alisonb
Well-known member
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says 'I clocked you at 80 miles/hour, Sir'.
The driver says 'Gee officer, I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating!'
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car does not have cruise control.'
As the officer writes out a ticket the driver looks over at his wife and growls 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once'.
The wife smiles demurely and says 'You should be thankful your radar detector unit went off when it did'.
As the officer makes out a second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth 'Dammet woman!, can't you keep your mouth shut?'
The officer frowns and says 'And I notice that you were not wearing your seat belt, Sir. That is an automatic $75 fine'.
The driver says 'Yea, well, you see officer, I had it on but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket'.
The wife says 'Now dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on, you never wear your seat belt when you are driving'.
And as the officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks 'Why don't you please SHUT UP?'
The officer looks over at the wife and asks 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?'
'Only when he has been drinking officer' she answers.
The driver says 'Gee officer, I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating!'
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car does not have cruise control.'
As the officer writes out a ticket the driver looks over at his wife and growls 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once'.
The wife smiles demurely and says 'You should be thankful your radar detector unit went off when it did'.
As the officer makes out a second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth 'Dammet woman!, can't you keep your mouth shut?'
The officer frowns and says 'And I notice that you were not wearing your seat belt, Sir. That is an automatic $75 fine'.
The driver says 'Yea, well, you see officer, I had it on but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket'.
The wife says 'Now dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on, you never wear your seat belt when you are driving'.
And as the officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks 'Why don't you please SHUT UP?'
The officer looks over at the wife and asks 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?'
'Only when he has been drinking officer' she answers.
