Managing Moody Seniors ?

[Stocker Steve]

I have connections with several semi retired farm operators who are not aging well. When they feel their chronic health issues, they get depressed and moody, which they then take our on who ever is close. Often on care givers or business partners. Any tips on weathering this? I find myself avoiding them...

 

[Till-Hill]

When you find an answer let me know. Boss can be best guy in world then just piss and moan about a perfect job for no reason. He is really hard on the rest of our help. Makes stuff up and then is fine. Some days you just got to walk away.

 

[dun]

Some days you just got to walk away.

As a moody senior, I think this is great advice. For BOTH partys

 

[Till-Hill]

It really is all you can do Dun. I've been here 15.5 years. I could sit and argue or leave and grab a beer and laugh about it. Most times I choose the later option.

 

[Aaron]

Avoid them and you'll stay young longer.

 

[bball]

Haldol, Ativan, Geodon...works wonders! :hide:

Edit to add: sometimes they're just backed up, so some prune juice and milk of mag goes a long way to change their spirits!

Seriously though, often the frustration comes from having to deal with physical limitations of an aging body, while the mind is as sharp as it ever was. Goes along the lines of " youth is wasted on the young". Older i get, the more i believe this to be true.

 

[bball]

Dealing with it isnt easy, requires A LOT of patience and empathy. I bite my tongue a lot and try to be respectful when voicing concern over a ' rough approach'. Often times, they dont even realize they were being nasty, until you carefully, and respectfully point it out. And there are some who know theyre nasty and just dont give a rip. Can't do much with them. I feel like some of them like to test people to see who has some sack and who doesnt. They do it for entertainment, or attention, or just because they can.

 

[Stocker Steve]

I have not had much success with respectful feedback. Two are in denial and wanted to argue, the other avoided all issues and examples by saying him did not remember. I have taken to discussing some situations with my wife. You have occasionally moody, and then you have toxic.

 

[hillbilly beef man]

In my experence just say ok and go on about your Buisness is the best policy. You are not going to change their mind by arguing, and they will forget what they told you by the next day anyway.

 

[lavacarancher]

Put yourself in their shoes for a few minutes. They can't do for themselves what they used to do and that's frustrating. They have to depend on someone else doing everything for them and thats frustrating. And when something does get done it's not like you wanted it and that's frustrating. Can't build fence so you have to depend on someone else to do it and when it's done it is as crooked as a snakes back . Can't eat the things they used to eat and that's …. You get the picture. Sound like the voice of experience? Well, it is. Old age SUCKS so if you can't handle it f___ off and let us die in peace.

 

[dun]

Put yourself in their shoes for a few minutes. They can't do for themselves what they used to do and that's frustrating. They have to depend on someone else doing everything for them and thats frustrating. And when something does get done it's not like you wanted it and that's frustrating. Can't build fence so you have to depend on someone else to do it and when it's done it is as crooked as a snakes back . Can't eat the things they used to eat and that's …. You get the picture. Sound like the voice of experience? Well, it is. Old age SUCKS so if you can't handle it f___ off and let us die in peace.

HEAR, HEAR!

 

[ram]

And I've been called grumpy. Dieing is not peaceful, death is peace.

 

[bball]

Put yourself in their shoes for a few minutes. They can't do for themselves what they used to do and that's frustrating. They have to depend on someone else doing everything for them and thats frustrating. And when something does get done it's not like you wanted it and that's frustrating. Can't build fence so you have to depend on someone else to do it and when it's done it is as crooked as a snakes back . Can't eat the things they used to eat and that's …. You get the picture. Sound like the voice of experience? Well, it is. Old age SUCKS so if you can't handle it f___ off and let us die in peace.

This is just about a perfect a response as a fella could hope for! :clap: :clap:

 

[lavacarancher]

And I've been called grumpy. Dieing is not peaceful, death is peace.

Depends on how you die.

 

[dun]

And I've been called grumpy. Dieing is not peaceful, death is peace.

Depends on how you die.

Like the guy said, I want to just die in my sleep like my grandad did. Not like the people in his car at the time that were yelling and screaming!

