DiamondSCattleCo
Well-known member
I apologize for the length of this, and some may find inappropriate for posting on an internet forum, however my outrage at the following events is near limitless right now.
June 7, 2007
Letter to the Editor
Dear Sir or Madam:
I am writing this letter in the hopes that it will inform your readers of an injustice that I see occurring within our town. I am assured that these events or events similar to these are occurring in other towns and cities across our nation.
I have friend, Bob, who's Grandmother, Ruby is having a great deal of trouble with some members of her family. It seems that last year, Gramma Ruby's second son, Jim and his wife, Alice, had a falling out. Bob is unsure of the events that proceeded this falling out, however Jim ended up on Gramma Ruby's doorstep, seeking a place to stay. Ruby, being a dutiful mother who loves her children, of course told Jim that her home would always be his home and that he was more than welcome to stay for as long as he needed.
For several months, Ruby provided Jim with hot meals, a roof over his head, and clothes on his back, since he had arrived with nothing in the way of luggage or a means to support himself. She also provided him with the necessary information to have his pension checks sent to a new box number, and took him to town to allow him to open up a new bank account with only his name on it so he would have some form of financial support. Jim is a smoker, and with no financial means, Ruby had found herself having to spring for the occasional package of cigarettes, which she could not afford on her own meager pension check.
During these months, Bob, Ruby, and other members of Ruby's family noticed that Jim's behaviour was somewhat odd, compared to the Jim of old that they had all loved. He tended to be somewhat rude, argumentative, and very forgetful. He tended to dress very inappropriately for the weather, and they all feared that he may freeze during one of his walks. They chalked this up to the stress of a marriage in trouble and tried to help him through this rough time.
Unfortunately, as time wore on, Jim's behaviour became increasingly troublesome. As I mentioned, Jim is a smoker. Until the weather became very cold, he was smoking outside Ruby's home at her request. Her lungs are 88 years old and unable to handle to sting of second hand smoke. However, once the mercury dipped down, Jim began smoking in the basement of her home, where the furnace intake blew it upstairs. Gramma Ruby found her lungs "seizing up" and her coughing eventually brought up traces of blood.
At this time, Bob intervened and kindly requested that Jim continue to smoke outside. He told Jim about the coughing and the blood; however he was met with hostility and anger. Jim insisted that he was not smoking in the house, even though Bob had walked in on him in the basement surrounded by a cloud of smoke. Not knowing what else to do, since Ruby was unwilling to evict her son into the cold, Bob installed a lock on the basement door to prevent Jim from gaining access. This satisfied Ruby, however Jim was openly resentful of the lock, and when Bob was gone, began yelling at Ruby about how he was going to bust the lock off the door with a bar. Jim never did pry the lock off the door; however he began smoking in his room, which made matters worse.
So Bob had Ruby pack up Jim's clothing, and took him back to Nipawin. Bob gave Jim the choice of being dropped off at a friends place or returning to his own home and wife. Jim chose his own home and wife, and Bob thought that was the end of it.
Two or three days later, during a -30C spell, Jim showed back up on Ruby's doorstep, wearing nothing more than a lumberjack shirt, jeans, and a pair of cowboy boots. It seemed that he had been unable to reconcile with his wife, and started walking back to the farm. He'd made it about a mile out of town when a neighbor stopped and picked him up, delivering him back to Gramma Ruby's farm house.
Unfortunately, the pattern of smoking began the next day again. And Ruby was dismayed to see Jim tearing through her cupboards searching for a cheque that he had supposedly placed there. When Ruby attempted to explain to him that he had already taken the cheque to the bank, he called her a liar and started yelling at her, even when Ruby showed him the deposit slip from the bank. He accused her of stealing his cheque, and demanded that she return his cheque to him. Eventually, Jim calmed down and went to bed.
