. If she is even distracted, I am ahead of the game.

When I was doing this today, this whole joke began to take form in my mind. I have had a good laugh tonight and I needed that. I hope someone else laughed with me. Goodnight all. I know you folks may think my cheese has slipped off the cracker. Don't think on it anymore. It has been gone for years and is probably molded by now.

"joke"
Yeah--ok--sure.
Riiiight.
It's yore story--tell it like ya want...

 

[ALACOWMAN]

Done at the time of AI, it helps. Any other time is only foreplay

I understand that. Hook you and I are good friends, surely you know me well enough now that I had to make sure it worked. I wanted to test the results myself before she comes into heat and I am actually doing the AI. I wanted to see if she relaxed. Truth is, she didn't even like it.

no wonder he was so quick to take up for you with my post...just kidding by the way

 

[Alan]

My momma told me to watch out for them pree verts on the inta nit.

 

[melking]

You are the master Inyati! I laughed so hard I choked.

 

[skeeter swatter]

I guess that answers the DO YOUR COWS LIKE YOU question. :banana:

 

[M5farm]

I guess that answers the DO YOUR COWS LIKE YOU question. :banana:

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

 

[TexasBred]

I don't see anything funny about it nor do I see any harm in it, one is already 'artificially' inseminating the animal so to keep it as close to nature as possible makes all the sense in the world to me. Straws and time are expensive so to up conception rate is a priority.

Close to nature? I've never seen a bull stimulate a clitoris nor really care how relaxed a heifer was. Putting it where it goes at the right time will increase conception rate.

 

[inyati13]

I don't see anything funny about it nor do I see any harm in it, one is already 'artificially' inseminating the animal so to keep it as close to nature as possible makes all the sense in the world to me. Straws and time are expensive so to up conception rate is a priority.

Close to nature? I've never seen a bull stimulate a clitoris nor really care how relaxed a heifer was. Putting it where it goes at the right time will increase conception rate.

True, true. But research indicates when using AI you increase your chances if you stimulate the clitorus following deposition of the semen. I got a PM with reference to the publications and sure enough the research is there. dun has indicated that he does it.

But in regard to what occurs in nature, I agree. But if you look where the clitorus is located (just inside the vulva and posterior to the urinary orifice), the penis of the bull no doubt makes contact and does some stimulation. But considering how fast a bull is at doing his job, I can't see much of an arousal.

 

[alisonb]

I don't see anything funny about it nor do I see any harm in it, one is already 'artificially' inseminating the animal so to keep it as close to nature as possible makes all the sense in the world to me. Straws and time are expensive so to up conception rate is a priority.

Close to nature? I've never seen a bull stimulate a clitoris nor really care how relaxed a heifer was. Putting it where it goes at the right time will increase conception rate.

Get with it TB, next you will deny all existence of a clitoris, if you don't already . Some little concealed ornament designed by our creator just for the he!! of it.

The whole point of the discussion was to aid inyati13 who was having difficulty AI'ing a heifer, telling him to 'put it where it goes at the right time' may just have been the advice he was looking for ;-)

 

[ALACOWMAN]

I don't see anything funny about it nor do I see any harm in it, one is already 'artificially' inseminating the animal so to keep it as close to nature as possible makes all the sense in the world to me. Straws and time are expensive so to up conception rate is a priority.

Close to nature? I've never seen a bull stimulate a clitoris nor really care how relaxed a heifer was. Putting it where it goes at the right time will increase conception rate.

they use to stone folks to death, that got that close to nature :lol2:

 

[IABeef]

WOW, this was an interesting thread!