There five things I have done once in my life, and 1 time was enough. I am a fast leaner. I have had one marriage, one divorce, one root canal, jumped out of one airplane ( well thrown out kicking and screaming is more accurate) and rode 1 bull. Those are 5 things I will never do again.
I was at a rodeo in 1980 in Athens, roping in the slack. Bunch of us hanging around waiting, like we do at rodeos, and shooting the ****. One of my friends that knew me, told the group "Old Warren there( I was 22-23) has never been bucked off a horse, and never will be". And that I still true today, knock on wood. I did get bucked off a mule in 2006 and broke my arm and my back in 2 places, though. Well one thing led to another, and one guy said " I bet he can't go 2 seconds on a bull though." Finally , they talked me into it. They paid for me to enter as an exhibition, loaned me the rig, etc. So before long, I found myself being helped down on one, and they were all helping me get set right, rope right and all. I remember thinking "I might not ought to do this. Even if I win...ride it 8 seconds, there is only one way off. They don't do pick-up men in bulls." I was still thinking I ought to tell them never mind, get me undone and off of here, when the old gate guy said " Get ya a deep seat and a far-away look...I am fixin to turn this mother out!!! SOB!!! 1st jump out the gate I was trying to hold on with my spurs and both hands. Hell with a qualified run, I was just trying to buy time til I could think of how to get off and not be killed.
I remember as a kid, being towed on an innertube behind a boat, and the driver started running wide ass open in a big circle. I was picking up speed every few feet. I wanted to turn lose and get off, but was scared, and the faster we got the more scared to turn lose I was, until finally the tube and me went airborn, then skipping across the lake like a thrown stone. I should have gotten off sooner. Well, that was how I felt on that bull, trying to figure out what to do and it was getting worse every second. In retrospect I wish I had grabbed the gate and just let him run out from other me. The cowboys were hootin and hollering and laughing at me. I don't know how long I rode him, but it was a LONG time. I heard the buzzer seems like hours before I finally got off. They were hollering "Damn, son, you about got him kid-broke to ride". and "Warren, you got him side passing now". and " Get off the bull, Warren, you are wearing him out"! Well finally he throwed my ass off with a jump and when his front feet hit he did a 360. I went flying, eating dirt, and sure enough what I feared... he nailed me. 4 broke ribs, but hey: I had 20 friends rolling around laughing til their sides hurt damn near as bad as mine with the broke ribs!
There is no tougher athlete in the world in any sport than a bullrider. And the best and toughest of them are the bullfighters. The one that got that bull of me got gored and busted up a little, getting between that bul and me til the other one drug me out form under it.
If they would give convicts root canals in stead of prison, we'd see almost zero repeat offenders.
I fought a Navy Seal for 8 minutes and nearly tore a strut off the wing before he got me out of the plane, but how that came to pass that is a story for another day.
