Country-speak

[larryshoat]

That boy is so ugly they had to tie a pork chop around his neck to get the dog to play with him.

That boy is so ugly his mother breast fed him through a straw.

Larry

 

[presmudjo]

Thanks for the rest of Dad's little verse. I sure do miss him. The front yard was the door yard. The end of a phone conversation was you bet, not goodbye.

 

[mo gman]

if a frog had wings, he would't bump his butt when he hopped

 

[slick4591]

She's got a butt as wide as a broad axe.

 

[cow pollinater]

Another AI tech and I were discussing a manager that works at his company. I was trying to feel him out before I did any business with them. He said,"watch out. That snake don't rattle."

 

[D2Cat]

Mom always said, "If wishes were fishes we'd all have a fry."

 

[chrisy]

when my brothers and me came in from playing our Mum would say 'Bath you three 'your as black as Newgate's knocker' (it's a London saying originating from Victorian times referring to the knocker on the front of Newgate prison).
we also have the saying 'it's as black as ya 'at'