AARP Forum

Help Support CattleToday:

TexasBred

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 15, 2007
Messages
31,075
Reaction score
625
Location
Heart of Texas
Questions and Answers from an AARP Forum
Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore under fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done
you'll have a place to live.
Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible. Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92: "And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt ."
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60-plus year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these Crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.
Q: Why should 60-plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.
Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage? A: Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon..
Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores? A: "Gosh, I remember these!"
 
Come on fellows , i thought it was funny as hello. You ain't no older than you feel. I'm going down to the local watering hole and talk to the ladies. :banana: :banana:
 
curtis":2t1vme8v said:
Come on fellows , i thought it was funny as hello. You ain't no older than you feel. I'm going down to the local watering hole and talk to the ladies. :banana: :banana:
That's the way to think Curtis....Don't forget the Viagra. :banana: :lol2: :cry2:
 
TexasBred":224q71ni said:
curtis":224q71ni said:
Come on fellows , i thought it was funny as hello. You ain't no older than you feel. I'm going down to the local watering hole and talk to the ladies. :banana: :banana:
That's the way to think Curtis....Don't forget the Viagra. :banana: :lol2: :cry2:

I don't need any help right now , maybe in a few years. I'm talking to a real pretty sweet thang rite now.
I just hope i got enough money in my pocket for the moonshine and booze to fill up her holler leg. Mercy, this gal can hid some liquor. If all works out something may pop like breaking a sweet gum limb about 2 am. :lol: :lol:
 
Correction , they just turned the lights on so they can fix the bands amplifier. :shock: :shock: I want my money back.
 
curtis":1gflwof9 said:
Correction , they just turned the lights on so they can fix the bands amplifier. :shock: :shock: I want my money back.
Was going to say to pet her once for me........now I'm glad I didn't. :lol:
 
TexasBred":y9q4j3hs said:
3waycross":y9q4j3hs said:
Red Bull Breeder":y9q4j3hs said:
No i ain't 60 oldtimer.


GEEEEEZ RBB that's the worst thing anyone ever called me.
3way you're lucky....a so-called jacka$$ friend called me an "old fossil" the other day. :lol2:
I guess I shouldn't complain about "antique" then? :?
Valerie
 

Latest posts

Top