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McDonald’s application

mobgrazer

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These are actual answers on a McDonald’s application submitted by a 17 year old kid someplace in Florida. They actually hired him too. I think this kid’s gonna go far…

NAME: Greg Bulmash.

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I’m worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.
 

Victoria

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I had a guy that gave me a resume like that. It was so creative and funny I had to pull him in for an interview. He had no sales experience but I hired him and didn't regret it. He could sell.
 

brandonm_13

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That is the perfect example of why fast food restaurants can never seem to get an order right. :nod:
 

alacattleman

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and be sure too give them the "exact amount" of money for your order..... cause if you give a ten and change you done for
 

brandonm_13

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Now, you tell them what you want, and they push the button with a picture on it. You hand them money and they punch that in too, and change automatically shoots out the side. They don't have to learn how to count, how to listen, or how to learn. Instead of them learning to do a good job, we dumb down the job so they don't have to learn anything. That'll help them later on in life.
 

Dave

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My first day of college, 39 years ago, I had to fill out a bunch of forms. By about the tenth one I was getting bored, so to the question sex, I answered yes. I thought maybe they would hook me up but they never did???
 

LoveMoo11

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Kid's too smart to work at McDonald's if he answered that way to be funny...if not, he might have some trouble :lol:
 

mobgrazer

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I worked a management job for 6 months. It was my job to fill positions and train people. I had had it one day with trying to train people that had the best applications.

I pulled one that was not the smartest one in the book.
In case of an emergency what number to call? 911.
How do I tell at this number? Who ever you need to so I get help.

I will tell you he was not the smartest body there but once he was trained he was one of the best people to work with. No need to tell him every 5 min what your job is and what you should be working on. He was more on the side of tell me what to do and stand back do your job and watch me work.

I saw him 10 years after I trained him and he had made it part way up the food chain and made something out of him self.
 

IGotMyWings

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brandonm_13":1hz5wgtt said:
Now, you tell them what you want, and they push the button with a picture on it. You hand them money and they punch that in too, and change automatically shoots out the side. They don't have to learn how to count, how to listen, or how to learn. Instead of them learning to do a good job, we dumb down the job so they don't have to learn anything. That'll help them later on in life.

Reminds me of a couple of things...one was a lady asking a McDonald's employee for a half dozen of thier cookies. The cashier said that they didn't have half dozens, only six or twelve packages. Another is being behind a car in the drive through line at Burger King. It was summer, windows rolled down in the truck, and I could hear the lady in the car ahead of me placing her order...she ordered a Big Mac. I think that the lack of edumacation and attention to detail resides on both sides of the counter.

Although I applaud the kid's sense of humor, I think it speaks volumes of the actual work ethic of the younger generation. I know that my parents thought my generation would end the world, and I'm going to guess that my grandparents thought the same of my parent's. I have an 18 year old daughter and when I go to her school to pick her up, or to various functions, I am amazed at the slackers that abound!
 

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