Jogeephus
Well-known member
Lately there have been a lot of dead crows laying on the sides of the roads so much so that researchers for the Department of Transportation began sampling the highways and within a 10 mile stretch found over 200 dead crows near my home. They had concern that the crows may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with semi-trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
The DOT then hired the world renowned Ornithological Behaviorist, Dr. Vladimir Putin, to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of lorry kills versus car kills. Dr. Putin quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. and the scientific conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say 'Cah', none could say 'semi-truck'. I'm relieved that they have put this issue to rest since Avian Flu would have been devastating to our poultry industry.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with semi-trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
The DOT then hired the world renowned Ornithological Behaviorist, Dr. Vladimir Putin, to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of lorry kills versus car kills. Dr. Putin quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. and the scientific conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say 'Cah', none could say 'semi-truck'. I'm relieved that they have put this issue to rest since Avian Flu would have been devastating to our poultry industry.