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Texas Cracking Down on Speeding

TexasBred

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The Texas Department fo Public Safety is cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas. For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.

Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A. The Dallas Cowboys

Q. What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ"..

Q. How do you keep a Dallas Cowboy out of your yard?
A. Put up a goal post.

Q. What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?
A. A thief.

Q. What's the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

Q. How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A. Nobody remembers and we will never find out!

Q. What do the Cowboys and a possums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
 

mnmtranching

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:lol: :lol: Sounds like some Cowboy Fan discontentment down there.

Tell you what :nod: We will send you our QB and Head Coach for 2 of your cheerleaders. :welcome:
 

backhoeboogie

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grannysoo":26wpdq9z said:
Michael Vick will be available soon........ :dunce:

We'd be glad to ship him out of the state.

Michael Vick in a Cowboy uniform has been the talk around here for several weeks now. Jerry Jones should be able to hire more outlaws soon.

Remember, the first thing Jones did was fire Landry. He didn't offer him a job as a scout or something and let him resign. He fired Landry. I'll never get over that.

True story. I watched the game when Landry was inducted into the ring of honor at half time. I was sitting there thinking about how nice it would be to have seen this with Daddy or my Grandaddy (they thought Landry walked on water). The next thing I know I have tears dripping off of my cheeks. Both of my daughters were in total shock. They had never seen me cry. I was blubbering like a baby and had to go outside.
 

Alice

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backhoeboogie":3kcpsnk8 said:
grannysoo":3kcpsnk8 said:
Michael Vick will be available soon........ :dunce:

We'd be glad to ship him out of the state.

Michael Vick in a Cowboy uniform has been the talk around here for several weeks now. Jerry Jones should be able to hire more outlaws soon.

Oh no! Say it ain't so, BHB!!!!! Anymore thugs and Jones will have to set up a halfway house to house them!

Alice
 

backhoeboogie

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Alice":210th5hm said:
backhoeboogie":210th5hm said:
grannysoo":210th5hm said:
Michael Vick will be available soon........ :dunce:

We'd be glad to ship him out of the state.

Michael Vick in a Cowboy uniform has been the talk around here for several weeks now. Jerry Jones should be able to hire more outlaws soon.

Oh no! Say it ain't so, BHB!!!!! Anymore thugs and Jones will have to set up a halfway house to house them!

Alice

Just hire some correctional officers for that new stadium and he's all set. The Huntsville Rodeo has been a bit hit for years. Maybe they can offer some advice.
 

skyline

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backhoeboogie":yk4qbnun said:
grannysoo":yk4qbnun said:
Michael Vick will be available soon........ :dunce:

We'd be glad to ship him out of the state.

Michael Vick in a Cowboy uniform has been the talk around here for several weeks now. Jerry Jones should be able to hire more outlaws soon.

Remember, the first thing Jones did was fire Landry. He didn't offer him a job as a scout or something and let him resign. He fired Landry. I'll never get over that.

True story. I watched the game when Landry was inducted into the ring of honor at half time. I was sitting there thinking about how nice it would be to have seen this with Daddy or my Grandaddy (they thought Landry walked on water). The next thing I know I have tears dripping off of my cheeks. Both of my daughters were in total shock. They had never seen me cry. I was blubbering like a baby and had to go outside.

I agree. That was low class. Landry deserved much better. He was a hero.
 

skyline

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mnmtranching":3pps2exw said:
:lol: :lol: Sounds like some Cowboy Fan discontentment down there.

Tell you what :nod: We will send you our QB and Head Coach for 2 of your cheerleaders. :welcome:

The cheerleaders are the best thing they've got going for them right now. Not a fair deal....
 

LoveMoo11

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I'm not really a football fan but I do follow sports so this made me laugh :lol: I'll have to show this to my roommate-he is a diehard Cowboys fan.
 

HOSS

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Alice":29n0gxle said:
backhoeboogie":29n0gxle said:
grannysoo":29n0gxle said:
Michael Vick will be available soon........ :dunce:

We'd be glad to ship him out of the state.

Michael Vick in a Cowboy uniform has been the talk around here for several weeks now. Jerry Jones should be able to hire more outlaws soon.

Oh no! Say it ain't so, BHB!!!!! Anymore thugs and Jones will have to set up a halfway house to house them!

Alice

We sure were happy to ship PacMan Jones down there to Jerry. He was welcome to him and good riddance for us :banana:
 

grannysoo

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HOSS":1r0hsqri said:
We sure were happy to ship PacMan Jones down there to Jerry. He was welcome to him and good riddance for us :banana:

Just as we'd be happy to ship Vick there too. Now, if we could only find a few rappers to throw in the mix and send with him....
 

Alice

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Texas Judge gives 7 year old right to decide custody.

Dallas , TX , December 31, 2008

A seven year old boy was at the center of a county courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy had a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.

The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.

After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Dallas Cowboys, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.
 

jw

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True story. I watched the game when Landry was inducted into the ring of honor at half time. I was sitting there thinking about how nice it would be to have seen this with Daddy or my Grandaddy (they thought Landry walked on water).

It would have been nice of Jerry to have inducted him in before he died, but then Jerry isn't very nice.


HOSS wrote:

We sure were happy to ship PacMan Jones down there to Jerry. He was welcome to him and good riddance for us

I think I heard PacMan got the boot yesterday. I may be wrong, so don't quote me.
 

backhoeboogie

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jw":1xlklszr said:
I think I heard PacMan got the boot yesterday. I may be wrong, so don't quote me.

I heard the same thing. Maybe he is out of state by now.

Maybe T.O. next?
 

larryshoat

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TexasBred":3p33aopp said:
The Texas Department fo Public Safety is cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas. For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.

Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A. The Dallas Cowboys

Q. What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ"..

Q. How do you keep a Dallas Cowboy out of your yard?
A. Put up a goal post.

Q. What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?
A. A thief.

Q. What's the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

Q. How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A. Nobody remembers and we will never find out!

Q. What do the Cowboys and a possums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!

Hey, you could take out the name Dallas Cowboys and put in Cincinnati Bengals and you would never know the difference . They spend more time in jail than playing football .

Larry
 

Alice

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larryshoat":3n8exx6x said:
TexasBred":3n8exx6x said:
The Texas Department fo Public Safety is cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas. For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.

Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A. The Dallas Cowboys

Q. What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ"..

Q. How do you keep a Dallas Cowboy out of your yard?
A. Put up a goal post.

Q. What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?
A. A thief.

Q. What's the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

Q. How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A. Nobody remembers and we will never find out!

Q. What do the Cowboys and a possums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!

Hey, you could take out the name Dallas Cowboys and put in Cincinnati Bengals and you would never know the difference . They spend more time in jail than playing football .

Larry

:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

And then again, that's sad...

Alice
 

TexasBred

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Heard something on the news this morning about another "Cowboy" getting into trouble over the weekend. What else is new??? :cry2: :cry2:
 
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