Recent content by Angus Guy

I'm doing it now. I wish they would separate the pesticide from the herbicide part of it--I don't use pesticides to any more extent than most homeowners would. You might want to read the study manual alittle closer. A pesticide is something gets rid of a pest. Since weeds are pests therefore a...

What do you call a steer that twitchs? Beef Jerky

Last night I was having a drink when a fat ugly woman came up to me and said, "you're cute, think I can have your number?" I replied, "got a pen?" She said, "of course I do." I told her, "you better get back to it before the farmer notices you're gone."

Deep thought Shoveled some snow today and after doing so I sat down and had a couple of nice cold beers. The day was really quite beautiful, and the brew ignited some deep thinking on various topics . . . .Finally I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting...

Sharing of marriage... The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink. He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife. He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed...

No dictionary has been able to adequately explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED. However, in a recent linguistic conference held in London, England and attended by some of the best linguists in the world: Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese, was the clear winner. His final...

THIS IS PRICELESS! In parochial school students are taught that lying is a sin. However, Instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination was OK to express the Truth differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings: Subject: A...

yes..

Come up to west central IL and try to find pastures to rent. If you can find them 20-50$/a for grass season will be the range. Now compare that crop ground at 250-500$/a. Bet you can guess how much grass is for rent.

For all my grammatically correct friends. On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction! After being...

The Nun & golf A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair. She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration. 'What troubles you, Sister?' asked the Mother Superior .. 'I thought this was the day you spent with your family.' 'It was,' sighed the Sister...

How about putting them in the empty tubs? That's what I do.

Well Denvermartin we down your way made it about half way to your place. Second honeymoon for the wife. Stayed in Branson and caught a show. Saturday we went touring and were about 5-10 miles east of Forsyth (how can you tell with all the twist and turns). :D Some neat country but looks like it...

Haven't done this in awhile but here goes. Dun and Stocky Your roads down there are even more crooked than I remember. Also I have never run into so many dead -end roads. Now I know I'm in the Ozarks and the state doesn't have much money but please put up some dead-end signs for us...

They would lose to many tax dollars if they did that. :bang: