How are they going to survive

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kerley

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Just some thoughts about the economy and our young folks. Many of us on CT are older and have suffered hard times and survived. As far as I know my children are hanging in there. If they are suffering they have not told us. This week I received calls from two nephews needing loans. Both have borrowed from us in the past and then forgot that they knew us, and never repaid the loans. It is very hurtful to receive these calls. I do not as a rule talk about personal family things but this is an exception as I am feeling Guilty. Whats your opinion?
Tom.
 
A son or daughter wanting to borrow money I might understand, but a nephew? No way. Forgive but don't forget. If the bank doesn't want their business I certainly wouldn't.
 
I have to think that if these nephews had repaid the money they'd "borrowed" from you before, you might be more inclined to be charitable toward them. I know it's hurts like crazy to be in this kind of situation, but by them not repaying you the last time around, I think it takes a heck of a lot of nerve on their parts to ask again.

GAWD, I hate it when stuff like this comes up...my heart goes out to you.

Alice
 
Alice":3a6hjx2v said:
I have to think that if these nephews had repaid the money they'd "borrowed" from you before, you might be more inclined to be charitable toward them. I know it's hurts like crazy to be in this kind of situation, but by them not repaying you the last time around, I think it takes a heck of a lot of nerve on their parts to ask again.

GAWD, I hate it when stuff like this comes up...my heart goes out to you.

Alice
I agree wholeheartedly with what Alice said. Where are their parents anyway?
 
I have a brother that "BORROWS" money like that. I used to LOAN him some once in a while. Then one day I asked him for a date when it would be paid back and when he asked my why I told him I needed to know the date on which he would start acting like he never heard of me. He said I was crazy and 6 months later to the day he proved me right. That was the end of it for me. No more LOANS.

Either treat it like a gift or don't do it. Cuz you KNOW you ain't gonna get paid back.
 
Alice":2otouqt5 said:
I have to think that if these nephews had repaid the money they'd "borrowed" from you before, you might be more inclined to be charitable toward them. I know it's hurts like crazy to be in this kind of situation, but by them not repaying you the last time around, I think it takes a heck of a lot of nerve on their parts to ask again.

GAWD, I hate it when stuff like this comes up...my heart goes out to you.

Alice
I agree with Alice.I can't believe they had the nerve to ask to borrow again. You might just remind them of the last time they borrowed money from you.
 
Had a co-worker ask for a loan once. I told him no, but I had 1500 foot of fence that needed clearing out and rebuilt. He took the job.
 
john250":2k0v7dfp said:
You won't do them any favor if you lend them money. Just postpone the inevitable.

Love the avatar. New dog or you betting on grooming as a hedge against inflation? I bet you two look good out together on walks.
 
john250":hrwbl6i0 said:
You won't do them any favor if you lend them money. Just postpone the inevitable.

1. Agreed.

2. Fool me once... you know the deal.

3. Give a man a fish and he eats dinner that nite, teach a man to fish...

...depending on their level of sincerity and my trust, here is what we've been doing when "the calls" come... we have plenty of work to do at the ranch -- but since we're doing all the brain work and all we have available is simple labor (you know - fixing fences, tearing down old fences, driving new fence posts, etc.) -- we pay minimum wage. You work for eight hours, you get paid 8 hours -- with a lunch break allowed. If they need the money, they'll work for it. If they decline the job opportunity... well then, zip is what you get paid.

Good luck and my heart goes out to you. Not easy conversations to have with ANY family member.
 
Yep, offer work if you have it, and you may not this time of year, and then remind them about the unpaid loan from last time and tell them that you aren't in the business of handing out free money.

I am always in awe of people who "forget" to repay loans and then as for more money later. They should be in a side show, cause they got big ones.
 
Lammie":327h4pq2 said:
Yep, offer work if you have it, and you may not this time of year, and then remind them about the unpaid loan from last time and tell them that you aren't in the business of handing out free money.

I am always in awe of people who "forget" to repay loans and then as for more money later. They should be in a side show, cause they got big ones.

Sounds a bit like some of these bad loans the gov't is trying to work out. Ninja loans some called them... No income..No job.. No assets.
 
There's rarely a shortage of work around a farm or ranch... the guy can split your firewood or shovel out the path to the barn in the winter, usually it's all stuff you would do anyhow, but at least they have to be willing to work for it

heck some people get put to work just for visiting me!
 
We don't get snow around here to speak of, so really, you feed and wean and wait between calving. Now, the firewood thing comes in handy. You can never have too much firewood. Good time of year to build stuff and fix stuff and knock over cedar trees... My dad used to burn a lot of brush in winter. Too dry for that now out here.
 
Lammie":kf3ccmlu said:
john250":kf3ccmlu said:
You won't do them any favor if you lend them money. Just postpone the inevitable.

Love the avatar. New dog or you betting on grooming as a hedge against inflation? I bet you two look good out together on walks.

It's my new bird dog. Kinda hard to see the peacock feathers in that tiny pic.
 
john250":8om5iozg said:
Lammie":8om5iozg said:
john250":8om5iozg said:
You won't do them any favor if you lend them money. Just postpone the inevitable.

Love the avatar. New dog or you betting on grooming as a hedge against inflation? I bet you two look good out together on walks.

It's my new bird dog. Kinda hard to see the peacock feathers in that tiny pic.


Looks like you borrowed it from Siegfried and Roy. All you need now is a matching jumpsuit.
 
kerley":280kfou7 said:
I do not as a rule talk about personal family things but this is an exception as I am feeling Guilty. Whats your opinion?
Tom.

Tom if it were my nephews I would find out what the money is intended for. If it was to pay cell phone bills, satellite television etc, I would not loan it.

If they needed money for groceries, I'd go to the store with them and buy the groceries myself. They could have those for free. No repayment necessary.

I have already helped out some this winter (not family). I had told myself that since the election went the way it did, my income was going to be slammed substantially wtih taxes, that the charity wagon was going to close. Then I found out some kids were hungry. It aint their fault. I couldn't help myself.
 
backhoeboogie":1uu3vgu8 said:
kerley":1uu3vgu8 said:
I do not as a rule talk about personal family things but this is an exception as I am feeling Guilty. Whats your opinion?
Tom.

Tom if it were my nephews I would find out what the money is intended for. If it was to pay cell phone bills, satellite television etc, I would not loan it.

If they needed money for groceries, I'd go to the store with them and buy the groceries myself. They could have those for free. No repayment necessary.

I have already helped out some this winter (not family). I had told myself that since the election went the way it did, my income was going to be slammed substantially wtih taxes, that the charity wagon was going to close. Then I found out some kids were hungry. It aint their fault. I couldn't help myself.

I bet a lot of folks here have dished out some free groceries. Groceries, not cash.

If any of you have local cattlemen's groups, a donation to a food pantry could get a lot of good press while really brightening a few folks lives. And at the current price of fats, it wouldn't cost a lot.
 
John our church has a large food pantry. People come by constantly. They don't give out any cash but will feed them and buy them some gas if they're just passing thru. Local folks can come by and get a pretty good bag of groceries. Not a big community but sure serves a lot of folks from everywhere and anywhere.
 
TexasBred":53nqtknk said:
John our church has a large food pantry. People come by constantly. They don't give out any cash but will feed them and buy them some gas if they're just passing thru. Local folks can come by and get a pretty good bag of groceries. Not a big community but sure serves a lot of folks from everywhere and anywhere.

I salute you. Several churches here do the same. Food banks are facing increased demand and falling income. Sign of the times. I can't feed everyone, but I can help.
 

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