That evening, Ruby informed Bob of the events that had transpired that day. He was concerned, but agreed with Ruby that they couldn't simply push Jim out on the road in -30 with no cold weather gear at all. They both hoped that Jim would calm down and remember that he had indeed handled his money already. And the next day, it seemed that he had.
However, two days later, Ruby returned from visiting a friend and found Jim enraged and pulling everything out of the cupboards in an attempt to find the cheque that he already taken to the bank. His anger and subsequent yelling had Ruby fearing for her safety, so she went to Bob's house that evening and he had her stay the night.
The following day, Bob placed several phone calls in the morning in an attempt to get help for Jim. It was obvious that Jim was not in his right mind and that he likely needed medical attention. Bob called the Carrot River RCMP, explaining the situation, and requesting their assistance. Unfortunately, beyond forcefully throwing Jim out of Ruby's home, they were bound by law and powerless to do anything. They suggested that Bob contact the Nipawin Mental Health line and attempt to get them to admit Jim. Bob found that Nipawin Mental Health could not do such a thing until a court of law judged that Jim was unsafe to himself and others around him. Bob contacted the courts, and that afternoon, a judge heard his testimony. The judge ruled against involuntarily admitting Jim to the hospital, due to insufficient grounds. Bob was informed that Ruby herself would have to approach Jim and evict him. If he chose not to go, then Ruby could call the RCMP and have him forcibly removed from her home. This seemed to Ruby to be a cruel thing to do to her middle son, decided to go home and take her chances.
Bob asked her to wait, and he would have a talk with Jim. Bob approached Jim, and told him that Ruby was afraid of him in his current condition. Bob was met with disbelief and hostility, so Bob gave Jim two choices: Quit smoking in the house and quit yelling and screaming at Ruby or leave. Jim decided to leave, donned on his jack shirt and cowboy boots and began walking down the drive. The mercury was sitting at -25C that day.
Gramma Ruby was very concerned about Jim's health, however she did find out a couple days later that someone picked him up and delivered him to his home. Several days after this, she received the first of many abusive phone calls from Jim, demanding his money be returned to him. At this time, he began accusing Ruby of emptying out his bank account as well. The phone calls continued well into the New Year, even though Ruby had long stopped answering them. Bob found out that Jim and his wife were telling every person in town that would listen that his grandmother had stolen Jim's money, and that they had plans on taking Ruby to court for it. Thankfully, most people in town were intelligent enough to realize that it is next to impossible for someone to cash another's cheque and that it is completely impossible to walk into a bank and remove money from another's bank account.
Bob decided to leave things alone, and eventually the phone calls quit. However, in the last week of May, Gramma Ruby received two dirty and crinkled notes in the mail. These notes were signed "a friend of Jims" and called her an old bitch and stating that someday she would get her ass kicked for what she had done. Ruby immediately went to the Nipawin RCMP with her notes, and was informed that in the law there was really nothing they could do about it. She was informed that Jim's son had been in twice before to register a complaint about the theft of money and the RCMP officer suspected it was Jim's son who had written the notes. Unfortunately, real life does not echo CSI on TV, and fingerprints on the notes, if any could be recovered at all, would be completely worthless. The RCMP officer promised that the next time Jim's son was in the office; they would sit down with him and have a long talk about the notes. Beyond that though, their hands were tied by the law, no matter how much they would like to help this 88 year old widow.
Bob found this situation ludicrous, and called the Carrot River RCMP, who are in his (and Ruby's) jurisdiction. While on the phone, Bob spoke with a kind police officer who told him much the same thing as the Nipawin RCMP had told Ruby the previous day. The police officer was personally outraged by the treatment being handed to Ruby, especially after her kindness, however the law was quite clear. The notes that said she would "get her ass kicked someday" would be thrown out in a court of law, even if the RCMP could prove it was Jim's son or another member of the family who wrote and sent them. The wording was simply not strong enough to constitute a serious threat. The RCMP could not even curb the slander being spread around town as there were no laws that it violated. The RCMP officer did volunteer to call Jim and Jim's son to inform them that Ruby desired no contact from them at all. This was above and beyond this police officer's duty, and Bob was grateful to him for rendering what little assistance the law allowed.
