Fixin to get interesting.

[highgrit]

I will help my kids as much as I can afford to. But they will be helping themselves as much as possible. I will never have a kid sit at home and not work. They've been taught a work ethic and as long as they work hard. And keep their nose clean I have their back. You guy's are way tougher than me I guess. My kids are my life, everything I have is there's. I'm just looking after it while I can.

 

[cow pollinater]

Rafter S, well said.
Kids are always a blessing. In three years you won't remember the circumstances of how you were blessed, you'll just be glad that you were. It's not the first time that an unintended child was born and it won't be the last but take your blessing and don't look back.

 

[Luca Brasi]

Don't get me wrong, I'm very much in favor of tough love and expecting everyone to stand on their own and accept the consequences of their own decisions, but there is a huge difference between chronically enabling a loser and helping a child when a situation arises which may be beyond his control, or even which occurs because of an ocasional poor choice or lack of foresight. Even if caused by reckless or foolish choices, I certainy would never phrase a denial of assistance to a child of mine in terms like he could starve to death for all I cared. Maybe it was just luck, or maybe he did an exeptional job, because I never needed to go back and ask my father for serious help with any major financial issue, a place to live, etc, but I never doubted for a second that if anything serious ever happened that he would be there for me. It shall be the same for my children.

Illegitimate fatherless children are a scourge of our society and our economy. Sure, any child should be loved and welcomed, but discussing it as though there is no shame or probable negative affect on the life and potential of the child, the mother and the taxpayers is celebrating it. It is far too acceptable today.

 

[Commercialfarmer]

Sounds like she's grown up enough to make the first parent decision right. To me, that's definitely something to be celebrated. Hope the boy makes the right decision as well.

Luca, I bet there ain't a single one of us that doesn't come from a non union or 10- you included. It's a tough row to hoe, but they'll be the ones having to do it. No reason to crucify them if they are willing to take responsibility for their decisions. That is so far above the ones not willing to do so. No one is saying it will be easy or suggesting it as an ideal. It is what it is. You don't believe in second chances? I wish them nothing but the best.

On the other subject, moms and dad's meddling to much in their adult kids lives have ruined a lot marriages. Last I knew, they left their mother and father and became one.

 

[Luca Brasi]

I don't intend to crucify anyone personally, but the issue in general is a big problem today that fewer and fewer people give a second thought. A lot of PC fools even have the nerve to be offended if you have the fortitude to stand up and say that it is not right. I've had my fill of these single mothers who now use their situation as a crutch and even expect others to accomodate and give them handouts because of their own poor choices and lack of control.

 

[Hook]

If you don't think an unintended teenage pregnancy can happen in even the best, most highly regarded of families you're fooling yourself. Shyt happens. It's how you react that makes the difference and sets a person apart from failure or success.
Celebrate it? Sure. Why not? A joyful, innocent, beautiful thing is coming into our lives. He77 yeah we're going to celebrate it.
Support them? Absolutely. Just as we would in perfect conditions. Do everything for them? Nope.

 

[ANAZAZI]

Good reply right there!

 

[M-5]

Good reply right there!

Yes hook, very good reply.

Now Luci that horse your riding requires an extension ladder. Humans are not perfect everyone makes poor choices because we are a fallin creation. I don't cast stones because I am guilty Of the exact same as this topic. Now birth control claims about 99.9 percent I have experienced that .01. It made me grow up, I took responsibility and married the girl. I didn't have any money, I had to ask for help not for me but to make sure my child ate. We were also surprised twice more while on birth control after we were married. Everything happens for a reason. Will these kids make it work? who knows its not up to anyone but them. I see too many single mothers out there also and I'm sure they all would like them man that helped them get into that situation be a man and accept his responsibility. A lot of that can be attributed to not enough tough love by his parents growing up. I would have rather fought a bear than to ask my father for some help. He gladly helped but I did not rest until the money was put back in his hand. I have young adult children now and have helped Them all try to get on their feet its tough because I've been thru it. Oh and btw that pretty young girl I knocked up 25 years ago is gonna get something silver next month.

 

[highgrit]

I sure hope your not going to knock her up again. M-5, folks like you aren't the one's that freeload off the system. Hook you said it about as well as a father could.

 

[TN Cattle Man]

If you don't think an unintended teenage pregnancy can happen in even the best, most highly regarded of families you're fooling yourself. Shyt happens. It's how you react that makes the difference and sets a person apart from failure or success.
Celebrate it? Sure. Why not? A joyful, innocent, beautiful thing is coming into our lives. He77 yeah we're going to celebrate it.
Support them? Absolutely. Just as we would in perfect conditions. Do everything for them? Nope.

