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Grasshopper & Ant

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txag

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here's one i think we've seen before but worth repeating:


OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his

house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands

to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while

others are cold and starving. CBS, CNN, NBC, and ABC show up to

provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the

ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is

stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of

such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the

Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when

they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a

demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film

the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel

down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. John Kerry, John Edwards,

Ted Kennedy, Tom Daschle , Dick Gephart, Hillary Clinton and Howard Dean

stage an interview with Peter Jennings claiming that the ant has

gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and call for an immediate

tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share." Finally, the

EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act,"

retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for

failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having

nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by

the government. Hillary Clinton gets her old law firm to represent the

grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is

tried before a panel of Federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed

from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the

case. As the story ends, as we see the grasshopper finishing up the

last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which

just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he

doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. Later, the

grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident and the house,

now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the

once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican
 

la4angus

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Thanks txag.
Election time is getting closer.
Let us never forget.
 

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