And that is where the story currently ends. When Bob told me his tale, I was stunned on so many levels that I hardly knew where to begin.
First, that Ruby was unable to secure any help for her ailing son mystifies me. That his act of attempting a 10 mile walk in -35C weather was not considered remotely unsafe behaviour, especially when combined with his irrational anger and obvious forgetfulness. While I recognize that our medical system is seriously overloaded and our court system doubly so, should common sense not eventually prevail?
Second that the law, while not condoning, is certainly not effective in limiting Jim and his family's slander and abuse. Should an 88 year old mother of three not have some assurance that she will be able to live out her years in relative peace be safe from threats to her health and well being? Has our society become so "enlightened" that criminal conduct should now be tolerated for fear of trodding on their supposed god-given right to abuse their fellow man?
And finally, has our society "progressed" to the point where family values have become so eroded as to be non-existent? As I write this letter, I am reminded of the abuse that Ruby suffered at the hands of Alice's sister and husband (also Ruby's first son) a few years ago. Her kindness in allowing them to place a home on her farm, while not receiving a nickel for the power bill in twenty years or single red cent for their home's substantial property taxes in 30 years was returned often with open hostility. I am unsure of how a family can be so utterly classless and applaud the act of a 38 year old grandchild (or other friend or family member) threatening to kick his 88 year old's ass. While I certainly don't mean to paint Ruby as a saint, I think that people should also realize that Ruby's first husband died when both of these sons were very young, and that Ruby raised them on her own for close to 20 years, eking out a meager existence during the second World War and throughout the Fifties and early Sixties.
I have rambled on enough with this letter. I only hope that your audience can identify with Gramma Ruby, and think of how they would like to be treated when they enter their golden years. Perhaps if enough of us decide these actions are reprehensible, our elected representatives will take notice and do something to ensure that a repeat of these events will be met with punishment.
Sincerely,
Rod
June 7, 2007
Letter to the Editor
Dear Sir or Madam:
I am writing this letter in the hopes that it will inform your readers of an injustice that I see occurring within our town. I am assured that these events or events similar to these are occurring in other towns and cities across our nation.
I have friend, Bob, who's Grandmother, Ruby is having a great deal of trouble with some members of her family. It seems that last year, Gramma Ruby's second son, Jim and his wife, Alice, had a falling out. Bob is unsure of the events that proceeded this falling out, however Jim ended up on Gramma Ruby's doorstep, seeking a place to stay. Ruby, being a dutiful mother who loves her children, of course told Jim that her home would always be his home and that he was more than welcome to stay for as long as he needed.
For several months, Ruby provided Jim with hot meals, a roof over his head, and clothes on his back, since he had arrived with nothing in the way of luggage or a means to support himself. She also provided him with the necessary information to have his pension checks sent to a new box number, and took him to town to allow him to open up a new bank account with only his name on it so he would have some form of financial support. Jim is a smoker, and with no financial means, Ruby had found herself having to spring for the occasional package of cigarettes, which she could not afford on her own meager pension check.
During these months, Bob, Ruby, and other members of Ruby's family noticed that Jim's behaviour was somewhat odd, compared to the Jim of old that they had all loved. He tended to be somewhat rude, argumentative, and very forgetful. He tended to dress very inappropriately for the weather, and they all feared that he may freeze during one of his walks. They chalked this up to the stress of a marriage in trouble and tried to help him through this rough time.
Unfortunately, as time wore on, Jim's behaviour became increasingly troublesome. As I mentioned, Jim is a smoker. Until the weather became very cold, he was smoking outside Ruby's home at her request. Her lungs are 88 years old and unable to handle to sting of second hand smoke. However, once the mercury dipped down, Jim began smoking in the basement of her home, where the furnace intake blew it upstairs. Gramma Ruby found her lungs "seizing up" and her coughing eventually brought up traces of blood.
