Classes for Men

[TexasBred]

THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Friday, March, 28, 2008 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5 Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6 Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8 Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11 Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.


Class 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14 The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

 

[Lammie]

Number 3 is a waste of time, as I believe that peeing everywhere is in the male DNA.

Number 11 is good and it can save a man's life. I need to sign the Hub up for that one.

 

[john250]

All that stuff is going to take a LOT of time, which could otherwise be spent drinking beer and working on machines. Like 4 wheelers and fast cars.
And, when we graduate, there will still be something about you that ticks her off. Something that happened 5 years ago, but she hasn't forgotten.
And that "calling home when you are late" thing is exactly why you DON"T want a cell phone with GPS.

 

[Lammie]

All that stuff is going to take a LOT of time, which could otherwise be spent drinking beer and working on machines. Like 4 wheelers and fast cars.
And, when we graduate, there will still be something about you that ticks her off. Something that happened 5 years ago, but she hasn't forgotten.
And that "calling home when you are late" thing is exactly why you DON"T want a cell phone with GPS.

Voice of experience?

 

[john250]

All that stuff is going to take a LOT of time, which could otherwise be spent drinking beer and working on machines. Like 4 wheelers and fast cars.
And, when we graduate, there will still be something about you that ticks her off. Something that happened 5 years ago, but she hasn't forgotten.
And that "calling home when you are late" thing is exactly why you DON"T want a cell phone with GPS.

Voice of experience?

Yes, except for the cell phone part.

 

[pdfangus]

Rather than a point by point rebuttal of the the above list of male bashing nagging points which I first started to do.......I determined that it didn't make any difference because if by some miracle all of maledom was able to accomplish any one of those points to the satisfaction of the female species......Then ten more points of incessant irritation to the long suffering and superior females would appear if by magic.

conclusion is the best course of action is to hit delete and continue to enjoy life as a man.

 

[flaboy]

Class 15 -Dealing with Emotions - This class will delve into the depths of the most inner workings of the female and teach you how to pretend to listen, how to pretend you care what she thinks, and do this while you are watching TV. :help:

 

[Bullbuyer]

I'm sorry, were you all talking about something? I am trying to watch the basketball games...

 

[Dave]

I was recently in the lunch room at work with a co-worker. A young female co-worker walked through and he said something to her. She obviously didn't hear him and kept walking. He said that all young ladies were ignoring him anymore. I told him I have started ignoring all females. He asked how well that was working out for me. After some thought I replied, "just as well as bending over backwards for then ever did. Except it is a lot more peaceful".

 

[Lammie]

I was recently in the lunch room at work with a co-worker. A young female co-worker walked through and he said something to her. She obviously didn't hear him and kept walking. He said that all young ladies were ignoring him anymore. I told him I have started ignoring all females. He asked how well that was working out for me. After some thought I replied, "just as well as bending over backwards for then ever did. Except it is a lot more peaceful".

I have found through my life experience, that ignoring a man will make him chase you all the more. So will the silent treatment. If I am really mad at Steve, I don't talk to him and it makes him nuts. Sooner or later he wil apoplgize.

Now, I don't want any of you mens to start acting like the silent treatment is a good thing. :roll:

 

[chrisy]

Class 15 -Dealing with Emotions - This class will delve into the depths of the most inner workings of the female and teach you how to pretend to listen, how to pretend you care what she thinks, and do this while you are watching TV. :help:

:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: don't make me laugh but.....sorry this encounters doing three things at once, and everyone knows men couldn't cope with such a thing, one thing on the brain is enough, brain implode within first few seconds of class. :banana: :roll:

 

[pdfangus]

I was recently in the lunch room at work with a co-worker. A young female co-worker walked through and he said something to her. She obviously didn't hear him and kept walking. He said that all young ladies were ignoring him anymore. I told him I have started ignoring all females. He asked how well that was working out for me. After some thought I replied, "just as well as bending over backwards for then ever did. Except it is a lot more peaceful".

I have found through my life experience, that ignoring a man will make him chase you all the more. So will the silent treatment. If I am really mad at Steve, I don't talk to him and it makes him nuts. Sooner or later he wil apoplgize.

Now, I don't want any of you mens to start acting like the silent treatment is a good thing. :roll:

apparently you have sucessfully beaten him into submission.

I personally love the silent treatment as I don't have to listen to a lot of useless racket that is not going to change my thought processes one iota anyhow.

 

[hrbelgians]

This sounds very educational, however I think I will be out of town. I feel terrible.

 

[john250]

I have found through my life experience, that ignoring a man will make him chase you all the more. So will the silent treatment. If I am really mad at Steve, I don't talk to him and it makes him nuts. Sooner or later he wil apoplgize.

And he won't have the faintest idea why he is apologizing. Other than he is digging out of a hole.

 

[Lammie]

And that works for me...

 

[3waycross]

I have found through my life experience, that ignoring a man will make him chase you all the more. So will the silent treatment. If I am really mad at Steve, I don't talk to him and it makes him nuts. Sooner or later he wil apoplgize.

Works real good right up to that day when he asks one time what's wrong and when he gets no answer, he quits worrying about it. Been there doing that. Amazingly liberating

 

[Calman]

Why should we have to raise the toilet seat up? Why don't the ladies raise it up after they use it. After all aint that the way they found it.

Cal

 

[MistyMorning]

Class 15 -Dealing with Emotions - This class will delve into the depths of the most inner workings of the female and teach you how to pretend to listen, how to pretend you care what she thinks, and do this while you are watching TV. :help:

:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: don't make me laugh but.....sorry this encounters doing three things at once, and everyone knows men couldn't cope with such a thing, one thing on the brain is enough, brain implode within first few seconds of class. :banana: :roll:

If that isn't the truth there Chris.....but it is pretty amazing that bagboy put three examples of dealing with emotions together.....heck I thought he had just learned how to walk and chew gum at the same time! :shock:

 

[Lammie]

Why should we have to raise the toilet seat up? Why don't the ladies raise it up after they use it. After all aint that the way they found it.

Cal

You pee indoors? I didn't think guys did that. Not around here they don't.

 

[Calman]

Why should we have to raise the toilet seat up? Why don't the ladies raise it up after they use it. After all aint that the way they found it.

Cal

You pee indoors? I didn't think guys did that. Not around here they don't.

Lammie
When you get my age you don't much care where you pee ya just wan't to hurry up and get-er-done.
Sides it's been to cold to go out side in the mornings.

Cal