Tod Dague
Well-known member
This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries by the
Michigan Department of Environmental Quality, State of Michigan.
This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before
you get to the response letter.
State's letter)
SUBJECT: DEQ File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20;
Montcalm County
Dear Mr. DeVries:
It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental
Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above
referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner
and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity:
Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the
outlet stream of Spring Pond. A permit must be issued prior to the start of
this type of activity. A review of the Department's files show that no
permits have been issued. Therefore, the Department has determined that this
activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of
the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the
Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Michigan
Compiled Laws, annotated.
The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams
partially failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at
downstream locations. We find that dams of this nature are
inherently hazardous and cannot be permitted. The Department therefore orders
you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore the
stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush
forming the dams from the stream channel.
All restoration work shall be completed no later than January 31,
2003. Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so
that a follow-up site inspec tion may be scheduled by our staff. Failure
to comply with this request or any further unauthorized activity on the
site may result in this case being referred for elevated enforcement
action. We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this
matter.
Please feel free to contact me at this office if you have any
questions.
Sincerely,
David L. Price District Representative
Land and Water Management Division
This is the actual response sent back:
Re: DEQ File No. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Montcalm County.
Dear Mr. Price,
Your certified letter dated 12/17/02 has been handed to me to
respond to. I am the legal landowner but not the Contractor at 2088 Dagget,
Pierson, Michigan..
A couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized)process of
constructing and maintaining two wood "debris" dams across the
outlet stream of my Spring Pond. While I did not pay for, authorize, nor
supervise their dam project, I think they would be highly offended
that you call their skillful use of natures building materials "debris."
I would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their
dam project any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely
state there is no way you could ever match their dam skills, their
dam resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity, their dam persistence, their
dam determination and/or their dam work ethic. As to your request, I do
not think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam
permit prior to the start of this type of dam activity.
My first dam question to you is:
1) Are you trying to discriminate against my Spring PondBeavers....
or(2) do you require all beavers throughout this State to conform to
said dam request?
If you are not discriminating against these particular beavers,
through The Freedom of Information Act, I request completed copies of all
those other applicable beaver dam permits that have been issued. Perhaps
we will see if there really is a dam violation of Part 301, Inland
Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act,
Act451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of
the Michigan Compiled Laws, annotated.
I have several concerns. My first concern is...aren't the beavers
entitled to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are
financially destitute and are unable to pay for said representation, so the
State will have to provide them with a dam lawyer. The Department's dam
concern that either one or both of the dams failed during a recent rain
event causing flooding is proof that this is a natural occurrence, which
the Department is required to protect. In other words, we should leave
the Spring Pond Beavers alone rather than harassing them and calling
them dam names.
If you want the stream "restored" to a dam free-flow condition
please contact the beavers, but if you are going to arrest them, they
obviously did not pay any attention to your dam letter... they being unable to
read English. In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right
to build their unauthorized dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass
is green and water flows downstream. They have more dam rights than I
do to live and enjoy Spring Pond.
If the Department of Natural Resources and Environmental Protection
lives up to its name, it should protect the natural resources(Beavers) and
the environment (Beavers' Dams). So, as far as the beavers and I are
concerned, this dam case can be referred for more elevated
enforcement action right now. Why wait until 1/31/2003? The Spring Pond Beavers
may be under the dam ice then and there will be no way for you or your
dam staff to harass them then.
In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention a real
environmental quality (health) problem in the area. It is the bears!
Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I definitely believe you
should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the beavers
alone. If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch your step!
(The bears are not careful where they dump!)
Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to
contact you on your dam answering machine, I am sending this response to
your dam office.
Thank You,
Ryan DeVries & The Dam Beavers
God does not do for you what you have the power to do for yourself.
Michigan Department of Environmental Quality, State of Michigan.
This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before
you get to the response letter.
State's letter)
SUBJECT: DEQ File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20;
Montcalm County
Dear Mr. DeVries:
It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental
Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above
referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner
and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity:
Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the
outlet stream of Spring Pond. A permit must be issued prior to the start of
this type of activity. A review of the Department's files show that no
permits have been issued. Therefore, the Department has determined that this
activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of
the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the
Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Michigan
Compiled Laws, annotated.
The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams
partially failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at
downstream locations. We find that dams of this nature are
inherently hazardous and cannot be permitted. The Department therefore orders
you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore the
stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush
forming the dams from the stream channel.
All restoration work shall be completed no later than January 31,
2003. Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so
that a follow-up site inspec tion may be scheduled by our staff. Failure
to comply with this request or any further unauthorized activity on the
site may result in this case being referred for elevated enforcement
action. We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this
matter.
Please feel free to contact me at this office if you have any
questions.
Sincerely,
David L. Price District Representative
Land and Water Management Division
This is the actual response sent back:
Re: DEQ File No. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Montcalm County.
Dear Mr. Price,
Your certified letter dated 12/17/02 has been handed to me to
respond to. I am the legal landowner but not the Contractor at 2088 Dagget,
Pierson, Michigan..
A couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized)process of
constructing and maintaining two wood "debris" dams across the
outlet stream of my Spring Pond. While I did not pay for, authorize, nor
supervise their dam project, I think they would be highly offended
that you call their skillful use of natures building materials "debris."
I would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their
dam project any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely
state there is no way you could ever match their dam skills, their
dam resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity, their dam persistence, their
dam determination and/or their dam work ethic. As to your request, I do
not think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam
permit prior to the start of this type of dam activity.
My first dam question to you is:
1) Are you trying to discriminate against my Spring PondBeavers....
or(2) do you require all beavers throughout this State to conform to
said dam request?
If you are not discriminating against these particular beavers,
through The Freedom of Information Act, I request completed copies of all
those other applicable beaver dam permits that have been issued. Perhaps
we will see if there really is a dam violation of Part 301, Inland
Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act,
Act451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of
the Michigan Compiled Laws, annotated.
I have several concerns. My first concern is...aren't the beavers
entitled to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are
financially destitute and are unable to pay for said representation, so the
State will have to provide them with a dam lawyer. The Department's dam
concern that either one or both of the dams failed during a recent rain
event causing flooding is proof that this is a natural occurrence, which
the Department is required to protect. In other words, we should leave
the Spring Pond Beavers alone rather than harassing them and calling
them dam names.
If you want the stream "restored" to a dam free-flow condition
please contact the beavers, but if you are going to arrest them, they
obviously did not pay any attention to your dam letter... they being unable to
read English. In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right
to build their unauthorized dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass
is green and water flows downstream. They have more dam rights than I
do to live and enjoy Spring Pond.
If the Department of Natural Resources and Environmental Protection
lives up to its name, it should protect the natural resources(Beavers) and
the environment (Beavers' Dams). So, as far as the beavers and I are
concerned, this dam case can be referred for more elevated
enforcement action right now. Why wait until 1/31/2003? The Spring Pond Beavers
may be under the dam ice then and there will be no way for you or your
dam staff to harass them then.
In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention a real
environmental quality (health) problem in the area. It is the bears!
Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I definitely believe you
should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the beavers
alone. If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch your step!
(The bears are not careful where they dump!)
Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to
contact you on your dam answering machine, I am sending this response to
your dam office.
Thank You,
Ryan DeVries & The Dam Beavers
God does not do for you what you have the power to do for yourself.
That is great.
