I know how you feel. That my problem also. I don't like sending even the calves out. Had forty two head of goats and I sold them off and still don't like it but I felt it was time to move on it and sell out. When people ask "why did you get rid of all your goats"? I just answer , "Didn't need any more tax write offs". It's still sad to go to pasture where they were though. They all had name and would see me coming in the pasture and they would come running and hollowing and crowd around me as I wa if walking to the feed sheds. I really miss them but it had gotten to where it was too much for me to do with the feeding, doctoring, hoof trimming and fence / hotwires they would tear up. Still miss them though.