Dang cell phones

[Jogeephus]

Just got a call informing me I just won $500,000,000 in the mega jackpot drawing AND a brand new Mercedes Benz. :banana: :banana: :banana: With joyous laugther, I told the funny talking gentleman on the phone that I was going to immediately quit my job and go home and wait for the delivery of my prizes when the call was bumped - or maybe he hung up on me. I hope he didn't think I was laughing at him. I'll still get my prize money won't I ? I'm going home. Anyone up to easing around the country next month in a Mercedes? My treat and I'll even let you drive.

Oh, BTW, to whoever bought the lottery ticket for me, THANKS!!!! I'll give you half of it once I finish buying cell phones.

 

[skyhightree1]

That is hilarious.

 

[I luv herfrds]

Good for you Jo! Let us know when you get the car you can come cruise up here!

Just got a call on my cell phone about a job oppurtunity told the guy to buzz off! since I was sick, he hung up, I called the number and got removed from their list.

 

[Limomike]

:lol2: :clap: :lol2:

 

[dun]

One email account gets a couple of those messages a month. I'm still waiting for the money from the first one 10 years ago.

 

[chippie]

You must naturally be a lucky person. I never win anything ;-)

 

[Jogeephus]

I'm also generous and have decided to divide this windfall equally to everyone on the board. Once I settle with the taxman of course.

 

[chippie]

Thank you! I appreciate your generosity.

 

[kenny thomas]

But Jo, think of all the cell phones you can buy now for the needy. They might need to call and see when their check is coming. :lol2:

 

[Jogeephus]

Kenny, that was my utmost concern and is why I will not divide the money till I give Dotgov their meager portion. No problem Chippie, if I kept all of it for myself I'd only wind up getting in trouble.

I was surprised - no shocked - when I got home and there wasn't a new Mercedes in the drive. I just hope the fine fella didn't think I was laughing at his accent cause I was just laughing at the thought of how sorry I was planning on being.

Maybe tomorrow.

 

[Workinonit Farm]

I'm also generous and have decided to divide this windfall equally to everyone on the board. Once I settle with the taxman of course.

Doggone it!! I was all excited about how generous you were going to be with all of us here at CT until I got to the part about the taxman Never mind Thanks anyway After the taxman is through with you you'll be lucky if you have enough left to put fuel in the tank of that new car.

If you do get enough to fill the tank in the car, head on up this way, to Va. Lots of us CT folks here in this lovely state.

Katherine

 

[Jogeephus]

Ah shoot, the taxman is only gonna take about half which should leave me about $250,000,000. :banana: I do plan on driving to Virginia cause its a pretty state and I have to hand deliver the money cause Macon said if I did this I would have to give everyone cash else it would violate some rule in subsection 19934 subparagraph Z of the forum rules.

I hope ya'll realize though if I give you your share this will make you a one percenter so you might want to think about that and the scorn which will accompany this. Of course, if I give you cash and you deny ever receiving it then you would have plausible deniability and maintain your status as a 99 percenter. Ah, now I understand subsection 19934 subparagraph Z. Macon's a smart feller. :nod:

 

[Ryder]

Jogeephus after you settle up with the taxman you are going to feel really good.
Contributing your fair share has got to be a morale builder. :banana:

I don't think Algore has learned that yet.

 

[Jogeephus]

Speaking of Al Gore, did you see where he sold his failing television station to the Arabs for $300 million and was all upset that he couldn't get it closed before capital gains went up? I wonder what this was all about and what he was getting paid for? Way I see it, this is about like getting $50,000 for a six year old heifer that's been unable to bear a live calf. Time Warner called it quits with whatever arrangement they had with him while he was in office so I guess the Arabs are paying him for some favor that's past due. Amazing. BTW - I got a bird dog that won't hunt. It has a really good pedigree but all it wants to do is eat bisquits and suck eggs. I'll take $100,000 for it if anyone is interested.

 

[Anonymous]

He didn't just sell it to Arabs, he sold it to Al Jazeera. Flipping al quaeda terrorists.
And 48% wanted him for president when he ran.

 

[jedstivers]

He didn't just sell it to Arabs, he sold it to Al Jazeera. Flipping al quaeda terrorists.
And 48% wanted him for president when he ran.

Well 53% wanted a al quaeda terrorist back in the White House.