Doesn't seem right.

[Ky hills]

This hospital experience has been a nightmare for my mother and for our family. We collectively haven't had a lot of hospital stays but a few over the years. Usually only minor instances, associated with any given stay, and certainly nothing reported to a supervisor.
This time around has been very different, I attribute some of it to Mama being unable to get up on her own and varying states of confusion due to the strokes. She had never been one to complain about her treatment and has always been overall complementary of medical staff anywhere she has been. She has repeatly told us about being handled roughly, and of being hurt by some. She cites experienced during scans of having her arm hurt from being held. She says they just grab you and throw you around. We have witnessed a nurse or tech take her hand and pull her to move her, the hand was sore and covered in a major bruise from attempts at inserting an iv. My wife called his attention at first he denied it but then apologized and proceeded to tell her how many years experience he had. A friend has been staying some overnight, and saw instances of nurses coming in and grabbing her abruptly to wake her and scaring her in the process. Some are very impatient with her in spite of knowing that she has had strokes and it takes her a bit to focus. If my wife had not been there quite a bit and prompted them she would have laid in the bed most likely. They don't want to get her to a potty chair and want to shove a bed pan under her. She is sore from not being cleaned properly. My wife had to take it upon herself to clean her, and then had to ask several times for cream to treat the sores. Last night we walked in the room to find a nurse and a tech standing over her , while she was sideways in the bed with her feet jammed against the foot board, and her head leaning down to her shoulder. While the nurse was ramming a thermometer in her mouth. She couldn't get it to work and eventually said oh it's because I just gave her water and it's not reading. The backstory is she was likely throwing that up to us for being concerned that she hadn't been given anything to drink. She is easily dehydrated and when someone isn't there to see that she drinks it can be bad for her quickly. They were going to leave her dirty arguing that she was clean. I know that they have many to care for, and don't have time for a lot of personal attention but I do think some could do better. Certainly some could be more kind and gentle, giving an explanation to her of what they are doing and by giving her time to react and try to move along with them.

 

[sstterry]

You need to get her moved!

 

[Ky hills]

You need to get her moved!

I agree, she is supposed to be released today to a rehab facility. They told us early on after admitting her that a case worker would come see us and discuss the rehab and other things. That was Friday night, and yesterday Monday at 4 pm she finally called and said she would be being released in 2 to 3 days and for us to decide on a rehab. They were going to place her over an hours drive away if we didn't choose. We told her we would get back with her this morning. As we wanted to look around and tour a couple places that had been recommended, she agreed. Fast forward to this morning she calls again saying she will be released today and we have to find somewhere to take her to immediately. Just disgusted all the way around with that hospital experience.

 

[sstterry]

You need to get her moved!

I agree, she is supposed to be released today to a rehab facility. They told us early on after admitting her that a case worker would come see us and discuss the rehab and other things. That was Friday night, and yesterday Monday at 4 pm she finally called and said she would be being released in 2 to 3 days and for us to decide on a rehab. They were going to place her over an hours drive away if we didn't choose. We told her we would get back with her this morning. As we wanted to look around and tour a couple places that had been recommended, she agreed. Fast forward to this morning she calls again saying she will be released today and we have to find somewhere to take her to immediately. Just disgusted all the way around with that hospital experience.

That is just not right!

 

[True Grit Farms]

As much as the hospital charges the service should be second to none. You need to write this all down and have a sit down with the hospital manager, after she is released.

 

[greybeard]

You need to get her moved!

I agree, she is supposed to be released today to a rehab facility. They told us early on after admitting her that a case worker would come see us and discuss the rehab and other things. That was Friday night, and yesterday Monday at 4 pm she finally called and said she would be being released in 2 to 3 days and for us to decide on a rehab. They were going to place her over an hours drive away if we didn't choose. We told her we would get back with her this morning. As we wanted to look around and tour a couple places that had been recommended, she agreed. Fast forward to this morning she calls again saying she will be released today and we have to find somewhere to take her to immediately. Just disgusted all the way around with that hospital experience.

What the doctors want and what the hospital wants are often 2 different things.
I suspect, that what private ins or medicare will and won't pay for at the hospital is dictating the timeline.....tho it could be they have a shortage of beds I suppose...

 

[Bright Raven]

You need to get her moved!