At this time, Bob intervened and kindly requested that Jim continue to smoke outside. He told Jim about the coughing and the blood; however he was met with hostility and anger. Jim insisted that he was not smoking in the house, even though Bob had walked in on him in the basement surrounded by a cloud of smoke. Not knowing what else to do, since Ruby was unwilling to evict her son into the cold, Bob installed a lock on the basement door to prevent Jim from gaining access. This satisfied Ruby, however Jim was openly resentful of the lock, and when Bob was gone, began yelling at Ruby about how he was going to bust the lock off the door with a bar. Jim never did pry the lock off the door; however he began smoking in his room, which made matters worse.
So Bob had Ruby pack up Jim's clothing, and took him back to Nipawin. Bob gave Jim the choice of being dropped off at a friends place or returning to his own home and wife. Jim chose his own home and wife, and Bob thought that was the end of it.
Two or three days later, during a -30C spell, Jim showed back up on Ruby's doorstep, wearing nothing more than a lumberjack shirt, jeans, and a pair of cowboy boots. It seemed that he had been unable to reconcile with his wife, and started walking back to the farm. He'd made it about a mile out of town when a neighbor stopped and picked him up, delivering him back to Gramma Ruby's farm house.
Unfortunately, the pattern of smoking began the next day again. And Ruby was dismayed to see Jim tearing through her cupboards searching for a cheque that he had supposedly placed there. When Ruby attempted to explain to him that he had already taken the cheque to the bank, he called her a liar and started yelling at her, even when Ruby showed him the deposit slip from the bank. He accused her of stealing his cheque, and demanded that she return his cheque to him. Eventually, Jim calmed down and went to bed.
That evening, Ruby informed Bob of the events that had transpired that day. He was concerned, but agreed with Ruby that they couldn't simply push Jim out on the road in -30 with no cold weather gear at all. They both hoped that Jim would calm down and remember that he had indeed handled his money already. And the next day, it seemed that he had.
However, two days later, Ruby returned from visiting a friend and found Jim enraged and pulling everything out of the cupboards in an attempt to find the cheque that he already taken to the bank. His anger and subsequent yelling had Ruby fearing for her safety, so she went to Bob's house that evening and he had her stay the night.
The following day, Bob placed several phone calls in the morning in an attempt to get help for Jim. It was obvious that Jim was not in his right mind and that he likely needed medical attention. Bob called the Carrot River RCMP, explaining the situation, and requesting their assistance. Unfortunately, beyond forcefully throwing Jim out of Ruby's home, they were bound by law and powerless to do anything. They suggested that Bob contact the Nipawin Mental Health line and attempt to get them to admit Jim. Bob found that Nipawin Mental Health could not do such a thing until a court of law judged that Jim was unsafe to himself and others around him. Bob contacted the courts, and that afternoon, a judge heard his testimony. The judge ruled against involuntarily admitting Jim to the hospital, due to insufficient grounds. Bob was informed that Ruby herself would have to approach Jim and evict him. If he chose not to go, then Ruby could call the RCMP and have him forcibly removed from her home. This seemed to Ruby to be a cruel thing to do to her middle son, decided to go home and take her chances.
Bob asked her to wait, and he would have a talk with Jim. Bob approached Jim, and told him that Ruby was afraid of him in his current condition. Bob was met with disbelief and hostility, so Bob gave Jim two choices: Quit smoking in the house and quit yelling and screaming at Ruby or leave. Jim decided to leave, donned on his jack shirt and cowboy boots and began walking down the drive. The mercury was sitting at -25C that day.
