IluvABbeef
Well-known member
- Joined
- Mar 29, 2006
- Messages
- 3,630
You know you are getting old when—A sexy thing catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
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A woman’s rule of thumb: if it has tires or testicles, you know you are going to have a certain amount of trouble with it.
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It is good to be a woman:
No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo.
We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
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I am out of estrogen and I have a gun!
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An advantage of getting older is now when you decide to go bra-less, it pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
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The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it.
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If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck?
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If you think you’re too small to have an impact, try going to sleep with a mosquito in the room.
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Patience is the ability to let your light shine after your fuse has blown.
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Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
---------------------------------------------------------
A woman’s rule of thumb: if it has tires or testicles, you know you are going to have a certain amount of trouble with it.
-----------------------------------------------------------
It is good to be a woman:
No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo.
We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
-----------------------------------------------------------
I am out of estrogen and I have a gun!
------------------------------------------------------------
An advantage of getting older is now when you decide to go bra-less, it pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
------------------------------------------------------------
The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it.
------------------------------------------------------------
If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck?
------------------------------------------------------------
If you think you’re too small to have an impact, try going to sleep with a mosquito in the room.
------------------------------------------------------------
Patience is the ability to let your light shine after your fuse has blown.
------------------------------------------------------------
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