I agree, she is supposed to be released today to a rehab facility. They told us early on after admitting her that a case worker would come see us and discuss the rehab and other things. That was Friday night, and yesterday Monday at 4 pm she finally called and said she would be being released in 2 to 3 days and for us to decide on a rehab. They were going to place her over an hours drive away if we didn't choose. We told her we would get back with her this morning. As we wanted to look around and tour a couple places that had been recommended, she agreed. Fast forward to this morning she calls again saying she will be released today and we have to find somewhere to take her to immediately. Just disgusted all the way around with that hospital experience.

We experienced some of what you have with mom and dad. Mom and Dad were not abused but their advanced age certainly impacted how medical and nursing care services treated them.

When the medical professionals see a person in their 90s, I think they say to themselves, "The old grey mare ain't what she use to be". They seem to discredit them because they are headed to the boneyard.

I actually understand the concept but it stinks when you see someone who nurtured you being treated like a tire with no tread left. Compassion is rare!

 

[JMJ Farms]

I've got a couple of comments

1) I don't feel she is being cared for properly based on your story.

2) Hospital experiences are very rarely, if ever, pleasant. Vince is correct. Care should be second to none.

3) Medical Insurance dictates everything. Right or wrong, hospitals are businesses. If they don't break even at the least, then the doors will have to close sooner than later. If this is the case, it is still not an excuse for poor care.

4) Because of the pressure from insurance companies, hospitals sometimes end up treating their patients like a car on an assembly line. Rush em in and rush em out.

5) There are good and bad employees in every field. Nurses of old seem to be more caring. Not saying that they're not still some very compassionate nurses today. Just not as many. I believe this is another prime example of how modern culture and media have "desensitized" people.

6) Those rehab programs, when ran correctly and with a willing patient, are a blessing. I've personally seen them work wonders in some patients.

7) I hope things improve for you and your mother.

 

[slick4591]

I know everyone has different experiences, but when my MIL was in a nursing facility her level of care got a lot better after we installed a nanny cam. Rehab places are known for hiring minimum wage floor employees and high turnover rates.

 

[Ky hills]

I know everyone has different experiences, but when my MIL was in a nursing facility her level of care got a lot better after we installed a nanny cam. Rehab places are known for hiring minimum wage floor employees and high turnover rates.

Interesting idea. You are correct about the low pay and turnover rates. Kind of a sad reality. We have visited a couple rehab places that have been recommended by other folks. There definitely some facilities in the area that have earned such a bad reputation there is no way we would consider placing her in them.

 

[sstterry]

You need to get her moved!

I agree, she is supposed to be released today to a rehab facility. They told us early on after admitting her that a case worker would come see us and discuss the rehab and other things. That was Friday night, and yesterday Monday at 4 pm she finally called and said she would be being released in 2 to 3 days and for us to decide on a rehab. They were going to place her over an hours drive away if we didn't choose. We told her we would get back with her this morning. As we wanted to look around and tour a couple places that had been recommended, she agreed. Fast forward to this morning she calls again saying she will be released today and we have to find somewhere to take her to immediately. Just disgusted all the way around with that hospital experience.

What the doctors want and what the hospital wants are often 2 different things.
I suspect, that what private ins or medicare will and won't pay for at the hospital is dictating the timeline.....tho it could be they have a shortage of beds I suppose...

What Greybeard says is correct Hospitals are driven by the Insurance Companies and not what the Dr's say or what is best for the patient. That is where the system is broken. Pencil pushers and algorithms control what Health Insurance will pay.

 

[TexasBred]

Guess I may be the exception to the rule but over the past 15 years I've had three hospitalizations along with chemo and radiation on an outpatient basis. I can say nothing but good things about the care I received ESPECIALLY from the R.N.'s and Nurse Practitioners. One surgery in Houston (Memorial Herman Hospital) I never saw the doctor except when he came in to introduce himself prior to surgery and was in the hands of extremely caring and highly qualified nurses. Mercy I can't say enough good about these people. I try to make their job easier though by being as low maintenance as possible and doing things myself as quickly as possible.

