cherokeeruby
Well-known member
Subject: Lawyers
>
>
>This is why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they
>aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a small Texas town
>prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand - a
>grandmotherly, elderly woman.
>
>He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?
>
> She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
>since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big
>disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you
>manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think
>you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will
>amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
>
>The lawyer was stunned.
>
>Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked,
>
>"Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
>
> She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr.Bradley since he
>was a
>youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
>can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is
>one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his
>wife with three different women. Yes, I know him."
>
> The defense attorney almost died! At this point, the judge brought
>the
>court room to silence, called both counselors to the bench, and in a
>very quiet voice, said, "If either of you b*stards asks her if she
>knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt."
>
>
>This is why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they
>aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a small Texas town
>prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand - a
>grandmotherly, elderly woman.
>
>He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?
>
> She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
>since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big
>disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you
>manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think
>you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will
>amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
>
>The lawyer was stunned.
>
>Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked,
>
>"Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
>
> She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr.Bradley since he
>was a
>youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
>can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is
>one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his
>wife with three different women. Yes, I know him."
>
> The defense attorney almost died! At this point, the judge brought
>the
>court room to silence, called both counselors to the bench, and in a
>very quiet voice, said, "If either of you b*stards asks her if she
>knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt."
