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<blockquote data-quote="Sir Loin" data-source="post: 953253" data-attributes="member: 5601"><p>Mick, from Dublin , appeared on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' and towards the end of the program had already won 500,000 Euros. </p><p></p><p>"You've done very well so far," said Chris Tarrant, the show's presenter, "but for a million euros you've only got one life-line left, phone a friend. </p><p>Everything is riding on this question. Will you go for it?"</p><p></p><p>"Sure," said Mick. "I'll have a go!" </p><p></p><p>"Which of the following birds does NOT build its own nest? </p><p></p><p>a) Sparrow</p><p>b) Thrush,</p><p>c) Magpie,</p><p>d) Cuckoo?"</p><p></p><p>"I haven't got a clue." said Mick,</p><p>''So I'll use my last lifeline and phone my friend Paddy back home in Dublin .."</p><p></p><p>Mick called up his mate, and told him the circumstances and repeated the question to him.</p><p></p><p></p><p>"Fookin hell, Mick!" cried Paddy. </p><p>"Dat's simple it's a cuckoo."</p><p>"Are you sure?" </p><p></p><p>"I'm fookin sure." </p><p></p><p>Mick hung up the phone and told Chris, "I'll go with cuckoo as my answer." </p><p></p><p>"Is that your final answer?" asked Chris. </p><p></p><p>"Dat it is." </p><p></p><p>There was a long, long pause and then the presenter screamed, "Cuckoo is the correct answer! Mick, you've won 1 million euros!" </p><p></p><p>The next night, Mick invited Paddy to their local pub to buy him a drink. </p><p></p><p>"Tell me, Paddy? How in Heaven's name did you know it was DA Cuckoo that doesn't build its own nest?" </p><p></p><p></p><p>"Because he lives in a Fookin clock!"</p><p>**************************</p><p></p><p>Bill Clinton is getting $12 million for his memoirs. </p><p></p><p>Hillary got $8 million for hers. </p><p></p><p>That's $20 million for memories from two people, who for eight years, repeatedly testified, under oath, that they couldn't remember anything. </p><p>Is this a great country or what?</p><p>************************</p><p></p><p>The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500 man elite fighting unit called the US REDNECK SPECIAL FORCES (USRSF). These North Carolina, Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Missouri, Louisiana, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas and Tennessee boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given the following facts about Terrorists:</p><p></p><p>1. The season opened today.</p><p>2. There is no limit.</p><p>3. They taste just like chicken.</p><p>4. They don't like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus.</p><p>5. They are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the death of Dale Earnhardt.</p><p></p><p>This mess in Iraq should be over IN A WEEK. </p><p>****************************</p><p></p><p>NEWS FLASH - GOD ANNOUNCES THE 11TH COMMANDMENT!</p><p>>> </p><p>During a recent staff meeting in Heaven, God, Moses, and</p><p>Saint Peter concluded that the behavior of Ex-President</p><p>Clinton has brought about the need for an eleventh</p><p>commandment.</p><p></p><p>They worked long and hard in a brain-storming session to</p><p>try to settle on the wording of the new commandment,</p><p>because they realized that it should have the same style,</p><p>majesty and dignity as the original ten. They began their</p><p>brain-storming and came up with the 11th.</p><p></p><p>After many revisions, they finally agreed that the eleventh</p><p>commandment should be:</p><p></p><p>"Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sir Loin, post: 953253, member: 5601"] Mick, from Dublin , appeared on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' and towards the end of the program had already won 500,000 Euros. "You've done very well so far," said Chris Tarrant, the show's presenter, "but for a million euros you've only got one life-line left, phone a friend. Everything is riding on this question. Will you go for it?" "Sure," said Mick. "I'll have a go!" "Which of the following birds does NOT build its own nest? a) Sparrow b) Thrush, c) Magpie, d) Cuckoo?" "I haven't got a clue." said Mick, ''So I'll use my last lifeline and phone my friend Paddy back home in Dublin .." Mick called up his mate, and told him the circumstances and repeated the question to him. "Fookin hell, Mick!" cried Paddy. "Dat's simple it's a cuckoo." "Are you sure?" "I'm fookin sure." Mick hung up the phone and told Chris, "I'll go with cuckoo as my answer." "Is that your final answer?" asked Chris. "Dat it is." There was a long, long pause and then the presenter screamed, "Cuckoo is the correct answer! Mick, you've won 1 million euros!" The next night, Mick invited Paddy to their local pub to buy him a drink. "Tell me, Paddy? How in Heaven's name did you know it was DA Cuckoo that doesn't build its own nest?" "Because he lives in a Fookin clock!" ************************** Bill Clinton is getting $12 million for his memoirs. Hillary got $8 million for hers. That's $20 million for memories from two people, who for eight years, repeatedly testified, under oath, that they couldn't remember anything. Is this a great country or what? ************************ The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500 man elite fighting unit called the US REDNECK SPECIAL FORCES (USRSF). These North Carolina, Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Missouri, Louisiana, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas and Tennessee boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given the following facts about Terrorists: 1. The season opened today. 2. There is no limit. 3. They taste just like chicken. 4. They don't like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus. 5. They are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the death of Dale Earnhardt. This mess in Iraq should be over IN A WEEK. **************************** NEWS FLASH - GOD ANNOUNCES THE 11TH COMMANDMENT! >> During a recent staff meeting in Heaven, God, Moses, and Saint Peter concluded that the behavior of Ex-President Clinton has brought about the need for an eleventh commandment. They worked long and hard in a brain-storming session to try to settle on the wording of the new commandment, because they realized that it should have the same style, majesty and dignity as the original ten. They began their brain-storming and came up with the 11th. After many revisions, they finally agreed that the eleventh commandment should be: "Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff." [/QUOTE]
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