Redneck "gentleman's" pick up lines

[Alice]

1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea ...
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.

7) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

8 ) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

9) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

10) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

11) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til
afternoon.

 

[cowspider]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[warpaint]

Gotta luv no.6. :lol:

 

[Alice]

I think 6 and 9 are my favorites. They cracked me up... :lol2:

Alice

 

[mnmtranching]

Sure bet some of those lines would work up nort. 8)

 

[chrisy]

Good laugh there Alice, thanks, :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[smart_slider]

:lol: :lol: those are pretty good :lol: :lol:
ss

 

[Crowderfarms]

Aunt Alice, I received another version of that e-mail a few days ago, and was afraid to post it. You left out the one that says "You remind me of a wrench, cuz everytime I see you my Nu+'s tighten up."

 

[Alice]

Aunt Alice, I received another version of that e-mail a few days ago, and was afraid to post it. You left out the one that says "You remind me of a wrench, cuz everytime I see you my Nu+'s tighten up."

Yes I did...plus the one about them both being squirrels and hiding nuts...

Alice

 

[Jogeephus]

Thanks, now I gotta clean my keyboard and get some of that blue eyed cleaner for the screen as well. :lol:

 

[Beefy]

Alice, are those space pants youre wearing? cuz your ass is out of this world!

 

[Alice]

Alice, are those space pants youre wearing? cuz your ass is out of this world!

I do circle Jupiter periodically...

Alice

 

[Alice]

Thanks, now I gotta clean my keyboard and get some of that blue eyed cleaner for the screen as well. :lol:

This is funnier than anything else! I'm almost to that "snort laugh"...

Alice

 

[showkid1200]

:shock: :lol: thats funny