I bought a few acres

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Bigfoot

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Bought it a few weeks ago actually. Still can't decide if it was the right move or not. I bought my parents place (81 acres, several nice buildings, and well fenced), and gave them a life time estate. I could never encourage them to do any estate planning. I've never understood why. After seeing my mother in laws health fail, I could think of a some scenarios where the farm was lost to that type of thing. If I were to inherit it, I would have inherited it with my brother. He and I get along, but I've seen relationships dissolve pretty quickly when money is concerned.

It just seemed like the best thing to do. Gives them cash now, so they can maybe enjoy life more. Gives me piece of mind, that later I'm not embroiled in trying to hold on to it. Feels funny though. Very strange actually. It's hard to explain. I've actually started threads about it, but never submitted them (plus, an Internet forum is an unlikely place for a discussion like this). I feel partly guilty, and partly upset that they wouldn't take any measures to plan ahead. At the end of the day, the land held sentimental value to me, and I did what I felt was best at the time. I'm sure to some extent, they feel awkward as well. This is just a situation, that I never pictured myself in. Thoughts?
 

Fire Sweep Ranch

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Good for you!
In short, we were left "in a pickle" so to speak last summer when my MIL passed. She owned half of the home and land she shared with her daughter (and hubby's sister). She told hubby numerous times that he gets his half of her half (quarter) when she passes, but hubby was uncomfortable talking about it and never followed through with paperwork. Long story short, he got nothing.
Live and learn. You made a wise choice.
 

mwj

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As long as there is not a fallout with your brother, I think it was a wise decision.
 

TN Cattle Man

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mwj":1z6kv4ux said:
As long as there is not a fallout with your brother, I think it was a wise decision.
This was first thoughts as well... was your brother good with you purchasing the property? I am all for "keeping it in the family" as they say. Good for you Bigfoot!!
 

TCRanch

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Congrats, Bigfoot! Friends/semi-neighbors of ours did a similar thing. Grandma is still living in the house but they are fixing it up and making improvements on the pastures/equipment. None of the other kids seemed interested or really had anything to do with cattle/farming so it actually made it easier on Grandma and when she passes they will eventually move in.
 

TexasBred

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Bigfoot":e1u5270p said:
Bought it a few weeks ago actually. Still can't decide if it was the right move or not. I bought my parents place (81 acres, several nice buildings, and well fenced), and gave them a life time estate. I could never encourage them to do any estate planning. I've never understood why. After seeing my mother in laws health fail, I could think of a some scenarios where the farm was lost to that type of thing. If I were to inherit it, I would have inherited it with my brother. He and I get along, but I've seen relationships dissolve pretty quickly when money is concerned.

It just seemed like the best thing to do. Gives them cash now, so they can maybe enjoy life more. Gives me piece of mind, that later I'm not embroiled in trying to hold on to it. Feels funny though. Very strange actually. It's hard to explain. I've actually started threads about it, but never submitted them (plus, an Internet forum is an unlikely place for a discussion like this). I feel partly guilty, and partly upset that they wouldn't take any measures to plan ahead. At the end of the day, the land held sentimental value to me, and I did what I felt was best at the time. I'm sure to some extent, they feel awkward as well. This is just a situation, that I never pictured myself in. Thoughts?
I understand the odd feelings but hope you can get rid of them. Until mom and dad die just think of it as Mom and Dad's place and let it go at that. ;-)
 

Bright Raven

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TexasBred":qmz203b8 said:
I understand the odd feelings but hope you can get rid of them. Until mom and dad die just think of it as Mom and Dad's place and let it go at that. ;-)

Mom and dad or the odd feelings? I think you mean the odd feelings. Lol
 

Farm Fence Solutions

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I thought you guys said that reverse mortgages were a scam? lol Troy, there isn't any reason it should be awkward, as it seems to be a wining situation for all parties. I hope that my folks live long enough to sell every last asset, and spend all the cash. I'm sure that the same would be a blessing for you too.
 
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Bigfoot

Bigfoot

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TN Cattle Man":3jy77zae said:
mwj":3jy77zae said:
As long as there is not a fallout with your brother, I think it was a wise decision.
This was first thoughts as well... was your brother good with you purchasing the property? I am all for "keeping it in the family" as they say. Good for you Bigfoot!!

I talked to him, before I did. He said he was fine with it. He farms a little. The extinuating thing for me, was that it joined my place, would make my place lay funny without it (if that even makes sense), and I could see it going up for auction someday. I guess I felt better buying it under these circumstances, than bidding on it at some point in the future at an auction sale.
 
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Bigfoot

Bigfoot

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Farm Fence Solutions":255o5mba said:
I thought you guys said that reverse mortgages were a scam? lol Troy, there isn't any reason it should be awkward, as it seems to be a wining situation for all parties. I hope that my folks live long enough to sell every last asset, and spend all the cash. I'm sure that the same would be a blessing for you too.

I frequently say the same thing.
 

slick4591

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Good on you, BF. I was prepared to do that with my dad until he just offered it up when he remarried. I wanted to buy it outright, but he gave half to my brother. So far it's worked out just fine. My cousin will offer an additional 4 acres that my aunt has when she passes on.
 

Lucky

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Sounds like a good deal for everyone involved Bigfoot. You were able to help your parents out and the land being attached to you is a bonus. I hope you and yor brother don’t have any bad feelings about the deal.
 

boondocks

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The financial whiz-kids may well say differently but my only caveat would be for your folks to still go ahead and talk to an estate-planning expert (good luck, right?). I guess if they both have a life estate maybe they don't care about losing their homestead exemption (?), but I'd still want to make sure sufficient assets were preserved for Parent A if, say, Parent B needed lengthy medical care, nursing home etc (since they have likely lost (correct me if I'm wrong, CT-finance-folks) the ability to shield a certain amount of assets via their home ownership. Just a thought. Otherwise, I think you have done everything you could do under the circumstances. Congratulations!
 
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Bigfoot

Bigfoot

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boondocks":ejnxrae0 said:
The financial whiz-kids may well say differently but my only caveat would be for your folks to still go ahead and talk to an estate-planning expert (good luck, right?). I guess if they both have a life estate maybe they don't care about losing their homestead exemption (?), but I'd still want to make sure sufficient assets were preserved for Parent A if, say, Parent B needed lengthy medical care, nursing home etc (since they have likely lost (correct me if I'm wrong, CT-finance-folks) the ability to shield a certain amount of assets via their home ownership. Just a thought. Otherwise, I think you have done everything you could do under the circumstances. Congratulations!

They will not lift one finger, nor entertain the thought of any type of financial planning.
 

pdfangus

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Good Job all the way around....
Congratulations on having the ability and the forethought to preserve part of your heritage and do the right thing by your folks
 
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Bigfoot

Bigfoot

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Here will come the fall out. I started this thread, in hopes of a little therapy. If that comes in the form of tough love, then I will have to take it.

I used awkward in my original post. It does feel awkward, so I can't say that was a lie. I do have a bitter feeling as well. I'm not even sure if that captures how I feel. Their nice people, that lived on optimism. They reached a point, where the light at the end of the optimism tunnel, just became so small, that another plan had to be hatched.

In the end, I would have to admit, that I am happier owning the place, than I would be by not owning it. I do have a tremendous amount of guilt, because of my bitter feelings. There are probably better avenues, to seek council. I just thought, maybe someone here had some insight, that a nonfarm person would not.
 

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