Well said!

 

[Luca Brasi]

I'm not talking about the increasingly rare couples who do the right thing and create proper families out of illegitimate pregnancies. The overwhelming majority create a hopeless future for the children, a drain on the welfare systems and fodder for almost all of the future prison population. Justifying it and even glamorizing it only serves to encourage it. It sometimes happens in even good families, but it's how it is handled that makes a lot of difference. I am lucky that it's never happened in my family, but if it did you can bet that it would not be cause for celebration for potentially ruining 3 or even more lives. There would be no baby shower or other celebration and it certainly wouldn't be bragged about. Good for the boy's family for being upset. They have a lot of cause to be.
I also don't understand why it is so common now that these unwed mothers mostly feel that they have to keep it. Or maybe it's just that those who make other difficult and selfless decisions do not get the same attention as those who are allowed to celebrate the blessed event.

 

[msplmtneer]

Hook do what you feel is right and do it the best you can!

Luca
Matthew 7: 1-2 you ever read this?
Also never judge a person until you have walked a mile in their moccasins!
:tiphat:

 

[M-5]

I'm not talking about the increasingly rare couples who do the right thing and create proper families out of illegitimate pregnancies. The overwhelming majority create a hopeless future for the children, a drain on the welfare systems and fodder for almost all of the future prison population. Justifying it and even glamorizing it only serves to encourage it. It sometimes happens in even good families, but it's how it is handled that makes a lot of difference. I am lucky that it's never happened in my family, but if it did you can bet that it would not be cause for celebration for potentially ruining 3 or even more lives. There would be no baby shower or other celebration and it certainly wouldn't be bragged about. Good for the boy's family for being upset. They have a lot of cause to be.
I also don't understand why it is so common now that these unwed mothers mostly feel that they have to keep it. Or maybe it's just that those who make other difficult and selfless decisions do not get the same attention as those who are allowed to celebrate the blessed event.

There Is so much wrong with your post here. All I will say is you better grease the locks on your children or grandchildren's chastity belts because making statements like that will all most assuredly make you eat them words. I also feel sorry for your offspring

 

[denvermartinfarms]

we all know this is wrong and not the way its suposed to be, but the ship has sailed. I never saw where hook seemed exited about the circumstances or was bragging about it.

Ain't like there's anything anyone can do about it now except try to make the best out of what's there, what's wrong with that?

 

[Craig Miller]

First off congrats on the grandkid hook.

Luci i think its great that so many are keeping the kids. Every life is precious not just the planned ones. Also on the marriages, why should a person make the situation worse by marrying someone they cant stand to be around which will lead to a divorce and cause even more heart ache for the kid and families.

 

[hillsdown]

Hook, I wish your daughter continued good health during her pregnancy and hope both mom and baby are doing well.

Best wishes to everyone involved, you all must be feeling very overwhelmed right now.

 

[highgrit]

Our family is a little different than most I guess. For one we wouldn't put it all out there like Hook has. But it a good discussion and my daughter has read the whole thread. I've been raised Christian conservative, and raised my family the same way. But in my family there's always going to be the option of choice. We're not going to take any options off the table. Different folks have different ideals, and I'm sure ours are different than most folks on this board. But you have to live with your choices, right, wrong or other wise.
Hook and his family are doing what's best for them, right, wrong or otherwise. And I wish him and his family the best of luck.

 

[TexasBred]

Our family is a little different than most I guess. For one we wouldn't put it all out there like Hook has. But it a good discussion and my daughter has read the whole thread. I've been raised Christian conservative, and raised my family the same way. But in my family there's always going to be the option of choice. We're not going to take any options off the table. Different folks have different ideals, and I'm sure ours are different than most folks on this board. But you have to live with your choices, right, wrong or other wise.
Hook and his family are doing what's best for them, right, wrong or otherwise. And I wish him and his family the best of luck.

Are you saying abortion would be an option and you would go along with it??

 

[Hook]

Luca I'm glad your world is so perfect that everything in it goes exactly as planned. You better throw a few extra dollars in gods tip jar. Because with your expectations of you family you're gonna need all the divine help you can get.

 

[Hook]

Also, highrit, we've always been a very vocal family. Always said what was on our minds good or bad. Lack of filters I guess. As you said, this has turned into an interesting discussion. Hopefully for a positive purpose.