I hit the jackpot!!!!!

[Jogeephus]

Yesterday I was working in the barn and had my hands full when I got a call from a Pakistani Tele-Marketer and he informed me I had just won $5 million!!!!! I listened to him and answered a few meaningless questions then he told me his manager needed to talk to me and arrange the details of how they would deliver my money. The manager - another Pakistani talking fella - whose name was Andy so with a name like Andy I knew he just sounded Pakistani and was really just a good old American boy. Anyhow he starts explaining to me what all will be needed to deliver the money to me today but I ask him to hold because I think someone is breaking in my home. He asks me to repeat what I said and I then just asked him to give me a minute. At which time I was standing outside and yell, "freeze, don't move" then I shoot my pistol once. I then yell, "I told you not to move" and shoot three more times. Remembering Andy and my $5 million I get back on the phone to talk to Andy and work the details out but the phone was dead. I guess we lost our connection. He'll probably call me today and get my money to me.

 

[john250]

You've got internet there at the asylum? Sweet.

 

[HDRider]

Jo,
Don't let this opportunity slip away. Go find Andy. How many people in Pakistan can be named Andy? Can't be many.

BTW - Glad you killed that scumbag burglar. Who knows what havoc he might have caused?

 

[cowboy43]

I had the same thing happen to me , but I told him to hold on a second, the police officer wants to talk to him, because he is a witness as to what happened.

 

[Jogeephus]

Its been a long time before I've had a call like this. Andy was supposed to get the money to me yesterday. He sounded like a fine fella and I hope nothing bad happened to him.

 

[dun]

I get emails like that but never phone calls. But that could be because we don;t answer the house phone and if I don;t recognize the number I don;t answer on the cell phone.

 

[Jogeephus]

The phone number was unlisted and I normally wouldn't have answered it but I've been corresponding with the ATF over a license renewal issue and I thought it was them because I had just faxed them the additional information they wanted but didn't fill in the blanks like they wanted. Instead, I made a comment which was a tad on the sarcastic side because the redundancy of the redundant question just begged for it. Ie, If you require me to give you a phone number where I can be reached 24/7 why then do you ask for me to fill out times when you can call me on each day of the week? :bang:

 

[dun]

I had to fill out a form yesterday that POed me pretty well. On just half a page I had to enter my full name, SSN and DOB 9 times.

 

[jedstivers]

I had to fill out a form yesterday that POed me pretty well. On just half a page I had to enter my full name, SSN and DOB 9 times.

Good thing you have one of the early SS numbers with only three digits.

 

[melking]

I had to fill out a form yesterday that POed me pretty well. On just half a page I had to enter my full name, SSN and DOB 9 times.

Good thing you have one of the early SS numbers with only three digits.

Oh Snap!

 

[Jogeephus]

And to think any time they turn you down or stall your application they tally it as a point for stopping an act of terrorism or some nonsense.

 

[dun]

I had to fill out a form yesterday that POed me pretty well. On just half a page I had to enter my full name, SSN and DOB 9 times.

Good thing you have one of the early SS numbers with only three digits.

When did they add the other 2 digits?

 

[Jogeephus]

:lol2: :lol2:

 

[Hook]

Man, just imagine how rich you'll be when you open your junk email folders. I can double your wealth by forwarding what I have in mine. Only 19.95.




But wait there's more.
Act quickly and I'll forward the ones from junk email folder for the business as well

 

[Drzr]

Maybe the burglar overheard your phone call and was breaking in to hold you hostage until you collected...lol

 

[Red Bull Breeder]

Dang Joe I found two sheets of copper the other day and thought I had done good.

 

[Caustic Burno]

I always ask if they will take the Lone Star card.
That gets rid of 99% off the bat.
I have also used I will write you two checks if the first isn't good send the other one through in two or three
days. Like to do that with salesmen and such the look is always priceless.

 

[greybeard]

Man, just imagine how rich you'll be when you open your junk email folders. I can double your wealth by forwarding what I have in mine. Only 19.95.




But wait there's more.
Act quickly and I'll forward the ones from junk email folder for the business as well

You ever thought to sweeten that deal with an offer of getting a set of Ginzu steak knives with that?
That's a deal breaker for lots of folks.

 

[hurleyjd]

My Son manages the local credit union. He tells everyone in the office that if any elder person comes in and ask for a large sum that is large for them and unusual.a week ago an elder member came in an wanted a cashier check for $5000 it was to pay the taxes on a new Mercedes he won. Was directed to the Sons office. My Son questioned him in a way to not upset him. Asked the member if he had the phone number to call back. Of course My Son called and he talked to the person with the scam. The scammer told him he was at a motel and had the car to deliver. Son told the scammer that you are only thirty minutes away and to bring the car to the CU and pick up your check. Told the member that the CU would take care of all of the paper work and transfers. Of course no car every showed up. Son has saved a lot of his members from the scams and pigeon drop artist. Also from a lot of car dealers that sold warranties that ran concurrent with the mfg warranties.

 

[greybeard]

Also from a lot of car dealers that sold warranties that ran concurrent with the mfg warranties.

That is a current big thing right there--and not just for automobiles. I keep getting them for my new kitchen range as well as for our 2013 Dodge--both either still under manufacturers original warranty or manufacturer's extended warranty, but people keep calling or sending out the bogus letters telling us they are about to expire. :roll: