Military terms put in perspective

[TexasBred]

All of the military guys I sent it to got a hoot out of it. A couple were even AF types.

We all love air crappers....everytime I see an AF jet go over I just give him a wink and think "Giv'em he77" buddy.

[Caustic Burno]

Of most everyone here, I would have thought caustic would have enjoyed this most. Him being so good with word play and all.

Our military people set on a pedestal with me.
I can take a joke, laugh at one on me, and really enjoy a good one.
I have a lot of fault's you have never seen me post anything disrespectful or joking when it comes to our military.
The Service Man has given me all my rights and privileges paid for in blood not the politican.

[HOSS]

I was 504th PIR 82nd Airborne. What you posted hook was tame compared to what we used to call the AF guys. We loved those guys though. I think they new every birdshiite joke known to man when they got their shots in on us

[TexasBred]

Army, Air Force, and Marine Generals were standing in front of a rappelling tower with a Navy Admiral. The Air Force General says to the others, "My men are the most courageous of the Armed Forces."

"Ha!" said Army, "My men are the most courageous and I'll prove it."

Army calls a Private over from the tower. He tells the Private, "I want you to jump off that tower - no rope, no parachute."

"Yes, Sir!!!" the Private yells and proceeds to climb the tower. The Private walks to the edge, yells "Hoo-ahh!" and jumps off the tower. He is killed instantly upon impact.

"That's nothing," the Air Force General said, bored. He calls a Senior Airman over. "Son, I want you to jump off that tower - no rope, no parachute and I want you to do it with style."

"Yes, Sir!!!" the Senior Airman yells. He climbs to the top of the tower, walks to the edge and jumps. He executes a swan dive that would make Greg Louganis proud, hits the ground and dies on impact.

"Hmmph," the Marine growled. "Ya'll obviously forgot the Marine Corps were here," he said (yelling "Marine Corps!" as all Marines tend to do.)

He calls a Lance Corporal over. "Marine, I want you to jump off that tower and make the Corps proud!"

The Corporal yells, "Ooh-rah!", by way of response and runs to the tower. He grabs an M-60 and ammunition belt on the way and wraps the belt around himself in the Pancho Villa style. He climbs the tower and walks to the edge. Upon reaching the edge, he throws two grenades into the air, yells "Semper Fi Do or Die!" and jumps off. He starts shooting the M-60 in mid-air, clipping treetops and yelling the entire way down. His impact is obscured by the two exploding grenades. When the smoke clears, only little pieces of the Marine are left.

The others are impressed and nod their heads in admiration. Then the Admiral says, "That's nothing." The others turn to face the Admiral, their faces in disbelief. The Admiral calls a Seaman over who was cleaning latrines. "Son, I want you to jump off that tower- no rope, no parachute."

The Seaman looks the Admiral in the face and says, "Screw you! You kiss my ass first!" and walks off.

The Admiral turns to the others and says, "Now THAT'S courage!"

[ChrisB]

At the 'swearing in' ceremony for my daughter there were members from all branches of the service swearing in at one time. Before they started the lieutenant(?) asked the recruits how they slept the night before. There were replies of "Good Sir" coming from around the room. The Lieutenant replied "That's good because you won't be getting much sleep for the next 10 weeks. Well, except for you going into the Air Force, you will get plenty of naps."

[Calman]

Military rival I guess you'd call it has been going on for years.
I was a 101st Airborne Ranger and was told all time that it takes an Idiot to jump from a perfectly good airplane.I'm sure Hoss and some of y'all here can relate to this. Every soilder is proud of their branch of the military and that's the way it should be. It takes all to make a great fighting force.

Cal

[HOSS]

Military rival I guess you'd call it has been going on for years.
I was a 101st Airborne Ranger and was told all time that it takes an Idiot to jump from a perfectly good airplane.I'm sure Hoss and some of y'all here can relate to this. Every soilder is proud of their branch of the military and that's the way it should be. It takes all to make a great fighting force.

Cal

Cal, there was plenty of times I told myself that same phrase. Especially on a night jump. I thought I was an idiot for choosing AB the first time I climed the tower at Benning, and the 2nd time, 3rd time and every time after that. I thought I was a bigger idiot learning fastrope techniques with the 101st in Air Assault school. For some reason sliding out of a perfectly good helo on a rope scared me more than bailing out of a C130.