Gramma Ruby was very concerned about Jim's health, however she did find out a couple days later that someone picked him up and delivered him to his home. Several days after this, she received the first of many abusive phone calls from Jim, demanding his money be returned to him. At this time, he began accusing Ruby of emptying out his bank account as well. The phone calls continued well into the New Year, even though Ruby had long stopped answering them. Bob found out that Jim and his wife were telling every person in town that would listen that his grandmother had stolen Jim's money, and that they had plans on taking Ruby to court for it. Thankfully, most people in town were intelligent enough to realize that it is next to impossible for someone to cash another's cheque and that it is completely impossible to walk into a bank and remove money from another's bank account.
Bob decided to leave things alone, and eventually the phone calls quit. However, in the last week of May, Gramma Ruby received two dirty and crinkled notes in the mail. These notes were signed "a friend of Jims" and called her an old bitch and stating that someday she would get her ass kicked for what she had done. Ruby immediately went to the Nipawin RCMP with her notes, and was informed that in the law there was really nothing they could do about it. She was informed that Jim's son had been in twice before to register a complaint about the theft of money and the RCMP officer suspected it was Jim's son who had written the notes. Unfortunately, real life does not echo CSI on TV, and fingerprints on the notes, if any could be recovered at all, would be completely worthless. The RCMP officer promised that the next time Jim's son was in the office; they would sit down with him and have a long talk about the notes. Beyond that though, their hands were tied by the law, no matter how much they would like to help this 88 year old widow.
Bob found this situation ludicrous, and called the Carrot River RCMP, who are in his (and Ruby's) jurisdiction. While on the phone, Bob spoke with a kind police officer who told him much the same thing as the Nipawin RCMP had told Ruby the previous day. The police officer was personally outraged by the treatment being handed to Ruby, especially after her kindness, however the law was quite clear. The notes that said she would "get her ass kicked someday" would be thrown out in a court of law, even if the RCMP could prove it was Jim's son or another member of the family who wrote and sent them. The wording was simply not strong enough to constitute a serious threat. The RCMP could not even curb the slander being spread around town as there were no laws that it violated. The RCMP officer did volunteer to call Jim and Jim's son to inform them that Ruby desired no contact from them at all. This was above and beyond this police officer's duty, and Bob was grateful to him for rendering what little assistance the law allowed.
And that is where the story currently ends. When Bob told me his tale, I was stunned on so many levels that I hardly knew where to begin.
First, that Ruby was unable to secure any help for her ailing son mystifies me. That his act of attempting a 10 mile walk in -35C weather was not considered remotely unsafe behaviour, especially when combined with his irrational anger and obvious forgetfulness. While I recognize that our medical system is seriously overloaded and our court system doubly so, should common sense not eventually prevail?
Second that the law, while not condoning, is certainly not effective in limiting Jim and his family's slander and abuse. Should an 88 year old mother of three not have some assurance that she will be able to live out her years in relative peace be safe from threats to her health and well being? Has our society become so "enlightened" that criminal conduct should now be tolerated for fear of trodding on their supposed god-given right to abuse their fellow man?
And finally, has our society "progressed" to the point where family values have become so eroded as to be non-existent? As I write this letter, I am reminded of the abuse that Ruby suffered at the hands of Alice's sister and husband (also Ruby's first son) a few years ago. Her kindness in allowing them to place a home on her farm, while not receiving a nickel for the power bill in twenty years or single red cent for their home's substantial property taxes in 30 years was returned often with open hostility. I am unsure of how a family can be so utterly classless and applaud the act of a 38 year old grandchild (or other friend or family member) threatening to kick his 88 year old's ass. While I certainly don't mean to paint Ruby as a saint, I think that people should also realize that Ruby's first husband died when both of these sons were very young, and that Ruby raised them on her own for close to 20 years, eking out a meager existence during the second World War and throughout the Fifties and early Sixties.
I have rambled on enough with this letter. I only hope that your audience can identify with Gramma Ruby, and think of how they would like to be treated when they enter their golden years. Perhaps if enough of us decide these actions are reprehensible, our elected representatives will take notice and do something to ensure that a repeat of these events will be met with punishment.
Sincerely,
Rod
