Southern Thinking

[onecowfarms]

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Southern Thinking

Georgia :
The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

The secretary thought a moment.

"everything but my earrings."

Alabama:
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck.

"Where's Henry?" the others asked..

"Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied."

"You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired.

"A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry."

Louisiana:
A senior at LSU was overheard saying...
"When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana."

When asked why, he replied "I'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana twenty years later than in the rest of the civilized world."

Mississippi:
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"

Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?"
The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."

Tennessee:
A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65.
The trooper asked, "Got any ID?"
The driver replied, "Bout whut?"

North Carolina:
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.

A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was.

The man replied, "I have a flat tire."
The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"
The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I never did understand it neither

You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving North. :banana:

 

[Jogeephus]

I like them flares. :lol2:

 

[*Cowgirl*]

:nod: :tiphat:

 

[Calman]

We always try to keep things rather simple.

Cal

 

[Horticattleman]

:nod: :nod: :nod:

 

[Caustic Burno]

We always try to keep things rather simple.

Cal

That slow southern accent and long drawl is when the Yankee's deduct 20 IQ points and leave the fox guarding the hen house.

 

[backhoeboogie]

We always try to keep things rather simple.

Cal

That slow southern accent and long drawl is when the Yankee's deduct 20 IQ points and leave the fox guarding the hen house.

Plus there are the stupid things we do down here. Things like waiting our turn through 4 way stops. Pulling the truck off the road and taking your hat off when you meet a funeral precession. We are way behind the times.

 

[alabama]

"You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving North."

That bout sumed it up.

 

[Ryder]

We always try to keep things rather simple.

Cal

That slow southern accent and long drawl is when the Yankee's deduct 20 IQ points and leave the fox guarding the hen house.

Plus there are the stupid things we do down here. Things like waiting our turn through 4 way stops. Pulling the truck off the road and taking your hat off when you meet a funeral precession. We are way behind the times.

And saying dumb things like Yes sir, Yes maam, Please, Thank you.

 

[TexasBred]

And giving a feller a dollar for a beer just cause he was honest when he asked for the dollar and told you that was what he intended to buy.

 

[CUZ]

That's why in the South the nativity scenes have the Wise men dressed as firemen. - The Bible says they came from a far.

And is Ya'll singular or plural?


Answer: Ya'll is singular, the plural is All Ya'll.

 

[redfornow]

We always try to keep things rather simple.

Cal

That slow southern accent and long drawl is when the Yankee's deduct 20 IQ points and leave the fox guarding the hen house.

Plus there are the stupid things we do down here. Things like waiting our turn through 4 way stops. Pulling the truck off the road and taking your hat off when you meet a funeral precession. We are way behind the times.

Yep, having class has gone out of style...

 

[Swiss Cowboy]

Before I moved to Canada I used to live in Chicago for some years and then in Tennessee. I preferred the south over the north for all the reasons mentioned here. It's friendlier and nicer folks. It's for the same reason that I like Canada too.

Loved the one about the Alabama deer hunter. (lol)

Have a nice day Ya'll :cboy:

 

[john250]

Before I moved to Canada I used to live in Chicago for some years and then in Tennessee. I preferred the south over the north for all the reasons mentioned here. It's friendlier and nicer folks. It's for the same reason that I like Canada too.

Loved the one about the Alabama deer hunter. (lol)

Have a nice day Ya'll :cboy:

I have been to Chicago, and I've been to Tennessee. Your judgement is sound, but don't post it. The folks from Tennessee are way too full of themselves already. Nearly as bad as the Texans.

 

[MistyMorning]

Before I moved to Canada I used to live in Chicago for some years and then in Tennessee. I preferred the south over the north for all the reasons mentioned here. It's friendlier and nicer folks. It's for the same reason that I like Canada too.

Loved the one about the Alabama deer hunter. (lol)

Have a nice day Ya'll :cboy:

I have been to Chicago, and I've been to Tennessee. Your judgement is sound, but don't post it. The folks from Tennessee are way too full of themselves already. Nearly as bad as the Texans.

Thanks John...Looks like you got a two fer there! I'm laughing almost as hard as I did at the Ibosa thread. :shock:

 

[chrisy]

Louisiana only 20 year behind????? good post. :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

 

[Maineshowgirl]

:lol: :lol: :lol: But what bout us in Tx :roll: jk haha

 

[larryshoat]

We always try to keep things rather simple.

Cal

That slow southern accent and long drawl is when the Yankee's deduct 20 IQ points and leave the fox guarding the hen house.

Plus there are the stupid things we do down here. Things like waiting our turn through 4 way stops. Pulling the truck off the road and taking your hat off when you meet a funeral precession. We are way behind the times.

Hey, thanks for pointing all that out. I was going to think of some good stuff we do up north but, didn't come up with much. my mom is from Georgia. Do you know how hurtful it is to be called a ( damn Yankee ) by your own mother. :lol: