Rustler9
Well-known member
Someone sent me this, not to knock the state of Alabama, you can substitute any state but I thought it was kind of funny.....
A senior at Alabama was overheard saying... "When the end of the world
comes, I hope to be in Alabama." When asked why, he replied he'd rather be
in Alabama because everything happens in Alabama 20 years later than in the
rest of the civilized world.
========================================
An Alabama State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-85. The trooper asked,
"Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
========================================
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the
day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the
weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked. "Henry had
a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the
successful hunter replied. "You left Henry laying out there and carried the
deer back?" they inquired. "A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured
no one is going to steal Henry!"
========================================
The young man from Alabama came running into the store and said to his
buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"
Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man answered, "I couldn't
tell, but I got the license number."
========================================
NEWS FLASH! - Alabama's worst air disaster occurred when a small two-seater
Cessna 150 plane, piloted by two Auburn University students, crashed into a
cemetery earlier today. Search and Rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies
so far and expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening.
The pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery efforts.
========================================
A man in Alabama had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and
proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it.
Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he
drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the
fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The
passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you
break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back!
I never did understand it either." =====================================
The owner of a golf course in Alabama was confused about paying an invoice,
so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her
into his office and said, "You graduated from The University of Alabama and
I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would
you take off?" The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but
my earrings." You gotta love those Alabama women.
A senior at Alabama was overheard saying... "When the end of the world
comes, I hope to be in Alabama." When asked why, he replied he'd rather be
in Alabama because everything happens in Alabama 20 years later than in the
rest of the civilized world.
========================================
An Alabama State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-85. The trooper asked,
"Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
========================================
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the
day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the
weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked. "Henry had
a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the
successful hunter replied. "You left Henry laying out there and carried the
deer back?" they inquired. "A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured
no one is going to steal Henry!"
========================================
The young man from Alabama came running into the store and said to his
buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"
Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man answered, "I couldn't
tell, but I got the license number."
========================================
NEWS FLASH! - Alabama's worst air disaster occurred when a small two-seater
Cessna 150 plane, piloted by two Auburn University students, crashed into a
cemetery earlier today. Search and Rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies
so far and expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening.
The pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery efforts.
========================================
A man in Alabama had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and
proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it.
Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he
drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the
fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The
passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you
break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back!
I never did understand it either." =====================================
The owner of a golf course in Alabama was confused about paying an invoice,
so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her
into his office and said, "You graduated from The University of Alabama and
I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would
you take off?" The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but
my earrings." You gotta love those Alabama women.