 

[greybeard]

Put yourself in their shoes for a few minutes. They can't do for themselves what they used to do and that's frustrating. They have to depend on someone else doing everything for them and thats frustrating. And when something does get done it's not like you wanted it and that's frustrating. Can't build fence so you have to depend on someone else to do it and when it's done it is as crooked as a snakes back . Can't eat the things they used to eat and that's …. You get the picture. Sound like the voice of experience? Well, it is. Old age SUCKS so if you can't handle it f___ off and let us die in peace.

This is just about a perfect a response as a fella could hope for! :clap: :clap:

Yup!!
I have one brother in law, that is physically impaired--he never could drive a nail without bending it, or cut a straight line, but now, can't breathe well, can't walk 20 yards without having to sit down but his mind is still fairly sharp. He 'knows' what and how he wants to do things--just can't do it himself.

My other brother in law is still physically well except the usual bad knee that bothers him sometimes-but he has Alzheimer bad. Can't remember from one minute to the next what he was doing or where he's going---when I was real young, I considered him the smartest man I ever knew.

Which is worse, I don't know. Being able, but not knowing how-----or knowing how, but no longer able??
I got a little taste of it when I had my bypass surgery...it sure ain't fun depending on the wife or friends doing everything for ya, or sitting on the porch, looking out and seeing things you KNOW needs to be done and no one around you seems to see them or even notice them....

 

[lavacarancher]

Put yourself in their shoes for a few minutes. They can't do for themselves what they used to do and that's frustrating. They have to depend on someone else doing everything for them and thats frustrating. And when something does get done it's not like you wanted it and that's frustrating. Can't build fence so you have to depend on someone else to do it and when it's done it is as crooked as a snakes back . Can't eat the things they used to eat and that's …. You get the picture. Sound like the voice of experience? Well, it is. Old age SUCKS so if you can't handle it f___ off and let us die in peace.

This is just about a perfect a response as a fella could hope for! :clap: :clap:

Yup!!
I have one brother in law, that is physically impaired--he never could drive a nail without bending it, or cut a straight line, but now, can't breathe well, can't walk 20 yards without having to sit down but his mind is still fairly sharp. He 'knows' what and how he wants to do things--just can't do it himself.

My other brother in law is still physically well except the usual bad knee that bothers him sometimes-but he has Alzheimer bad. Can't remember from one minute to the next what he was doing or where he's going---when I was real young, I considered him the smartest man I ever knew.

Which is worse, I don't know. Being able, but not knowing how-----or knowing how, but no longer able??
I got a little taste of it when I had my bypass surgery...it sure ain't fun depending on the wife or friends doing everything for ya, or sitting on the porch, looking out and seeing things you KNOW needs to be done and no one around you seems to see them or even notice them....

Exactly! Well said Grey.

 

[TCRanch]

Put yourself in their shoes for a few minutes. They can't do for themselves what they used to do and that's frustrating. They have to depend on someone else doing everything for them and thats frustrating. And when something does get done it's not like you wanted it and that's frustrating. Can't build fence so you have to depend on someone else to do it and when it's done it is as crooked as a snakes back . Can't eat the things they used to eat and that's …. You get the picture. Sound like the voice of experience? Well, it is. Old age SUCKS so if you can't handle it f___ off and let us die in peace.

Lavacarancher, I agree with the others, this is truly the point. I'm not sure what qualifies as a "senior" but that's exactly what happened when my husband had shoulder surgery (3 times!). He was essentially neutered; not only did I have to take care of him but he had to watch me physically struggle with a lot of the labor (he's huge - I'm not). He got a little testy, I developed muscles I never knew existed, had a couple unfortunate tractor incidents, I began to truly appreciate all he does, he was actually proud of me, we got through it & are stronger for it BUT it also gave me a better understanding & patience when dealing with my father & other "moody seniors" because they're not going to heal in 4 months. So a big Thank You to all the Seniors (moody or not) that have taught us, lead us, advised us and are still ornery as h#ll.

 

[Kingfisher]

Agh come on now .....what's a "tractor incident?"

 

[TCRanch]

Agh come on now .....what's a "tractor incident?"

Ummmm . .