TnWI
Well-known member
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology
courses. She
started
her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're
stupid, stand up!"
After a few seconds, Little Davie stood up. The
teacher said, "Do you
think
you're stupid, Little Davie?"
"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all
by yourself!"
************************
Little Davie watched, fascinated, as his mother
smoothed cold cream on
her
face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.
"To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then
began removing
the
cream with a tissue.
"What's the matter?" asked Little Davie. "Giving up?"
*************************
A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned
that his students
might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because
of the Christmas
season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure
they understood
that the
birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew
up, etc. So he
asked his
class, "Where is Jesus today?"
Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
Little Davie, waving his hand furiously, blurted out,
"I know! I know!
He's in
our bathroom!"
The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very
long seconds.
Finally, he
gathered his wits and asked Little Davie how he knew
this.
Little Davie said, "Well... every morning, my father
gets up, bangs on
the
bathroom door, and yells, "Jesus Christ, are you still
in there?!"
*********************************
The math teacher saw that little Davie wasn't paying
attention in
class. She
called on him and said, "Davie! What are 2 and 4 and
28 and 44?"
Little Davie quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the
Cartoon Network!"
*********************************
Little Davie's kindergarten class was on a field trip
to their local
police
station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin
board of the 10
most
wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a
picture and asked
if it
really was the photo of a wanted person.
"Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very
badly to capture
him."
Little Davie asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you
took his
picture?"
**********************************
Little Davie attended a horse auction with his father.
He watched as
his
father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up
and down the
horse's
legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Davie
asked, "Dad, why are
you
doing that?"
His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I
have to make
sure that
they are healthy and in good shape before I buy."
Davie, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS
guy wants to buy
Mom."
courses. She
started
her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're
stupid, stand up!"
After a few seconds, Little Davie stood up. The
teacher said, "Do you
think
you're stupid, Little Davie?"
"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all
by yourself!"
************************
Little Davie watched, fascinated, as his mother
smoothed cold cream on
her
face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.
"To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then
began removing
the
cream with a tissue.
"What's the matter?" asked Little Davie. "Giving up?"
*************************
A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned
that his students
might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because
of the Christmas
season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure
they understood
that the
birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew
up, etc. So he
asked his
class, "Where is Jesus today?"
Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
Little Davie, waving his hand furiously, blurted out,
"I know! I know!
He's in
our bathroom!"
The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very
long seconds.
Finally, he
gathered his wits and asked Little Davie how he knew
this.
Little Davie said, "Well... every morning, my father
gets up, bangs on
the
bathroom door, and yells, "Jesus Christ, are you still
in there?!"
*********************************
The math teacher saw that little Davie wasn't paying
attention in
class. She
called on him and said, "Davie! What are 2 and 4 and
28 and 44?"
Little Davie quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the
Cartoon Network!"
*********************************
Little Davie's kindergarten class was on a field trip
to their local
police
station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin
board of the 10
most
wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a
picture and asked
if it
really was the photo of a wanted person.
"Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very
badly to capture
him."
Little Davie asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you
took his
picture?"
**********************************
Little Davie attended a horse auction with his father.
He watched as
his
father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up
and down the
horse's
legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Davie
asked, "Dad, why are
you
doing that?"
His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I
have to make
sure that
they are healthy and in good shape before I buy."
Davie, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS
guy wants to buy
Mom."
