Daily Chuckle
- Thread starter D2Cat
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wbvs58
Well-known member
greybeard
Well-known member
And this was the last time my wife asked me to fold the clothes in the dryer:
Ouachita
Well-known member
You should've been a gynecologist
greybeard
Well-known member
A man in Alaska was grieving over the loss of
his wife, who went missing in an apparent kayaking accident...
After notifying the Alaska state Police of the accident, the man went home and waited for word from the authorities...
The next day, a knock came on the front door and when the man opened the door, there were two grim faced Alaska State Troopers standing on the stoop.
The man asked... "Did you find my wife...?!?"
The troopers removed their hats and held them by the brims, as if in a respectful way and said...
"Yes sire, we found your wife and her kayak... and, we have some bad news, some good news and some really great news... which would you like to hear first...?"
Nervously, the man said..
"Well, give me the bad news first.."
With that, the Trooper said,
"Unfortunately, your wife is, in fact, dead... Apparently, when the kayak capsized, she was bitten by a shark in Kacamak Bay..."
"And, what's the good news?" asked the husband...
Then the trooper told the man...
"Well, when the rescue boat pulled her body out of the water, there were more that twelve - twenty five pound King Crabs, feeding on her... And, well... the Commissioner feels it is only proper that you be entitled to the catch..."
Still a little shaken over the news, the man asked...
"And, what is the really great news you have...?"
With that the Troopers looked at each other and the first trooper began to speak to the grieving man... he said...
"Well, sir, the great news is... We're going to pull her up again tomorrow..."
...................................
Thelma and Louise spent an entire movie
challenging sexist stereotypes...................
then ended up dying due to terrible driving
..................
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you recognize a mistake when you make it again.
..........
Lorena Bobbit reportedly dead in car accident.
Some dick cut her off.
...............
Did you hear about this new diet where you fast
for seven days?
I don't think one should fast for seven days--it would make one weak.
----------------------------
If you are an American when you go into a bathroom and an American when you come out, what are you when you are inside ?
European
his wife, who went missing in an apparent kayaking accident...
After notifying the Alaska state Police of the accident, the man went home and waited for word from the authorities...
The next day, a knock came on the front door and when the man opened the door, there were two grim faced Alaska State Troopers standing on the stoop.
The man asked... "Did you find my wife...?!?"
The troopers removed their hats and held them by the brims, as if in a respectful way and said...
"Yes sire, we found your wife and her kayak... and, we have some bad news, some good news and some really great news... which would you like to hear first...?"
Nervously, the man said..
"Well, give me the bad news first.."
With that, the Trooper said,
"Unfortunately, your wife is, in fact, dead... Apparently, when the kayak capsized, she was bitten by a shark in Kacamak Bay..."
"And, what's the good news?" asked the husband...
Then the trooper told the man...
"Well, when the rescue boat pulled her body out of the water, there were more that twelve - twenty five pound King Crabs, feeding on her... And, well... the Commissioner feels it is only proper that you be entitled to the catch..."
Still a little shaken over the news, the man asked...
"And, what is the really great news you have...?"
With that the Troopers looked at each other and the first trooper began to speak to the grieving man... he said...
"Well, sir, the great news is... We're going to pull her up again tomorrow..."
...................................
Thelma and Louise spent an entire movie
challenging sexist stereotypes...................
then ended up dying due to terrible driving
..................
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you recognize a mistake when you make it again.
..........
Lorena Bobbit reportedly dead in car accident.
Some dick cut her off.
...............
Did you hear about this new diet where you fast
for seven days?
I don't think one should fast for seven days--it would make one weak.
----------------------------
If you are an American when you go into a bathroom and an American when you come out, what are you when you are inside ?
European
TexasJerseyMilker
Well-known member
coachg
Well-known member
Plants and seed have got so expensive and fertilizer too . It makes you think about planting a garden anymore .
CowboyRam
Well-known member
Everything is way to high. My sister is wanting me to build a chicken house. I am pretty sure those eggs are going to cost more than buying them at Walmart. She had found a place to put the thing, and then I though lets put it somewhere where I can pull up to it with the tractor to clean it out when that time comes. So maybe next year we may have a few chickens. I have enough plywood and 2x's roofing material to build it, just don't have much for siding.
Mark Reynolds
Well-known member
- Joined
- May 30, 2023
- Messages
- 1,272
- Reaction score
- 1,443
Here is a thought on chickens. Look into what a 'chicken tractor' is and see if you want to consider that.
CowboyRam
Well-known member
I'm going to put it on skids so I can move it if needed. I have a couple of short railroad ties.
coachg
Well-known member
I have 3 chicken tractors , 2 on wheels and a smaller one that I slide or move by hand . I pull the other 2 with my Polaris. I still let 2 of the flocks out each day . .My main advice : whatever you build don't use chicken wire ! It will keep chickens in but nothing out . Dogs , coyotes, coons .
branxchar&charx
Well-known member
CowboyRam
Well-known member
I have some of those hog panels that I used to keep the goats in. That should probably work.
Ouachita
Well-known member
I just pick eggs out of the side-by-side every morning. My wife fetches them out of the greenhouse and the wood shed. Don't make it harder than it needs to be.
CowboyRam
Well-known member
Travlr
Well-known member
An old French lady had a small shop in her village for years until one day a huge corporate supermarket set up across the road from her little shop.
They put up signs advertising their prices, including one that said:
Butter – 10 francs.
In response, the old lady added a sign to her own window:
Butter – 9 francs.
The next day, the big supermarket had a new sign:
Butter – 8 francs.
Sure enough, the day after the old lady's sign now read:
Butter – 7 francs.
This went on for a while until eventually one of the lady's customers pointed to the sign and said,
"Madame, you cannot keep your prices so low for long. These big companies can use their buying power to sell products cheaper, but a little store like yours can never compete."
In response, the old lady bent forward conspiratorially and muttered,
"Monsieur, I don't even sell butter."
They put up signs advertising their prices, including one that said:
Butter – 10 francs.
In response, the old lady added a sign to her own window:
Butter – 9 francs.
The next day, the big supermarket had a new sign:
Butter – 8 francs.
Sure enough, the day after the old lady's sign now read:
Butter – 7 francs.
This went on for a while until eventually one of the lady's customers pointed to the sign and said,
"Madame, you cannot keep your prices so low for long. These big companies can use their buying power to sell products cheaper, but a little store like yours can never compete."
In response, the old lady bent forward conspiratorially and muttered,
"Monsieur, I don't even sell butter."