I will say that after the surgery in Houston (Stint placed in Aorta) i looked like I had been in a fight. Nurse explained to me just how difficult it often is to get the totally relaxed human body into the position it needs to be in to perform the procedure. I was sore all over, had bruises, a red strip across my face and blood in a few places. It was laughable after he explained that basically they were working with a dead body thus getting no help from the patient. Again, I can't complain about my treatment in any way. For what it's worth I also learned that depending on why you are in the hospital they will seldom ever tell you that you absolutely cannot have this or that to eat or drink unless you are on a very restricted diet. My wife would bring me a strong cup of coffee first thing evey morning and I would pass on the hospital mixture. Also brought up a few McDonalds Sausage McMuffin with Egg. :lol:

 

[TCRanch]

My husband went in for a pacemaker last Aug. Everything that could go wrong, did. Surgery was delayed 4 hours, he went into tremors because the pacemaker was touching a nerve on the left ventricle. Medtronics recalibrated the pacemaker & that fixed the problem but he was also in tremendous pain. It was a Friday night, his nurse refused to administer pain meds or text the cardiologist on call until 6 the next morning. By that time he was in a-Fib, nauseous, sweating, out of control pain. Cardiologist on call arrived and a whole slew of tests to rule out heart attack but turns out his lung sack had been punctured (pneumothorax) during the surgery. Pneumo went down enough he didn't have to have a tube but spent 2 extra days in the hospital. And that's the condensed version. He's on Medicare. I went in to the same hospital a few months ago for a heart cath (different cardiologist) and it was textbook, 5 star review perfect, went in through the artery in my wrist, zero blockage (I'm the 15% false positive on a nuclear stress test), staff was incredible, home by noon. I'm on the dreaded Obmacare but pay out the wazoo for my coverage.

NO, the situation with your mother is NOT right. And I believe - at least now - the medical care you receive depends on your primary care physician(s), how much money the "system" has already bilked out of you (or intend to receive), the flip of a coin, whether the stars & moon are aligned & the medical staff that draws the short straw & has to work "off" hours.

 

[greybeard]

Guess I may be the exception to the rule but over the past 15 years I've had three hospitalizations along with chemo and radiation on an outpatient basis. I can say nothing but good things about the care I received ESPECIALLY from the R.N.'s and Nurse Practitioners. One surgery in Houston (Memorial Herman Hospital) I never saw the doctor except when he came in to introduce himself prior to surgery and was in the hands of extremely caring and highly qualified nurses. Mercy I can't say enough good about these people.

Same with my care every time I've been admitted, but I saw a slew of doctors. Pretty sure if a doctor had any privileges at all at that facility, they came in to see me...if only for 2 minutes. I'm sure you know why...... cha ching, cha ching, cha ching...

But I can't complain at all. They all knew their stuff for sure..the doctors and the nursing staff.

 

[hurleyjd]

You need to get her moved!

I agree, she is supposed to be released today to a rehab facility. They told us early on after admitting her that a case worker would come see us and discuss the rehab and other things. That was Friday night, and yesterday Monday at 4 pm she finally called and said she would be being released in 2 to 3 days and for us to decide on a rehab. They were going to place her over an hours drive away if we didn't choose. We told her we would get back with her this morning. As we wanted to look around and tour a couple places that had been recommended, she agreed. Fast forward to this morning she calls again saying she will be released today and we have to find somewhere to take her to immediately. Just disgusted all the way around with that hospital experience.

Move her home and take care of her. Home health can be had if the doctor will work with you.

 

[A.J.]

As much as the hospital charges the service should be second to none. You need to write this all down and have a sit down with the hospital manager, after she is released.

X1

Make sure and speak to management, and voice your displeasure in the follow up surveys they give you. Most all facilities push hard to have patients sign up for patient portals so they can review and comment on their experience at the facility. This is part of the Meaningful Use requirements the government has in place for healthcare facilities that dictates how much they get reimbursed by the government, so bad reviews can hit them where it hurts - their pocketbook. Healthcare costs much more than it ever has, and in my opinion, the quality of healthcare is worse than ever. I'm sorry to hear you have had such a bad experience there. I hope she can find a good facility nearby that will treat her with the care and respect she deserves. I'm one of the most laid back people You will ever meet, but the quickest way to light my fuse is to say or do something hurtful to my family. I would definitely be feeling the same way you do if I was in your shoes.

 

[Ryder]

Been through that with my mother when she had a stroke.
Hard to argue with those people because they are so organized with their excuses.
If you can, go see her at varying times so they can't detect a pattern.
Keep records of everything so if you have to confront them on an issue you will have your facts in order. They will lie through their teeth.
Social workers are supposed to be your 'go to' people. That was a joke.
We checked every night and was told she was getting her medication. She was not.

Friend of mine had her mother in a facility for a long time. She checked on her mother often and they called her the witch from hades. She demanded and got good care for her mother.
It is unpleasant but sometimes you have to be demanding.

Hope the new facility is a good one. There are some good people out there also.
Wish the very best for you and your mother.