Girls night out

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Well-known member
Feb 21, 2004
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1. I have absolutely no idea where my purse is.

2. I believe that dancing with my arms overhead and wiggling my butt

while yelling WOOHOO is truly the sexiest dance move around.

3. I've suddenly decided I want to kick someone's ass and honestly

believe I could do it too.

4. In my last trip to "pee" I realize I now look more like Tammy Faye

Baker than the goddess I was just four hours ago.

5. I drop my 3:00 a.m. burrito on the floor (which I'm eating even

though I'm not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating


6. I start crying and telling everyone I see that I love them sooooo


7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work.

8. I've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.

9. The man I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher!

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and

sing or dance becomes strangely overwhelming.

11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep

them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.

12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.

13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me just

lemonade, but that's just because I can no longer taste the gin.

14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the kitchen floor.

15. I start every conversation with a booming, "DON'T take this the

WRONG WAY but..."

16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it.

17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling takedown moves.

18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor (wherever I happen to be

standing) and take a quick nap.

19. I begin leaving the buttons open on my button fly pants to cut down

on the time I'm in the bathroom away from my drink.

20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm

having problems walking straight.

21. I start believing that everyone in the room wants to see my boobs.

You probably laughed at the ones that apply (or applied) to you. Send

this along to all the girls you know who like to have fun. Make them

laugh at themselves like you do. (We all know who we are, or were!)

Life with a man is like a pack of cards...u need a heart to love him, a

diamond to marry him, a club to bash his head in and a spade to bury

his ass!

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