[Calman]

Cal, there was plenty of times I told myself that same phrase. Especially on a night jump. I thought I was an idiot for choosing AB the first time I climed the tower at Benning, and the 2nd time, 3rd time and every time after that. I thought I was a bigger idiot learning fastrope techniques with the 101st in Air Assault school. For some reason sliding out of a perfectly good helo on a rope scared me more than bailing out of a C130.[/quote]

No what ya mean Hoss.There was no sure thing your shute would open.And those towers looked to be 1000ft tall and even taller when looking down. I was scared for about 8to 10 seconds every jump I made.I guess that was the excitement of jumping,the rush when you left the plane.
The real scarey part was being lifted out of the jungle by those ropes when they didn't have a clearing to set the slick down.Puts a whole new meaning to tarzan. Saved my bacon a couple times though. It would take a whole platoon of men to pry me loose from a plane in flight now. In jump school our jump Sgt. told us if our shute faled to open ,when we hit the ground,go to sears and get a good one.

Cal

[HOSS]

calman, You probably used the STABO rigs for jungle extractions during your time. We used a modified version called the SPIES rig. The scary part is the extraction because of obstacle clearance and then everybody on the line turning loose of the rope in mid-flight to do the old arm spread to help stabilize the group to keep the spinning at a minimum. Flying high over Ft. Campbell on a rope hanging from the bottom of a helo can get your heart rate up.

I agree on the platoon of guys to get me out of a plane now:) That first few second after the jump when the static line pulls out the chute and you hope it pops without a line tangle is high adrenaline. Then it is relax until the controlled crash happens and hope you hit the DZ. I always agonized over the body and equipment check prior to the jump hoping I didn't have an idiot checking my chute and static line wrap.

[Calman]

Hoss seeing as how I only weighed 140lbs I found myself sometimes hiking several meters just to get back to the DZ. Several times jumping when the wind was calm and then when you busted through the clouds it was so wendy it blew you around like a feather.Seems like once we left the runway it didn't matter what the weather changed to you still had to jump.I even had the privilage of landing on top of a barn one time.Now that there was interesting.

Cal

[HOSS]

Hoss seeing as how I only weighed 140lbs I found myself sometimes hiking several meters just to get back to the DZ. Several times jumping when the wind was calm and then when you busted through the clouds it was so wendy it blew you around like a feather.Seems like once we left the runway it didn't matter what the weather changed to you still had to jump.I even had the privilage of landing on top of a barn one time.Now that there was interesting.

Cal

I weighed about a buck 80 so when jumping Hollywood (thats what we called jumping without gear) I even floated out of the DZ a few times. Fortunatley not too far away and not onto barns........but in trees once. When jumping with a full combat load of 100 lbs I felt like a rock falling. 280 lbs on a 350lb rated chute. Nothing like a good windy day to drag you around across rough ground and stubble

I'll stick to commercial flights and my pick-up truck these days. My knees and lower back cant take much more abuse.

[Calman]

Cal[/quote]
I weighed about a buck 80 so when jumping Hollywood (thats what we called jumping without gear) I even floated out of the DZ a few times. Fortunatley not too far away and not onto barns........but in trees once. When jumping with a full combat load of 100 lbs I felt like a rock falling. 280 lbs on a 350lb rated chute. Nothing like a good windy day to drag you around across rough ground and stubble

I'll stick to commercial flights and my pick-up truck these days. My knees and lower back cant take much more abuse.[/quote]

Know what ya mean Hoss,know the real feeling of being roped and dragged.
I figure while serving I practised punishing this old body enough that I don't aim to do it anymore.
Wishing now I'd have taking better care of it.
I jumped for seven years and now you'd have to put up a convincing fight to just to get me to fly anymore.If I cant get there by driving I don't rekon I need to be there.And I've seen all the far countries that I need to see.Worst part of my serving in the army was 26 days on a troop carrier.
Not counting the two terms in nam that is.
Went to Korea via the south pacific on the USS General Brekinridge.Then I really found out I was glad I didn't join the Navy.

Cal