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Tommy Ruyle

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Congress today announced that the office of President of the United States of America will be outsourced to India as of September 1, 2009.

The move is being made in order to save the President's $400,000+ yearly salary, and also a record $750 billion in deficit expenditures and related overhead that his office has incurred during the last 3 months.

It is anticipated that $7 trillion can be saved to the end of the President's term. "We believe this is a wise financial move. The cost savings are huge," stated Congressman Thomas Reynolds (R-WA). "We cannot remain competitive on the world stage with the current level of cash outlay," Reynolds noted.

Obama was informed by email this morning of his termination. Preparations for the job move have been underway for some time.

Gurvinder Singh, a tele-technician for Indus Teleservices, Mumbai India, will assume the office of
President as of September 1, 2009. Mr. Singh was born in the United States while his Indian parents were vacationing at Niagara Falls, NY, thus making him eligible for the position. He will receive a salary of $320 (USD) a month, but no health coverage or other benefits.

It is believed that Mr. Singh will be able to handle his job responsibilities without a support staff. Due to the time difference between the US and India, he will be working primarily at night. "Working nights will allow me to keep my day job at the Dell Computer call center," stated Mr. Singh in an exclusive interview.

"I am excited about this position. I always hoped I would be President." A Congressional spokesperson noted that while Mr. Singh may not be fully aware of all the issues involved in the office of President, this should not be a problem as Obama had never been familiar with the issues either.

Mr. Singh will rely upon a script tree that will enable him to respond effectively to most topics of concern. Using these canned responses, he can address common concerns without having to understand the underlying issue at all. "We know these scripting tools work," stated the spokesperson. :lol2:
 

larryshoat

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When you call Gurvinder will have to say his name is Bob or some other American name.

Larry
 

Lammie

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I heard somewhere, like NPR, that those folks take classes to sound more American. And they must use different names. I can't feature that they are all named Allison. I get this all the time when I call, especially credit card companies. I had to cancel a subscription to AOL that my son doesn't use and it was such a hassle. I was telling them, "No, I don't have the password. No, I don't know what number he was using, he was at college. It's my dam account and I want to cancel this service!!!"
 

Jalopy

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Well I am not impressed TR. We do not need more out sourcing of jobs to India. We should instead hire some unemployed person from the US. That way we would keep the monthly stipend here and we would have some one available for the talking head shots that the news media needs so bad. I am sure there is someone available to work here in the US that would appreciate the $320 per month you are offering. This would create an even statistic for our unemployment rolls where as if we outsource it would add one to the unemployment rolls. :lol: :lol:
 

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