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Coffee Shop
Unavoidable Laws
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<blockquote data-quote="jack.diamond" data-source="post: 281827" data-attributes="member: 4708"><p>Unavoidable Laws</p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>..These are the unavoidable laws of the natural universe.</p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>1. Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>2. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>3. Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>4. Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>5. Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>6. Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time). </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>7. Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>8. Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>9. Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>10. Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>11. Theater Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>12. Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>13. Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>14. Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness, color and cost of the carpet/rug. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>15. Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>16. Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>17. Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>18. Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet. </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p>19. Wilson 's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it. (Mannatech is definitely a notable exception to this law)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jack.diamond, post: 281827, member: 4708"] Unavoidable Laws ..These are the unavoidable laws of the natural universe. 1. Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee. 2. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. 3. Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. 4. Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal. 5. Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire. 6. Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time). 7. Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings. 8. Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. 9. Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will. 10. Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. 11. Theater Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last. 12. Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. 13. Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers. 14. Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness, color and cost of the carpet/rug. 15. Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are. 16. Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about. 17. Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly. 18. Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet. 19. Wilson 's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it. (Mannatech is definitely a notable exception to this law) [/QUOTE]
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