Sawgum
Well-known member
Men are happier people because:
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this ones too icky. You never have to think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental- $100. People never stare at your chest when your talking to them. The occasional well rendered belch is practically expected. One mood at a time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tractors. A week long vacation requires only one suitcase. You open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of boots-- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes. No wonder men are happier.
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this ones too icky. You never have to think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental- $100. People never stare at your chest when your talking to them. The occasional well rendered belch is practically expected. One mood at a time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tractors. A week long vacation requires only one suitcase. You open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of boots-- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes. No wonder men are happier.
