Funerals

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cowboy43

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Do you go to funerals, I have a friend and wife who go to all funerals even if they do not know them well, they seem to view it as a social event to visit and meet people and gather information. I view them as a very solemn and sad event.
 
I go if it's family, someone I really thought highly of, or if I'm asked to be a pallbearer. I skip the rest. I don't enjoy being sad or being around sad people unless it's a necessity.
 
Trying to wrap my head around "social event" and "meet & greet". I agree with JMJ and have no intention of going to a funeral unless it's someone close to me. I'm more likely to go to the viewing, where I can personally express my condolences & pay my respects.
 
I know people that do the same. I use to think it was weird but I've started to kind of change my view after going to a couple where there was hardly any one there. It's sad to think about some of these people who dont have many friends on family being buried with no one around. There are groups here in town that try to attend funerals like that and I think that a great thing. I wouldn't say they think it's a social event.
 
I only attend actual funerals if it's family or someone very close. Living in a small town where everybody knows everybody, I do pass through the visitation part quite often to pay respects, but I don't actually attend the funeral.
 
The wife and her sisters go to way too many in my opinion. If the parent of someone they went to school with passes they go. Never really knew the dead person and haven't seen the class mate in decades. But they go. I avoid them except close relatives or friends. Those years falling timber I went to too many for co-workers or former co-workers who died way too young. I have had my fill.
 
Brute 23 said:
I know people that do the same. I use to think it was weird but I've started to kind of change my view after going to a couple where there was hardly any one there. It's sad to think about some of these people who dont have many friends on family being buried with no one around. There are groups here in town that try to attend funerals like that and I think that a great thing. I wouldn't say they think it's a social event.
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Went to one this past Monday. My neighbor. He was 83. Graveside service only. He had no family present. Only 18 people there and one of those was the preacher and two were funeral home employees. Smallest attendance I've ever seen in our tight knit community. Ever.
 
JMJ Farms said:
Brute 23 said:
I know people that do the same. I use to think it was weird but I've started to kind of change my view after going to a couple where there was hardly any one there. It's sad to think about some of these people who dont have many friends on family being buried with no one around. There are groups here in town that try to attend funerals like that and I think that a great thing. I wouldn't say they think it's a social event.
Click to expand...

Went to one this past Monday. My neighbor. He was 83. Graveside service only. He had no family present. Only 18 people there and one of those was the preacher and two were funeral home employees. Smallest attendance I've ever seen in our tight knit community. Ever.
Click to expand...

Speaking of attendance, it seems like that's becoming a trophy where I'm from. When some people pass, the visitation line is out the door. I've stood in line for over an hour before. It's hard to believe that many people really had a connection. Afterwards, everyone talks about the huge crowd. I don't recall that so much when I was growing up.
 
I'm more likely to go to a visitation. Funerals for family and close friends.
Visitation to express condolences to survivors of someone I may or may not of known.
 
JMJ Farms said:
I go if it's family, someone I really thought highly of, or if I'm asked to be a pallbearer. I skip the rest. I don't enjoy being sad or being around sad people unless it's a necessity.
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Pretty much exactly the same feelings. A few people here go to alot more than they should. I think it is really weird.
 
I never go up to the casket. I think its weird to see people dead like that. I want the good memories in my brain, not that one.

... and I definitely dont understand taking pictures of the casket with the person in it. That also seems odd.

The only very large funerals I have been to were for a superintendent that had started out as a coach and moved up. He got cancel while still working and passed shortly after. They literally had a huge memorial in the stadium. There were people like a football game. He interacted with a lot of people over the years and was involved in a lot of things right before passing. He was one of those people if you talked to him for 5 min you felt like yall were now life long friends.

SBMF 2015 said:
I'm more likely to go to a visitation. Funerals for family and close friends.
Visitation to express condolences to survivors of someone I may or may not of known.
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Same here.
 
When I was about 21 my Mother's step dad died. Grandmother wanted the grandson's to be pallbearers. It was open casket. Poor old Archie had been gassed in WWI and he was a life time smoker. Died of lung issues and he looked pretty tough in the casket. Then the pastor decided that with a captive audience that this would be a good time to preach he77 fire and brimstone for about 30 minutes. Cured me of looking at dead people and going to that particular church. Funerals are never a pleasant occasion but that one really stands out as bad.
 
I will go to a showing only if I know the deceased. Funeral only if it's family but had a college football buddy KIA in Afghanistan and went to both and I hope I never have to go to something like that ever again.
 
herofan said:
JMJ Farms said:
Brute 23 said:
I know people that do the same. I use to think it was weird but I've started to kind of change my view after going to a couple where there was hardly any one there. It's sad to think about some of these people who dont have many friends on family being buried with no one around. There are groups here in town that try to attend funerals like that and I think that a great thing. I wouldn't say they think it's a social event.
Click to expand...

Went to one this past Monday. My neighbor. He was 83. Graveside service only. He had no family present. Only 18 people there and one of those was the preacher and two were funeral home employees. Smallest attendance I've ever seen in our tight knit community. Ever.
Click to expand...

Speaking of attendance, it seems like that's becoming a trophy where I'm from. When some people pass, the visitation line is out the door. I've stood in line for over an hour before. It's hard to believe that many people really had a connection. Afterwards, everyone talks about the huge crowd. I don't recall that so much when I was growing up.
Click to expand...

I've seen visitation lines here that were 3+ hours long. And I'm not exaggerating in the slightest. Especially when death was a young person or because of a sudden unanticipated accident. I live in a rural area with population somewhere around 22k. A lot of big families with tons of connections to many people either directly or through kids, grandkids, marriage, etc. There are very few people who die here that I don't know, either them personally, or someone in their family.

One other reason you have larger visitations here is because of how effectively news travels these days. What irks me is when the politicians start showing up to visitations on an election year. After they get beat or are no longer in office they get as scarce as hens teeth.
 
It's like when Lewis died Democrat's pack a building to honor him, when Cain died it was his fault for being in a packed building. Just depends on your party affiliations.
 
Went to one a few weeks ago.
They think it is a good time to get sinners saved. I got nothing against getting sinners saved, but I think a funeral should be to remember and honor the dead.

I remember in times past, people gathering around the casket, saying "Don't he look naturel." They all just looked dead to me.
 
Ryder said:
Went to one a few weeks ago.
They think it is a good time to get sinners saved. I got nothing against getting sinners saved, but I think a funeral should be to remember and honor the dead.

I remember in times past, people gathering around the casket, saying "Don't he look naturel." They all just looked dead to me.
Click to expand...

Some are trying to preach them into heaven and that ship has already sailed.
 

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